Work: Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so...

By RavingLunatic - 01/05/2015 22:17 - United States - Gilbert

Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so I went outside and screamed obscenities at the top of my lungs, before heading back inside. The police then showed up to investigate complaints of a "raving lunatic" in the area. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 289

You deserved it 24 813

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 29/08/2014 16:17 - United Kingdom - Slough

Today, after finally getting rid of an extremely rude, abusive customer, I muttered that I could kill people like her. I didn't know my manager had heard me, until a pair of police officers arrived. He'd reported me for "threatening to murder a customer". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 000

You deserved it 11 142

By AussieG75 - 21/07/2012 04:48 - United States - Saint Augustine

Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 391

You deserved it 2 552

Thanks bossman

By Anonymous - 11/10/2013 16:43 - United States - Logan

Today, I finally decided to stand up for myself and quit my crappy job working for my abusive father. I gave him a few insults too, to which he reacted by calling the police and claiming I'd threatened to murder him. I spent three hours in jail before they finally let me go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 689

You deserved it 3 921

Zoom off

By Anonymous - 26/11/2020 07:59

Today, I was caught on a hot mic during a work department meeting complaining about someone using a leaf blower, F-bombs and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 237

You deserved it 871

By breakfast tea - 07/04/2012 19:30 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, I was escorted out of the building for getting in a scuffle at my anger management class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 717

You deserved it 28 600

Public freakout

By selfdefense - 12/10/2009 04:16 - United Kingdom

Today, a customer at work became violent and started hitting me and my coworker. Not wanting him to get the shit beat out of us, I used a move that pinned the guy on the ground. The police came and he was arrested. I was then fired for assaulting a customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 691

You deserved it 2 574

By Snails - 12/06/2019 20:00

Today, while at work, I let out a nasty wet fart, thinking no one would hear me since I work in a warehouse. My coworker did hear me, and replied, "WTF? Shots fired! Shots fired!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 466

You deserved it 738

Fake it til you make it

By freshman - 25/03/2011 23:05 - Canada

Today, to make my dorm neighbours think I'm popular, I blasted music and screamed at the top of my lungs so it sounded like I was having a party. My residence manager slapped me with a noise violation, and demanded to come in to make sure we weren't drinking. I had to explain why I was by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 161

You deserved it 60 225

Terrorized

By Whoopsie - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Worcester

Today, I woke up loudly screaming from a "night" terror. I say "night"; I was actually at my desk at work, in the middle of the day, surrounded by dozens of co-workers in their cubicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 086

You deserved it 11 394

By Anonymous - 12/02/2016 00:15 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while I was cleaning, listening to music and sometimes singing along, I heard a knock on my front door. I turned off the music and opened the door to the police, who stated they had to investigate reports of "repeated female screams" coming from my apartment. I'm a 23 year old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 909

You deserved it 2 432

rhcpgurl 18

Saturday 2 May 2015 14:42

And you thought screaming obscenities at the top of your lungs wouldn't scare and catch the attention of people within earshot of you?

Cads1 24

Saturday 2 May 2015 14:37

As does punching stupid people. However, that also involves the police.

Comments

muarif 19

Saturday 2 May 2015 14:52

Just pee on them to assert dominance!

tchopper1969 16

Saturday 2 May 2015 15:00

lmfao I've done the same thing. just never had the cops called (hence gotta love cowboy living)

MandyO 15

Saturday 2 May 2015 15:12

I hear deep breathing exercises can be helpful and won't get the cops called.

RedPillSucks 31

Saturday 2 May 2015 15:21

unless you do it into a phone... like I did...

32Levels 6

Sunday 3 May 2015 18:57

ROFL

powerkeep 24

Saturday 2 May 2015 15:27

Were you screaming at the lampposts?

irish_lad 16

Saturday 2 May 2015 15:44

Punch stupid people. That helps

swanheart 35

Saturday 2 May 2015 15:52

Well that outcome was in no way unforeseeable. What did you think would happen if you bellowed obscenities in public?

PePziNL 20

Sunday 3 May 2015 4:04

19: I'm sorry for going offtopic, but what is that hellspawn on your profile picture? Oo

swanheart 35

Sunday 3 May 2015 9:33

A cat with makeup on, clearly! :)

SystemofaBlink41 27

Monday 4 May 2015 5:43

This is what nightmares are made of.

DrummerWS 23

Saturday 2 May 2015 15:52

Next time, maybe go down a quiet road or something?

alexlots 20

Saturday 2 May 2015 16:13

Maybe next time try taking a few deep breaths

meleelastyles 10

Saturday 2 May 2015 16:16

Therapeutic muchly? :-D #StillWorthIt

unscrupulous 13

Saturday 2 May 2015 16:27

That's what the crazy people in Lifetime movies do.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Awkward Management Poopoo peepee Work Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Am I overreacting? Animals ADHD Dogs Transportation Dating Love Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy Confused AITA Parents

The Top

Today, my neighbour from across the road phoned me at work telling me there was a fire engine outside my house and a lot of smoke. I drove home in a panic, smashing a rear light on a post and getting flashed by a speed camera. It wasn't my house. The firemen were putting out a bonfire next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 855

You deserved it 6 629

Today, I found out that my boyfriend lost a bunch of money by buying some scam cryto crap linked to that "Hawk tuah" girl. Easiest break-up ever. FML

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The Top

Today, I learned that I was conceived on a public bus. FML

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You deserved it 4 860

Today, I told my parents I was pregnant but don’t know who the Dad is. My Mom said “that’s alright, I still don’t know who your dad is”. So apparently my father isn’t my real Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 868

You deserved it 1 207

Today, my drunk mother got into a fight with the lady at Krystal burger. Why? "Because the bitch said they aren't making special orders." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 929

You deserved it 2 602

Today, my mom found out that I've been having counselling behind her back for the past 4 years. I broke down in tears explaining everything. Her response was, "So you go and bitch about me behind my back?!" And she wonders why I'm depressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 744

You deserved it 5 630

Today, neither I nor any of my coworkers understand why our boss hates me enough that I feel the need to carry pepperspray on me at all times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 058

You deserved it 1 607

Today, while I was relaxing outside drinking a beer after a long day, a moth decided to fly right into my ear canal. I instinctively threw my hand up to swat it out. With the same hand holding the beer. I soaked the side of my face and down my ear. At least I got the bug out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 315