Intimacy: Today, I asked my boyfriend about his views on personal growth.... - FML

By what - 25/09/2013 14:42 - Canada - Edmonton

Spicy

Today, I asked my boyfriend about his views on personal growth. He replied, "What, you mean dick size?" FML

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Same thing different taste

Inappropriate question

By Anonymous - 07/11/2021 13:59

Spicy

Today, my new boyfriend asked to know the penis size of every other guy I’ve been with. There are a lot. FML

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You deserved it 906

By Anonymous - 19/06/2014 14:33 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

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Policy of truth

By tellingthetruth - 21/03/2012 16:25 - United Kingdom - Studley

Spicy

Today, the subject of penis size came up while my boyfriend and I were chatting. He asked if he was big, and I replied that whatever size he was, he was enough to satisfy me. Apparently, that was the wrong answer, and he spent the rest of the night sulking because I didn't say he was enormous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 494

You deserved it 14 249

By Anonymous - 03/02/2013 16:27 - Serbia

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis. Before I knew what was going on, she said, "It's not the size that matters though. It's how you use it. So I guess you're ok." FML

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Communication

By mairelys - 26/01/2010 06:56 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I tried talking to my boyfriend about our sex life. I was trying to express that I feel like we don't do it enough, but he wasn't very responsive. I ended up saying, "I wish you had a bigger sex drive" to which he answered, "I wish you had bigger boobs." FML

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By The fat and the ugly - 27/10/2011 18:56 - Finland

Spicy

Today, I was getting out of the shower, when my boyfriend decided to ask, "Did your boobs get smaller, or did you just gain weight around them?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 138

You deserved it 5 160

Awful line of inquiry

By teddyissmall - 14/04/2014 06:29 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML

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Child brain

By AnatomyLecture - 22/01/2017 14:00

Spicy

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that the size of a man's penis is not proportional to his height. He was insecure because he's 5'6" and assumed everyone taller had a bigger penis than him. He's 30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 180

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By Username - 21/04/2011 13:55

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He looked at me and said "No, but apparently you are." FML

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You deserved it 10 183

By nick - 06/03/2011 01:42 - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

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You deserved it 3 817

Next

Top comments

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 25 September 2013 19:09

What kind of question is that? We're you asking if he likes personal growth? If he believes in it? Agrees with it? You ask a stupid question, you get a smartass answer.

Imhere4fml 24

Wednesday 25 September 2013 19:06

Best first comment I have seen in a while. Original too. Sarcasm

Comments

ni0ve 9

Thursday 26 September 2013 0:06

that was a valid question

tralala453 22

Thursday 26 September 2013 1:52

That's what I thought of too to be honest...that's a really vague question.

Bradley_Dillon 39

Thursday 26 September 2013 2:39

Rawr!

StormyZero 11

Thursday 26 September 2013 3:17

At least he's got his priorities straight.

ohSNAPyall 26

Thursday 26 September 2013 4:41

"Yes. Have you ordered those pills yet?"

UrYousername 15

Thursday 26 September 2013 5:27

Someone's a bit superficial.

nevershouttami 11

Thursday 26 September 2013 6:38

"What are your views on personal growth?" Yeah, I'm sure he's not the only person who would give a dumb response to such a dumb question.

Goblin182 26

Thursday 26 September 2013 13:39

YDI for thinking guys actually think about stuff like that, let alone discuss it.

Maxilius 9

Thursday 26 September 2013 16:11

That's your answer.

o0m9 2

Thursday 26 September 2013 23:52

That's a really vague question... I'm actually not even sure what it means. Someone care to explain?

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The Top

Today, my dad has been faking social anxiety to make me feel like there's something wrong with me. How do I know? Because I actually have social anxiety, and he not only shows no symptoms of it, but he also has a lot of misconceptions about it that he would know are false if he actually did have it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 180

Today, I had awesome sex with my ex. Again. I broke up with her a few weeks ago as she admittedly hadn't been attracted to me anymore in a long time. Now she says that after we broke up she doesn't feel any pressure anymore, and can enjoy sex with me again like she did before she moved in with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 199

The Top

Today, I was wondering why my home smelled so weird, until I found out that my 4 year old son had been secretly scattering around food he didn't like to eat throughout the house. How did I find out? No one else in this family leaves half eaten spinach all over my underwear drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 866

You deserved it 3 893

Today, I spent an hour getting ready for my first date of the year, only to wait 30 minutes in the cold and then walking back home by myself. Why didn’t he show up? On his way to our date, he got invited to a threesome and decided to do that instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 508

You deserved it 248

Today, after explicitly telling everyone we know that we were having a date night to ourselves, my wife’s sister turned up at our house because she “heard you were all by yourselves without the kids so I thought I’d come over to keep you company.” Never a fucking moment to ourselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 813

You deserved it 196

Today, my lazy manager, who blatantly spreads vicious rumors about employees, one which has ruined a marriage, has started targeting me because her lazy daughter was legally fired. Now I'm known around the office as "the whore who slept her way up the corporate ladder." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 794

You deserved it 1 854

Today, I thought I was home alone, so I started singing to my cat. After a half hour of this, I finally stopped. Then I heard applauding. I turned around to find my parents standing in my doorway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 644

You deserved it 22 482

Today, I discovered why my new boyfriend likes his sex slow and loving, like super slow. It’s because, despite being in shape, he’s so unfit that if he tries to go hard and fast he struggles to breathe and passes out on top of me. Guess my love life is limited to one mile an hour now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 143