Love: Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

By fart - 27/11/2014 15:13 - United States - Houghton Lake

Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 121

You deserved it 7 283

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Same thing different taste

My body hates me

By HappilyNeverAfter - 18/09/2014 03:14 - Canada - Port Perry

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 846

You deserved it 5 285

By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 07:23 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 918

You deserved it 3 238

By tmac05 - 13/11/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 843

You deserved it 3 014

Nervous

By amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 728

You deserved it 715

By nameless - 12/07/2009 06:45 - United States

Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 286

You deserved it 11 865

By Anonymous - 01/03/2018 19:30 - United States - Greenville

Today, while wearing a sexy pair of undies for my partner and taking him out on a nice dinner, I trusted a fart walking from the car to the restaurant and shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 048

You deserved it 1 749

By oops - 04/03/2016 21:28 - United States - Mankato

Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 048

You deserved it 3 420

By oops - 18/05/2009 04:17 - United States

Today, while I was waitressing, I bent down to pick up a menu and accidentally farted, really loud, at my table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 501

You deserved it 10 829

Bad timing, dude

By Anonymous - 24/02/2021 07:59 - Australia

Today, in the middle of asking my girlfriend to marry me, I sneezed so hard that I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 150

By Anonymous - 13/08/2015 01:18 - United States - Kingman

Today, I let out a huge fart during a job interview. I was the one conducting the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 414

You deserved it 5 203

ComoEsJuan 24

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:16

Breaking the ice by breaking wind. I'll take notes.

fuckyourlifeOP 25

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:16

That stinks!

Comments

brook823 24

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:18

Well did she go to dinner with you?

IvyRizzzzoli 25

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:20

Well if she liked you I'm sure she wouldn't mind.....it was probably embarrassing though

wvcheesehead 13

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:20

You should have acted as if though it was a gunshot and that you had been hit. Women love to play nurse.

poose_d0g 7

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:26

Does it really work??

WasabiMars 21

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:30

Well if you guys hit it off you'd definitely have funny answers when your friends and/or family asks, "So how did you ask her out?"

rareawesomeness 22

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:31

So, did she say yes?

kjmw89 1

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:52

I done the same thing when I asked my now husband out 11 years ago

TheNiceOne 20

Thursday 27 November 2014 20:01

What'd she say?

twistedtwincity 17

Thursday 27 November 2014 20:28

I shat my self whilst brea kind up with a girl

smile_because 13

Thursday 27 November 2014 20:33

Hope she has a sense of humor!

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The Top

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 551

You deserved it 49 637

Today, I asked my boyfriend to spend the night at my house because my dad would be working out of town, and once the rest of the house left I thought it'd be sweet if he snuck in my room and slept with me. His reply was, "Why bother? You're on your period, it's not like we can do anything." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 270

You deserved it 14 171

The Top

Today, my math teacher decided to use my acne as an example of symmetry in front of the whole class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 761

You deserved it 4 091

Today, I dropped my phone in the bathtub and had to spend the whole night trying to make the speakers work again. On top of that, while I was cleaning the bedding I discovered that my bed had grown a black mold farm and I have been sleeping on it for God knows how long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 320

You deserved it 832

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old boyfriend why it is not okay to pee in the pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 977

You deserved it 5 358

Today, my husband is very liberal. Normally this is a good thing, but the people across the street have put out a TRUMP sign and he's gone nuts. He built a massive HARRIS/WALZ sign in our front yard and is hassling the rest of the neighborhood about it. Half of them are putting out TRUMP signs out of spite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 445

Today, I thought a cute guy was checking out my ass, so I cheekily bent over a little to give him an eyeful. He walked over to a shop assistant, pointed at me and left. The assistant then informed me, “Miss, you’ve torn your trousers, your knickers are visible, and, um, apparently you have a skid mark.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 1 218

Today, I called complaints for my internet provider because, again, it's slowed to a crawl that would make dial-up laugh. They said that I live in a remote area, so maintenance is difficult. When I pointed out I only live ten minutes from the nearest city, they responded by saying they're my only option, so tough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 895

You deserved it 108

Same thing different taste

My body hates me

Nervous

Bad timing, dude

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