Health: Today, I drove a friend to the emergency room because he thought...

By alephnull - 02/02/2011 21:07 - Canada

Today, I drove a friend to the emergency room because he thought he had appendicitis. While sitting in the waiting room, I got puked on by a child. My friend's diagnosis? Gas. So he also farted all the way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 111

You deserved it 3 134

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/05/2015 13:51 - United States - Pottstown

Today, I thought it would be funny to fart next to my brother in the car. Apparently, his carsickness is exacerbated by strong smells. I now know what it feels like to have lap full of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 637

You deserved it 38 971

By lambeaster - 20/01/2016 14:27 - United States - Washington

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 825

You deserved it 3 714

By babs - 07/05/2013 19:07 - United States

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 170

You deserved it 4 751

Better out than in

By Anonymous - 20/05/2020 02:00

Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 906

You deserved it 413

By sadddddd - 11/09/2011 01:54 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 881

You deserved it 3 270

By Anonymous - 29/06/2014 04:16 - United States

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 699

You deserved it 4 019

By Anonymous - 16/07/2009 01:53 - United States

Today, my friend got drunk. He always pukes when he gets drunk, but I decided to drive him home anyway. He didn't puke the whole ride. We arrived at his house and he got out. Right as I was about to drive away he stumbled back to my car because he forgot his wallet. He grabbed it and puked on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 427

You deserved it 6 089

By Anonymous - 19/07/2014 17:39 - United States - Cape Coral

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 569

You deserved it 41 812

On the scene

By fire1 - 25/10/2011 04:30 - United States

Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 317

You deserved it 2 327

Quick Stop

By poopy pants - 08/04/2013 01:47 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 375

You deserved it 8 736

lugnutz 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 1:20

pleasant sight to smell?

sweet_candy_ 17

Thursday 3 February 2011 1:10

Awwww you're a true friend op. I wish I had a friend like you :)

Comments

fortunefades 3

Thursday 3 February 2011 5:24

was his gas enough to get you guys back home? (;

Bosia 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 6:18

Traveling at the speed of gas? I need to try that!

calenzelon 6

Thursday 3 February 2011 5:26

gas-bag

calenzelon 6

Thursday 3 February 2011 5:27

fartblossom

xGraycloud 4

Thursday 3 February 2011 5:46

wow, ur friend owes you BIG. (;

brianjman14 22

Thursday 3 February 2011 5:56

Love the gas, Meg!!! LOVE IT!!!!!!

MyChemical_fml 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 8:10

Is that a neck or 4 books stacked beside each other?

juwood 7

Thursday 3 February 2011 6:19

I've had this happen to me before. The docs ended up taking my appendix out anyway, resulting in a pretty good scar on my stomach.

Privations_fml 3

Thursday 3 February 2011 6:56

One less illness to worry about tho. Might as well have had it taken out while it *wasn't* a threat.

lifesluck 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 6:20

Before I even finished reading this FML , some instinct screamed this was an Alberta OP! Means nothing I know. Just thought it was interesting to point out. :)