Intimacy: Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything...

By whyeventry? - 02/08/2013 04:39 - United States - Neenah

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 156

You deserved it 12 722

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By displeased - 05/04/2012 06:47 - United States - Candler

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 786

You deserved it 3 565

By Toomuchisoutofcontrol - 21/01/2017 08:00

Today, I was going down on my boyfriend. I'm usually in control and do my own thing. He tried taking control and I ended throwing up on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 588

You deserved it 1 012

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 163

You deserved it 4 026

By Darcy - 26/10/2011 06:58 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 570

You deserved it 4 582

Fond memories

By -_- - 13/08/2011 00:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 837

You deserved it 4 637

Sensitive snowflake

By onepussytwopussy - 07/03/2014 19:47 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 422

You deserved it 26 486

The Great Pretender

By CJune24 - 22/10/2014 21:24 - United Kingdom - Huddersfield

Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 539

You deserved it 5 452

By thisblows - 16/03/2011 16:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 838

You deserved it 8 748

Alexa, play "Absolute Beginners" by David Bowie

By Anonymous - 29/07/2023 15:00

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try “things” while under the influence. I suggested he go down on me; he thought about it for a second and then said, “I would, but I don’t want to get scared when I take a look.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 273

By MulticoloredSlug - 13/10/2016 10:57 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 430

You deserved it 1 416

darth1 18

Friday 2 August 2013 11:59

Honestly that sounds like a fun way to end things.

mimiminx 23

Friday 2 August 2013 12:07

You had to 'finally talk' your boyfriend into going down on you and now he's too scared to have sex with you after rolling off the bed?! He sounds like a bit of a pussy!

Comments

kiroarous 9

Saturday 3 August 2013 22:54

Leave the couple alone, ur boyfriend is not a pussy, it's just gonna take some time to get used to. Next time do it on the floor.

81arctic 4

Monday 5 August 2013 3:44

Hahahaha hahahaha the words "crocodile style" just made me blast iced coffee through my nose. Amazing.

Damion_Laverne 6

Monday 5 August 2013 20:29

You trapped his head with your teeth!

coryking06 4

Tuesday 6 August 2013 13:40

Well of course he's scared you tried to smoother him with your private area

rtosi 2

Thursday 22 August 2013 4:41

I love it when my girlfriend grips my head with her thighs

B_miller22 1

Wednesday 4 September 2013 0:22

That's awesome

Toshido 10

Monday 30 December 2013 21:01

Sorry, but if you have to "talk" your boyfriend into going down on you...Either something's wrong with your"boy"friend or your vag. You shouldn't have to talk him into eating a treat.

sammyjo06 14

Friday 14 February 2014 7:32

All of us do it. He should take it as a compliment that your thighs moved involuntarily. When my thighs gripped the head of the guy going down on me, he kind of just absent-mindedly pried them back apart lol XD.