Intimacy: Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend...

By Dickhead - 25/11/2011 15:02 - Lebanon

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 541

You deserved it 62 311

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Same thing different taste

Carrier pigeon

By Anonymous - 10/03/2022 12:00

Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 020

You deserved it 90

By anonymous - 08/01/2015 19:10 - United States - Noblesville

Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 129

You deserved it 3 368

Busted

By Stacy - 21/03/2009 00:43 - United States

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in and there was a note that said, "Stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 801

You deserved it 121 804

By Anonymous - 19/06/2011 05:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a Post-it note on my locker that said, "Consider yourself dumped." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 824

You deserved it 4 683

Noise annoys

By Anonymous - 10/08/2012 05:29 - Europe

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 743

You deserved it 18 273

By Andrew - 23/10/2012 19:12 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 486

You deserved it 11 464

By useyourownbed - 18/09/2012 20:06 - United States - Byron

Today, my sister walked into my room, saying her boyfriend "forgot something." She then reached under my bed and pulled out a pair of boxers and a condom wrapper. Her response to my disgust was, "My bed was dirty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 908

You deserved it 2 496

Considerate

By BadLuckLad - 22/10/2014 22:38 - United Kingdom - Portsmouth

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 387

You deserved it 3 890

By Anonymous - 31/07/2012 03:36 - United States - Chicago

Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 450

You deserved it 42 553

Gettin' some

By Username - 01/05/2011 08:20 - United States

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriend's dog. After several trips around the block, and plenty of strange looks, I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 507

You deserved it 46 408

indistructo 3

Friday 25 November 2011 18:59

you just got buuuuuuuuurrrrned! lol best joke ever

Glitterhinoceros 14

Friday 25 November 2011 19:02

It'd be really cool if you could fit your whole body into that be completely casual while talking to your girlfriend

Comments

amanchan 0

Tuesday 29 November 2011 3:00

Could be worse she couldve burned all your clothes too and then you really would HAVE to dress like a dick

SupraHippo 6

Tuesday 29 November 2011 5:08

BURN.STRAIGHT BURN.

neander 8

Wednesday 30 November 2011 1:42

She's a keeper! What a great sense of humor she has.

Nando55 0

Friday 2 December 2011 16:47

since he started acting like a dick he might as well **** himself

bellielovie 2

Saturday 3 December 2011 2:34

U mad bro?

Jacke963 6

Monday 5 December 2011 14:37

Haha snap! That's so funny ^^

eatpraylovee44 0

Friday 9 December 2011 19:27

Damn, son, she told you.

cantdobetter 2

Saturday 10 December 2011 1:02

169- that was the stupidest thing I've ever heard

thisguy2112 0

Sunday 22 January 2012 9:12

should have given her a Hooker dress and since your acting like a ***** might as well dress like one OP

TheTerenity 9

Sunday 4 March 2012 21:01

Why so many YDI? That's her opinion...

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my parents took my to hospital with headache, cramps, sweats and tremors. The doctor thought I was an drug addict in withdrawal, which, after some questions, turns out I am. I gave up fizzy soda last week and am in total withdrawal from caffeine and all the other addictive chemicals in soda. FML

I agree, your life sucks 423

You deserved it 187

Ahoy ship's boys and girls ! Today we're heading to France. Be ready to face rain, storm and beer because Lille is welcoming us, and believe me, it's not Los Angeles. Do you all have your raincoats? -Bonjour ! First of all, present yourself ma jol...

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 16

The Top

Today, apparently my parents called 911 because I wasn't answering their phone calls, so they thought something was wrong. I was in the bathroom and didn't bring my phone, so I wouldn't distract myself and ended up sitting there forever. Looks like that wasn't the right choice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 970

You deserved it 135

Today, I went on a date for the first time in ages, only to realize that the guy I was seeing chose to take us to a specific restaurant in able to stalk his ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 321

You deserved it 159

Today, for my birthday, someone left a big bottle of mouth wash on my desk with a big bow on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 348

You deserved it 18 077

Today, was the first time my boyfriend slept over. He was hard, so I woke him up by whispering in his ear, "If you could get me to do anything right now, what would it be?" His response, "Can you get me a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream?" He was hard, for ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 457

You deserved it 14 930

Today, while working as a carhop at Sonic, my roller skates ran over some gravel and I fell, causing me to drop a tray of food. I found out later that one of the customers had deliberately done that to see if I would trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 443

You deserved it 2 810

Today, I went to a professional development meeting with my boss to discuss how I'm doing and what we want from each other next year. I left without a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 999

You deserved it 928