Intimacy: Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob.... - FML

By canucks_chick - 23/10/2011 05:45 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 657

You deserved it 21 052

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Same thing different taste

How romantic!

By dislocated - 14/02/2018 20:30

Today, my boyfriend dislocated my jaw by sitting on my face while trying to fart on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 709

You deserved it 870

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 27/05/2022 06:00

Spicy

Today, during sex with my new boyfriend, he gave me such an intense oral sex orgasm, I clenched my jaw and broke one of my back teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 214

You deserved it 315

By fatcheeks - 02/03/2010 16:58 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got all four of my wisdom teeth removed. I went to see my boyfriend for comfort because I was in so much pain. The first thing he asked me when I saw him with huge cheeks? When would be the next time I could give him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 476

You deserved it 4 185

By neckcrack - 07/09/2010 10:18 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. I got a little too enthusiastic during it, and wound up cracking my neck loudly, and had to stop while the pain settled down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 216

You deserved it 24 091

By 530gangsta - 25/04/2017 16:00

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 333

You deserved it 429

Come again

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 07:35

Spicy

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 994

You deserved it 62 530

By dom - 08/09/2010 06:53 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 316

You deserved it 33 857

By Anonymous - 30/10/2014 20:55 - United States - College Place

Spicy

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 007

You deserved it 27 435

By Anonymous - 26/08/2017 01:30

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was in the midst of giving me head when she got lockjaw. My dick was stuck inside her mouth as she bit down on it for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 475

You deserved it 768

By pleasedie - 07/05/2015 18:00 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Spicy

Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous and went to give him a blowjob, only to end up slipping and head-butting him in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 035

You deserved it 6 802

Next

Top comments

JTthePurpleNinja 5

Sunday 23 October 2011 12:06

Was it that big ? Holy shit.

NitroTonicsFML 4

Sunday 23 October 2011 12:18

I'm just gonna say it...that blows.

Comments

stevenmx86 7

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:34

I'll bet that's a story he'll tell for the rest of his life, "I am so large. Proof? A girl once dislocated her jaw trying to give me a bj. No lie."

fruitloopjenna 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:36

what a champppp!

Pinkfreak43 5

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:47

Wow well that's hard to explain to the parents!! I'm sorry

haileypaige123 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 15:59

He must have a really big dick. You should be happy :D

yaneliz1994 16

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:02

Honestly why do females do that it's nasty they pee from there

kristen69 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:15

Everyone prefers their own thing. Some girls like it while others have same opinion u do.

simplylost643 0

Monday 24 October 2011 6:00

109, If people stopped putting things in or around holes involving questionable fluids, the human species would die out. ******** just ensure the man will stick around to care for the offspring. Hope this helps.

8bitjerrio 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:02

you must have been, er, really into it.

CoryX 9

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:02

The true meaning of determination doh, she put the team on her back!

alival 12

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:05

How do u do that???

kcalio 1

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:06

IVe done that. Hurts like he'll. Now my jaws ****** up for life

thekrammer 5

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:06

You must have been working hard

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The Top

Today, as I was walking home, three burly men suddenly began to approach me. Thinking they were going to mug me, I reached for my pocketknife and said, "Stay away, I have a knife." Turns out they just wanted directions to an ice cream shop for their daughters, who were now bawling their eyes out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 057

You deserved it 55 282

Today, my husband returned from a 6-week business trip. During that time, I put myself on a very strict diet/exercise regimen so I could surprise him with a hefty weight loss. He took one look at me and demanded to know who I was fucking on the side. Yeah, because that’s the only reason I lost weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 152

You deserved it 232

The Top

Today, my friend told me men can't be trusted. I told her that wasn't true; I have my husband's password to his email but I never check it because I trust him. She bet me he was doing something bad, and to prove her wrong I looked. Turns out he has been cheating on me for 8 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 917

You deserved it 5 508

Today, I have severe back pain that is only relieved by lying flat on my bed. I also have acid reflux that is only prevented by sitting straight up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 198

You deserved it 2 932

Today, I wore my cheerleading uniform to my boyfriend's house. He was a nerd in high school and mentioned a fantasy about hooking up with a cheerleader. I started acting sassy and a little mean, figuring he would enjoy a more realistic experience. Apparently not, because he started to cry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 816

You deserved it 51 819

Today, I asked my husband to be a little more responsible, pick up after himself, and spend a little less. I earn more than he does, so it's usually my money that he splurges. He has gone on a non-stop tantrum for the past 5 hours, giving me the cold shoulder, and shouting at me. What have I gotten myself into? FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 195

Today, the neighbors called the cops on us because they heard a series of loud screams. No, no one was being murdered, but my mom found one of my socks in the laundry room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 193

Today, I found out my cat and my roommate's dog are apparently lesbians who are into what is basically bestiality to us humans. Despite both being female (and fixed), his dog tried to hump my cat, and my cat didn't resist at all. Trying to get his dog off my cat took way more effort than it should have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 112