Health: Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person...

By thatonesilentkidinclass - 04/05/2013 08:11 - Philippines - San Juan

Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 720

You deserved it 12 135

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Same thing different taste

Work out

By anon - 20/03/2015 21:43 - United States - Arlington

Today, I decided I would actually make use of my apartment complex's exercise equipment. My routine consisted of one mile on the treadmill, and 15 minutes on the toilet followed by 10 minutes of lying in the fetal position on my bath mat. Great core workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 543

You deserved it 4 398

By JenniWearsPrada - 20/04/2011 08:27

Today, I decided to start my exercise video routine. It's an African dance workout DVD. Just as I felt confident and motivated about getting in shape, I realized that my window was wide open and my neighbors were getting a front row seat to me waving my arms in the air like an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 966

You deserved it 26 279

Take it easy

By Endrit Begolli - 27/06/2023 00:02 - Albania

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. I was so out of shape that I couldn't even finish my warm-up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 607

You deserved it 248

Knackered and shattered

By Out of Shape - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Egypt

Today, I decided to start exercising. I almost passed out five minutes into the warm up, and couldn't even stand in the shower afterwards. I'm only 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 124

You deserved it 35 886

Having fun over there?

By Anonymous - 07/09/2024 00:00 - South Africa - Durban

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in quite a while. I was feeling pretty good about myself until I realized I'd been on the elliptical machine for twenty minutes without having actually turned it on. I was just moving the pedals and wondering why I wasn’t getting tired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 306

Baby steps

By Anonymous - 16/11/2024 21:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I started doing cardio at my local gym with a basic exercise bike because doing weightlifting by itself wasn't having an effect on my weight. Since I'm out of shape, I did 15 minutes instead of the standard 30. I had to stop at 10 minutes because my legs were so sore they nearly gave out on me when I stood up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 178

You deserved it 75

New day, same shit

By PickYourselfUp - 06/10/2014 03:17 - United States - Chesapeake

Today, was the day I would turn my life around and start losing weight. I went outside for my first run and said, "I got this!" I confidently stepped forward, the first symbolic steps to my new life. In the anticipation, I forgot my porch had steps. I face-planted on my driveway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 907

You deserved it 8 660

Out of shape

By Anonymous - 05/09/2011 04:38 - Canada

Today, I decided to work out. Being too embarrassed to run in public, I instead ran in circles in my basement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 723

You deserved it 15 183

By Anonymous - 18/01/2015 16:34 - Ireland

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 968

You deserved it 20 686

By fat and alone - 05/06/2014 04:11 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I figured I needed to go on a diet when I discovered I could make farting noises with my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 202

You deserved it 18 119

DocBastard 38

Saturday 4 May 2013 16:02

You're going to be a huge hit at the gym. I can see it now...The Gasmaster.

dr_snow_bear 29

Saturday 4 May 2013 16:02

A small start is better than no start. Good luck!

Comments

gunnerblaster 21

Sunday 5 May 2013 4:37

Keep it up, dude! Getting in shape and staying healthy is an admirable goal! If you find yourself lacking motivation, seek out a partner to help keep pace with! Don't give it up!

needsagf14 12

Sunday 5 May 2013 4:54

It's ok just never come up with a reason to stop

Bcfrmkc816 17

Sunday 5 May 2013 5:09

Hey we'll at least you are trying unlike some if who can't. And don't worry about the gas a lot of people do it when they exercise. Hope it don't keep you from losing the weight and to continue working out. Good luck

WonkeyDonkey 10

Sunday 5 May 2013 5:38

Woohoo you're jet propelled ;)

chinagirl3343 8

Sunday 5 May 2013 5:57

That's ok! Don't worry about it. I ummm I do yoga... It happens to all of us.... Just don't give up... Lol

liverpooly44 8

Sunday 5 May 2013 9:02

That's awesome that you are trying to work out. You will lose weight in no time. Just try do it outdoors though....

imaxsean 3

Sunday 5 May 2013 9:22

You look smaller already now.

BrimfullOfAsher 20

Sunday 5 May 2013 9:58

Been there, done that, had to use the t-shirt as a gas mask. The good news is that as your body gets used to exercising the gas becomes less of a problem.

ex_stripper_jk 20

Sunday 5 May 2013 11:18

First, way to go! You should be proud. Secondly, c'mon that is too funny. I hope you giggled a little bit. Gotta have a sense of humor about yourself.