By Fartini - 07/11/2016 06:47

Today, I discovered that alcohol makes me red-faced, extremely gassy and eager to discuss my virginity with everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks 11 258
You deserved it 2 437

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Stay away from tequila- I heard tequila makes your clothes fall off

"I came /this/ close to losing my virginity to somebody I met at a high school party, but they just didn't look enough like my father. Discuss."

Comments

You probably drank a beer or grain malt liquor l, or something either cheap or that doesn't agree with you. I can drink like anyone else, if not better, but give me one pabst or old miluakee, and I'll be ill for days!

Alcohol can make you do really stupid things.

Depending on your intent, this could be a good thing! Your noxious emissions will help you protect your virginity. Most guys wouldn't want to sleep with Ms. Fartini.

that's both a blessing and a curse. of course being a virgin is a GOOD thing, but the fact that you babbled about it may have saved it that night lol. often gents at a party AVOID THE VIRGIN because they tend to be clingy afterwards and most of the time a guy feels badly about that. you should have a slight memory of that first time! Or on the other hand that person could just be the annoying drunk. choose whatever explanation fits in your case and roll with that lol just avoid getting ridiculous drunk in the future and you'll be able to hold back that babbling :) GOOD LUCK OP

kujiens101 24

If alcohol makes you red-faced, that means your body cannot process the alcohol correctly and it is much much more dangerous for you to drink it.

randybryant799 20