Intimacy: Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant...

By Anonymous - 08/08/2011 07:16 - United States

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 921

You deserved it 4 011

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Same thing different taste

By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 518

You deserved it 4 961

By Anonymous - 27/11/2010 02:09 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend announced he has stopped wearing deodorant because he thinks his BO smells "manly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 107

You deserved it 3 309

By smellsgood - 13/03/2010 19:32 - United States

Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 421

You deserved it 11 384

By notsoproudfather - 01/02/2016 15:54 - India - Pune

Today, I walked in on my son's new habit. Sticking his finger up his ass, farting on it, and smelling it. Apparently, the scent is the purest then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 017

You deserved it 2 312

By Anonymous - 29/08/2019 22:05 - United States - Raleigh

Today, my mom proudly told me that she found the perfect thing to combat my B.O. Extra strength degreaser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 315

You deserved it 231

By someboody - 15/08/2015 16:50 - United States - Paso Robles

Today, I discovered that my mom bought roll on stick glue that looks quite a bit like deodorant. It was early in the morning and I was groggy. Long story short, I had to cut every one of my pit hairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 221

You deserved it 4 467

By anonymous - 15/12/2010 05:27

Today, I found out that the fat sweaty guy at my job frequently uses my rub-on deodorant and puts it back in my drawer after he's done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 360

You deserved it 3 174

By Oops - 27/08/2010 04:06 - United States

Today, I realized that it wasn't my science partner that smelled bad, it was me. How? The guy I have a crush on handed me a stick of deodorant and said, "Please use it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 863

You deserved it 37 066

The smell detective is on the case

By Anonymous - 28/01/2021 14:01 - Germany

Today, something smelled absolutely disgusting in the bathroom. Like cow shit and stinky beetles. I started sniffing around, because whatever it was, I had to find it and clean it up. That, however, proved difficult, because it turned out that smell was coming from the new soap my mom had bought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 501

You deserved it 190

Contagion

By Girlygal32 - 13/09/2020 08:02 - United States

Today, my mother chewed me out for not wearing deodorant and smelling of B.O. I was wearing plenty of deodorant. My shirt just smelled like my boyfriend, whom I'd been cuddling with earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 524

JiggaJayZ 16

Monday 8 August 2011 15:59

Nothing like the smell of musky ball sweat on your armpits all day

LolMoqz 10

Monday 8 August 2011 15:59

God Damn.

Comments

Glambert_lover 5

Tuesday 9 August 2011 5:29

That's disgusting!!

damadrappa 4

Tuesday 9 August 2011 5:43

Sucks

rcloca 10

Monday 29 August 2011 23:57

Hey ur the person who wrote the FML!

lyndz_20 8

Tuesday 9 August 2011 6:18

OMG! Your dad's plain nasty,sick!!!OMG! Your dad's plain nasty,sick!!!

Emili_ho69 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 7:01

I laughed so ******* hard I cried rollen on the floor.

TheyCallmeStacey 9

Tuesday 9 August 2011 7:38

Vomiting.....fing gross

filomiir 3

Tuesday 9 August 2011 7:45

WTF is wrong wit yall parents. I mean seriously! After reading all these FML moments..smh

maddie2015 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 7:48

Eww!

cheer4ever96 8

Tuesday 9 August 2011 8:02

Baby Jesus! You and your dad need to have a talk, no joke.

zodeezo 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 8:16

YAH GO FRESH SWEATY BALL SMELL

tstevenson 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 8:41

Hahaha that is now a favorite

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Embarrassing Work Accident Health Relatable Love LGBTQIA+ Annoying Inappropriate AITA My ex Relationship advice Animals Cute Cats Friends Transportation Awkward Cars Dogs Money Scams Miscellaneous Kids Family Drugs Public freakouts Cheating Sex Intimacy

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Today, I put my sexiest lingerie on, lit candles, put some sensual music on, and got my bed ready to surprise my boyfriend when he came home. I positioned myself in the sexiest pose possible. He came home and didn't come in my room for twenty minutes because of a football game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 128

You deserved it 6 971

Today, I felt like spicing up our marriage, so I thought I'd surprise my husband when he got home from work. I put on my sexiest teddy, lit some candles, and laid on the bed. He walked in the room, looked at me for a second, farted, then asked me what was for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 295

You deserved it 4 746

The Top

Today, I had to explain to my mother that she needed to buy a new mattress, telling her that we could hear the springs rattling every time she had sex with my dad. She then went on to explain that that is why they have sex on my bed when I'm not home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 643

You deserved it 177

Today, it was my second day of house-sitting. I was so out of my mind from not seeing people that I invited a bunch of friends over for dinner. I said I would pay for pizza and we could all hang out in the house. Even with an unsupervised house and free food, no one showed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 957

You deserved it 398

Today, a woman I’ve liked for years falsely claimed to be strung out on crystal meth rather than just turning me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 401

You deserved it 148

Today, I learned that my aunt, who lives with us, is using our chopsticks in her hair and putting them back in the utensil drawer without washing them. I'm the one that uses chopsticks the most. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 918

You deserved it 245

Today, I had to teach my younger brother to shave with a regular disposable razor because our dad uses an electric one and I'm the only other person in the family with enough facial hair to know how to use a razor. I probably would have been proud if I wasn't a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 919

You deserved it 2 887

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 727

You deserved it 45 418

Same thing different taste

The smell detective is on the case

Contagion

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