Miscellaneous: Today, I didn't even bother to turn my cellphone off in a movie...

By Rick - 22/05/2012 11:02 - United States - Spartanburg

Today, I didn't even bother to turn my cellphone off in a movie theater because I knew no one would text me or call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 071

You deserved it 4 815

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Same thing different taste

By Jakeok - 14/11/2014 00:04 - United States - Fraser

Today, I once again used my phone to get out of a conversation with someone, instead of actually talking to someone on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 407

You deserved it 7 635

By hello - 11/07/2010 00:57 - Jordan

Today, I was so bored at a family gathering that I pretended to be busy texting the whole time. I don't know what's worse, that I'm not close to anyone in my family, or that I have no one close enough to text to about such things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 336

You deserved it 8 818

By idk - 04/09/2015 14:15 - United Arab Emirates - Dubai

Today, I was getting ready to go out with my family. As I was putting my phone in my purse, my father told me I wouldn't need it because we were going to spend 'quality time' together. The entire time I was there, everyone was staring at their phone. I was the only one without one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 000

You deserved it 2 798

By :/ - 01/10/2013 10:18

Today, I purposely set my phone off in class to make it seem like I had friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 257

You deserved it 17 483

Shut up, bitch!

By Anonymous - 03/12/2021 19:59

Today, I went to see Ghostbusters: Afterlife. A family talked through the whole movie, phones on, watching YouTube videos, totally interrupting the experience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 131

You deserved it 159

Unknown number

By Whoisshe - 17/01/2020 01:00

Today, I gave my phone number to a guy at the movie theatre. I was excited to receive a text a few minutes later, sure enough when I unlocked my phone I had received a message from an unknown number. It was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 003

You deserved it 425

By hhhhhhhpeterwut - 19/02/2013 03:21 - United States - Bethesda

Today, as my lame excuse to not give a guy I met at a club my phone number, I told him I didn't have a cell phone. Guess what I checked when he asked me what time it was a few minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 358

You deserved it 54 816

You had one job!

By dgilbs - 12/11/2012 22:08 - United States - Grosse Pointe

Today, my friends and I went out to dinner. Being short on cash, I suggested a game where we put our phones in the center of the table and first to check their phone had to pay the bill. Our conversation died out, and fearful of having an awkward silence, I checked my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 422

You deserved it 55 318

By ForeverAlone - 15/09/2011 21:46 - Canada

Today, I was at my cousin's house. We weren't spending time together because he was always texting. After a couple of minutes, I got jealous. I played a ringtone on my cell, and "answered" it. I had a whole conversation with nobody in an attempt to seem somewhat more popular than a 10-year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 658

You deserved it 29 205

By emkaycutie - 29/03/2009 18:41 - United States

Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 206

You deserved it 200 046

I_Punch_Babies 7

Tuesday 22 May 2012 16:05

telemarketers dude. telemarketers

MeLuvBewbs 7

Tuesday 22 May 2012 16:06

Watch your phone alarm go off

Comments

maxtherussian 0

Tuesday 22 May 2012 16:39

Dude I'm the same way!! Hahaha

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:09

What.... How is that funny? That's sad!

itssosparkly 21

Tuesday 22 May 2012 18:08

Maybe that "hahaha" is actually the counterpart to tears of joy- the laugh of tragedy. For some reason it never really caught on...

rickiiix3 0

Tuesday 22 May 2012 16:47

Sucks to be you

Snafuusmc 12

Tuesday 22 May 2012 16:50

Well put. No trap here.

tjknight22 0

Tuesday 22 May 2012 16:56

You can text me i love texting 213 700 4072

j_cat187 19

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:01

Rule #1 : Never publicize your cellphone number.

tjknight22 0

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:01

You can txt me :) two one three 7 zero zero 40 seven 2

cellycrunk 16

Tuesday 22 May 2012 16:58

Sucks to be you.

tjknight22 0

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:02

You can txt me :) two one three 7 zero zero 40 seven 2

reddudeover 2

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:05

Why do you think we're on this site/app?

perdix 29

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:09

Wow, AT&T texts me once a month to tell me how much I owe them. You're not even cool enough to get hit up for cash?

mvems 13

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:16

And then it ends and the sad reality comes rushing back. Avengers are make believe and the 'no missed calls' is oh so real.

thisispointless 2

Tuesday 22 May 2012 17:30

I've done this twice

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex Jealousy Friends AITA Health Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Money Relatable Work DIY Parenting Kids Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Weird

The Top

Today, my roommate drew a giant red penis and scrotum on our refrigerator, using what he thought was a dry erase marker. It was a permanent marker. I just renewed my lease. I get to look at a red penis every day for the next year and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 226

You deserved it 5 153

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 511

You deserved it 84 244

The Top

Today, I applied and was accepted for a part-time network engineering position. Being contract work they asked me what I charge. I replied, "$12 an hour." After a look of surprise they accepted me for the position and said, "Our last guy charged $200 an hour, you're a bargain." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 623

You deserved it 34 919

Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 024

You deserved it 6 705

Today, my parents hassled me for wanting to get my tongue pierced, saying it was filthy, unprofessional, and degrading. About an hour later, my sister let slip that my nipple is pierced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 494

You deserved it 36 769

Today, my wife told me that I was a 5 on the scale of how well I flirted and romanced her, and that the guy before me was a 9. This was at the kitchen table in front of our kids. They thought it was hilarious, and told me I shouldn’t bother anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 697

You deserved it 197

Today, my mom texted me and asked what I was up to. In response, I joked, "Dancing on the dining room table, waving dad's Calvin Klein's in the air, and shooting bullets into her bedroom floor." Not only did the cops show up, but now I'm grounded for two weeks for being, "deceptively believable." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 137

You deserved it 6 234

Today, I met what I thought was a decent guy, via an introduction by my pregnant friend. She's dating his brother. The guy was dropping my friend and me off, but on the way out of the door he slapped her on the butt and smiled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 820

You deserved it 112

Same thing different taste

Shut up, bitch!

Unknown number

You had one job!

Top comments

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