Intimacy: Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive... - FML

By Anonymous - 02/02/2012 18:07 - India

Spicy

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 497

You deserved it 26 043

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Same thing different taste

By not living happily ever after - 02/12/2014 17:02 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, I deleted a load of junk that was messing up my mother's computer. I don't know how I'm going to tell her I accidentally wiped out all of her wedding photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 459

You deserved it 31 469

Surprise !

By Shrekkk - 02/07/2019 06:14

Spicy

Today, I accidentally connected my phone to my mum's headphones while watching porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 2 590

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 05:56 - Canada

Spicy

Today, while I was getting it on with my girlfriend I accidentally called out "Mom" instead of her name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 500

You deserved it 44 097

Great chat!

By eric - 16/03/2011 07:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 236

You deserved it 96 457

MILF

By Anonymous - 12/11/2020 08:03

Spicy

Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 294

You deserved it 601

Ungeeked

By Anonymous - 28/02/2021 04:01 - United States - Weyauwega

Today, while trying to fix a corrupted USB hard drive with my wife’s computer I accidentally wiped her laptop drive instead of clearing the external drive. I’m not allowed on her computers anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 287

You deserved it 1 582

Play it cool

By Fraser - 08/03/2012 19:03 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 203

You deserved it 56 646

By hb1 - 04/06/2016 18:15 - United Kingdom - Middlesbrough

Today, I caught my "best friend" on my laptop, copying my girlfriend's nudes onto his flash drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 725

You deserved it 3 164

Two in one

By cactii - 16/02/2015 20:43 - United States

Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 447

You deserved it 14 433

NSFW

By Anonymous - 14/11/2013 10:57 - Australia - Brisbane

Spicy

Today, while chatting to my mother, I tried to show her a funny website by pasting the URL into a message. After I sent the message, I realised that my browser hadn't copied the URL I wanted to send her, and that I'd actually pasted the previous URL I copied. It was porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 675

You deserved it 47 673

Next

Top comments

21jason 9

Thursday 2 February 2012 22:43

I hope you had enough tissues

Jakesterk96 8

Thursday 2 February 2012 22:44

Take a moment with twix. Problem solved.

Comments

jmad109 3

Friday 3 February 2012 1:43

Says your from india...maybe just maybe u should be good with pcs? Dont hate my best friend is indian :P

SmittyJA24 26

Friday 3 February 2012 1:53

OP's Freudian slip is showing....

1a2b3c4d5e678D 0

Friday 3 February 2012 1:57

Awkies!!!!!!!(:

xZoeAmethystx 12

Friday 3 February 2012 2:02

Congras', you successfully made a awkward situation.

CRC_101 31

Friday 3 February 2012 2:18

A mere slip of the tongue; nothing wrong with that! ^_-

lolatyofail 0

Friday 3 February 2012 2:32

did u wear protection

madigoosmith 0

Friday 3 February 2012 3:12

DAMN U AUTOCORRECT!!!!!

caysters 12

Friday 3 February 2012 3:15

Anyone else find it funny that he failed at giving computer advice... Yet he lives in India where almost all of our tech support calls go to? I lol'd...

Cody24485 0

Friday 3 February 2012 3:19

Damn, I never thought of that, I'm going to tell myself NEVER to do that, and end up doing it anyway.

yeahreally 6

Friday 3 February 2012 3:25

ahaha thats hilarious.

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Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, after six months of doing the job of 2 people, because all my coworker does is sleep and sit down with her phone, I told my boss that I can't be doing my coworker's job and getting the same salary as her. My boss added just $10 to my salary and told me to let her carry on doing nothing, while I still do the work of 2 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 131

Today, my husband filed for divorce. He also put himself “In a relationship” with my daughter on Facebook. She turned 18 a few days ago. He says it’s no big deal because, “at least I waited until she was legal.” The spineless idiot just doesn’t get it. FML

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The Top

Today, my mother bitched at me for spending $200 on a new clothes I needed for my new job as a bank teller. I then received a notification on my phone that my mother's lingerie order was shipped. She spent $800 on teddies and crotchless panties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 165

You deserved it 84

Today, I got stopped for shoplifting at a department store. They took me back to the security room and showed me the tapes. I was taking my own designer lipgloss that I had bought a month before out of my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 253

You deserved it 4 345

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time only to realise she squeals like a baby pig in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 410

You deserved it 9 429

Today, I'm seven months pregnant and going to college. I had to use the bathroom, but all of the bathrooms at my building were closed, so I had to walk to the next building, a block away. I didn't make it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 873

You deserved it 2 063

Today, I absentmindedly stuck two magnets in my mouth while talking, and accidentally swallowed them. I had to go the emergency room. The nurses at the station laughed at me. They thought it was a joke. They couldn't believe an 18 year old would swallow magnets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 803

You deserved it 77 170

Today, it might be the day I ask my wife to peg me. Hope it goes well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 1 270