By Screwed - 07/08/2009 23:35 - Canada

Today, I decided to surprise my husband by bringing home a case of beer and renting us a porno. He decided to surprise me by telling me he was leaving me for his pregnant girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks 59 208
You deserved it 4 345
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Top comments

DameGreyWulf 0

God damn, that is just grade A bullshit right there. Well, at least you aren't the other woman. Just think; everyone knows she's a **** now, getting preggers from someone's HUSBAND. You on the other hand have one less asshole in your life.

135 1
Luckster 0

When you divorce him, squeeze every penny out of the bastard!

118 19

Comments

9az00 0

how delightfully redneck!! ******* awesome!!

2 7
Leprecon 3

"I decided to surprise my husband by bringing home a case of beer and renting us a porno." Marry me !

10 1
9az00 0

nightlight dude you're not even funny. if you're going to troll, at least come up with a funny topic.

0 2
RigChan 0

Awww, I'm sorry. You tried to do a nice thing for him. ): I hope that you just get over him quickly!

1 0
irockmyworld 0

maybe ure idea of fun isnt beer and **** but most normal guys would love it and think its the coolest thing their wife can do for them. so leave your sorry ass opinion out of this. she didnt get dumped cause she got him beer and ****, she got dumped because he went to get some ******* ***** who cudnt keep her legs shut pregnant. understand the fml then comment yeah? and by the way, with a face like yours, which only a mother could love, i'd think you would be needing **** wouldnt you? you obviously cant be getting laid with that face. go get some plastic surgery done for the love of god.

2 6
lollipops321 0

Classy gal, aren't you?

2 5
jam_21 0

#34 just like you have your own opinion about the matter, others have a right to their own opinions too and your bashing someone's appearance and shit talking them is really not gonna help you prove your point. that's just lame!

0 0
zolziski 11

Run a "congratulations" story in your local newspaper (you know how some people announce that they're married, that sort of thing), full names, and that it's a bastard love child. Buy a couple of copies and send the clippings to family and friends. Keep one for when the kid's 16.

13 0
zuli_fml 0

"Congratulations are in order for Mr. (husband's name here) who impregnated Miss Skanky McSlutpants and walked out on his wife of (however long you've been married). His wife is currently filing for divorce after hiring the most bloodthirsty divorce lawyer in the state."

6 0
Moemoemoe_fml 0

#37 That sort of thing does happens, though sadly not always to people who deserve it... I had it happen in my family, when it wasn't true. The guy running the thing in the paper was still bitter about a divorce that happened years before either party met other people and remarried, and so he made up a child born out of wedlock and all. :-/

1 0
zolziski 11

That does suck, but I'm sure the friends and family (the people who matter) knew the truth. In this case, the husband and the girlfriend deserve what's coming to them.

2 0
sara713_fml 0

#56 i'm 100% with u. But girl i would've smashed the beer on his head!

1 0
irockmyworld 0

i wasnt using it to prove my point. anyway i wasnt talkin to you so shut the **** up.

2 3