Transportation: Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It...

By Anonymous - 02/07/2011 04:46 - United States

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 859

You deserved it 3 575

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Same thing different taste

By Mustang - 05/08/2010 01:13 - United States

Today, some jerk super glued leaves and a note onto my car's front windshield. Not only is it directly in front of the driver's seat and makes it nearly impossible to drive, but it won't come off. What makes it worse? I was spending the night at a friend's house and the note was meant for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 127

You deserved it 2 608

By raven_of_azarath - 29/07/2019 02:00

Today, I found a spider in my car the size of my hand. Help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 161

By Anonymous - 30/10/2010 23:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked outside to find someone had egged my house and smashed a pumpkin onto my car. I later discovered that the perpetrator was my own 8 year old son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 010

You deserved it 5 516

Prank culture has gone too far

By duck me! - 02/03/2023 04:00

Today, some asshole superglued ten rubber ducks to my car while I was at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 854

You deserved it 101

By Baegel - 02/03/2016 01:52 - United States - Havertown

Today, my psycho ex defaced my car. She didn't key it or slash my tires. She posted "TRUMP 2016" bumper stickers all over it. I don't know what glue they use, but it's been 2 hours and I haven't gotten any of them off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 904

You deserved it 2 371

Territorial Pissings

By El Camino - 25/11/2010 21:01 - United States

Today, I parked in a different lot because the one I usually park in was full. When I came back later, a bumper sticker was stuck to the windshield that said, "INCONSIDERATE F***, DON'T PARK HERE AGAIN!" To make matters worse, it was stuck on with a special type of glue, so it can't be removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 388

You deserved it 5 073

By Steffi3 - 14/05/2016 16:29 - United States

Today, there was a spider in my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 69

By ColdMN - 03/02/2011 17:02 - United States

Today, I trying to scrape the ice off my car, but wasn't having much luck. Frustrated, I kicked a clump off from the bumper. The clump didn't budge, but the entire front quarter panel fell off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 358

You deserved it 11 161

By wils - 24/07/2010 09:49 - United States

Today, after work, I peeled a parking ticket off my windshield. It was so hot that the ink from the ticket made a stamp on my windshield. Now I have a permanent reminder staring me in the face wherever I drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 645

You deserved it 7 899

Troll level 3000

By really?! - 22/03/2020 06:30

Today, I found my car with its front end smashed in. The offender was nowhere to be seen, but had left a helpful note that stated, "Sorry about your car but you can go fuck yourself because you will never find me. Muwahahaha!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 914

You deserved it 145

DKjazz 20

Saturday 2 July 2011 12:12

3+ points for originality. Not your average prankster here, no sir.

AffrontedFetus 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 12:02

Stick on a few more and you could pass off as a pretty good pimp.

Comments

CigBock 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 16:44

Sounds like your in a bit of a "sticky" situation.

stacianichole 2

Saturday 2 July 2011 16:46

Super glue would not bond a pumpkin to a car with so much strength that it couldn't be removed. quit whining, pull it off, get a sponge and scrub the pumpkin bits off of your car.

tstevenson 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 16:47

WTF did u think would happen u ******* idiot?!

RavenNight 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 16:48

honestly i would think thts funny and drive around. but seriously u might wanna get hot water and try to get the glue to melt

brookie_bear 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 17:00

i didnt even know pumkins were "in season" hmm. you learn something new everyday(:

Iceman225 11

Tuesday 25 June 2013 19:38

You are pretty dumb. There is a perfect time to grow something. Once it ripens, that's the season.

quadder 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 17:03

meguairs mist and shine, and if there is still residu than give the affected area a detailing clay

Klug_fml 7

Saturday 2 July 2011 17:11

Yay for pumpkins.

iWantSprite 12

Saturday 2 July 2011 17:18

Haha steroid pumpkin.

RokNRoll11 9

Saturday 2 July 2011 17:22

ooooooooooooo dang

idongeyo 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 17:31

seriously who would do that?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 804

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 349

You deserved it 8 250

The Top

Today, I was in the toilet when somebody started banging on the door loudly. I panicked and immediately cleaned my self and opened the door. As I opened the door, my brother vomited all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 996

You deserved it 2 788

Today, I received an email invitation to a dating web site. It was from my father-in-law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 210

You deserved it 3 237

Today, after waiting a year, I asked a coworker who I like to work out at the gym with me. She said yes. I figured this would be the perfect place to show off my body and impress her. In every exercise we did, she lifted more weights than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 2 769

Today, I made huge pot of curry, adhering almost exactly to my proven and delicious recipe. It tasted completely bland, even with all the spices. I kept adding salt, until it tasted bland and oversalted at the same time. I think either the salt is broken or my taste buds are. FML

I agree, your life sucks 670

You deserved it 800

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 407

You deserved it 48 775

Today, after two months of unemployment, I got a call from a marketing firm offering me an interview for an entry-level position. While Googling the company, I discovered it's a scam. I graduated college in 3 years with a 3.5 GPA, and the only interview I can get is at a fake company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 130

You deserved it 5 015

Same thing different taste

Prank culture has gone too far

Territorial Pissings

Troll level 3000

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