Animals: Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything...

By Lee - 10/04/2012 03:50 - United States

Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 737

You deserved it 2 922

Summer vacations: Sun and blunders
From beaches to campsites, embark on a journey filled with laughter under the sun... and a few sunburns! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 15:50 - United States

Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weedwacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgetting that I am mowing where the dogs go to the restroom, I absent-mindedly weedwack over dog poop. Which got flung into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 966

You deserved it 26 209

By Anonymous - 27/04/2011 03:07 - United States

Today, I got concussion after a goat ran in front of me while I was jogging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 438

You deserved it 4 334

By Sean - 10/06/2013 02:27 - United States

Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 267

You deserved it 7 656

By anyonmus - 12/04/2013 00:59 - United States - Westminster

Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 271

You deserved it 9 703

By coloris - 03/08/2019 00:01

Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 646

You deserved it 133

By Radgirl - 28/04/2009 02:10 - United States

Today, while on a run off campus with my german shepherd, I tried to impress a couple of hot fraternity guys playing football outside of their house. I broke out into a full sprint. I then got tangled in my dog's leash and fell straight in to a parked jeep knocking myself unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 362

You deserved it 58 505

By mraow123 - 30/05/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 387

You deserved it 4 658

By vee2013 - 26/04/2014 04:22 - Canada - London

Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean my room. When I went to pick up the first thing off my floor, I hit my head on my desk and gave myself a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 204

You deserved it 6 928

By estallidos - 23/01/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I got out of the hospital for the second time in a week. The first time was for a seizure that my cat induced by tripping me over. The second was to get stitches from the Doberman that had decided to take over my front yard while I was gone. Apparently I was intruding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 243

You deserved it 2 446

WOOF!

By Dweeb - 02/10/2019 18:00

Today, I ran into a parked car and fell into the gutter. All because a dog suddenly barked at me. From the other side of a wooden fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 643

Goatinsfriend 8

Tuesday 10 April 2012 8:39

If I was a dog..so many things I would to humans.

emmama19 15

Tuesday 10 April 2012 8:43

He was protecting the weeds. They were his friends!!!!

Comments

Skullcrusher 5

Tuesday 10 April 2012 15:46

Concussion? Give me a break!

THE_A_TEEN 27

Tuesday 10 April 2012 16:10

Yeah, concussion. Problem?

hothotxx 0

Tuesday 10 April 2012 15:51

Doggone it.!

hateevryone 14

Tuesday 10 April 2012 16:54

How big is your dog for you to get a concussion?

jellyD 1

Tuesday 10 April 2012 17:19

Twice? Ummm apparently the dog tried and failed to knock some sense Into you!

nick94n 8

Tuesday 10 April 2012 17:23

Your dog doesn't respect you at all

mrssuarez2011 12

Tuesday 10 April 2012 18:36

So you got a concussion from your dog running into you? Wow, fail.

untamed112 0

Tuesday 10 April 2012 19:08

Does the dog have a concussion too?

cuddlebunny3548 11

Tuesday 10 April 2012 21:47

Yeah because you were digging up HIS weeds!!!

xoconnie 8

Tuesday 10 April 2012 22:42

and people wonder why some people hate dogs?! this is example A guys.

DoubleCross 9

Wednesday 11 April 2012 0:43

blarg

Keywords

Gross Miscellaneous Cooking Food Money Customers Work Health Video games Pregnancy Religion Social Media Kids Awkward Neighbours Home improvement Farts Cute Babies Love Family Weddings LGBTQIA+ Jealousy Onlyfans Divorce Surprise Insomnia Sleep Embarrassing

The Top

Today, I offered to give my ex a ride home from work. He and I ended on good terms years ago, we just aren't compatible with each other. I dropped him off and not ten seconds later, he came back out looking sick. His fiancee was inside having sex with MY new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 000

You deserved it 168

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant with our third child. This wouldn't be a problem but we only want two kids and I had a vasectomy 6 weeks ago (they take 3 months to be effective). We weren't careful only one time, and since it was difficult to conceive the two we wanted, we didn't think it would be a problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 632

The Top

Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 146

You deserved it 2 698

Today, my husband taught our son how to pee while standing. His aim is as poor as my husband's, but I guess now they can blame their mess on each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 552

You deserved it 1 812

Today, my only friend confessed she loved me, but I’m not a lesbian so I had to let her down. Apparently she thought I was a lesbian too, so she ran away mortified. I just got a text that she can’t see me anymore, because it’s too painful. I have no relatives and now no friends. I’m totally alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 307

You deserved it 111

Today, my mother-in-law texted to wish me a happy birthday. She spelled my name wrong and it's not my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 858

You deserved it 322

Today, I had to explain to my mom that the phrase "turn me on" does NOT mean "make me happy." At least not in the context she was using it. She was adamant that her definition was the correct one. I'm not sure I've convinced her what it actually means. Send help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 941

You deserved it 151

Today, my vegan sister told my kids where meat and dairy products come from, in a very detailed way. They now refuse to eat meat, and want to, "rescue all the poor animals." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 926

You deserved it 542

Same thing different taste

WOOF!

Top comments

Comments