Miscellaneous: Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had...

By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 521

You deserved it 4 962

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Morning conversation

By Anonymous - 15/03/2021 08:01

Today, I went into the bathroom only to discover my dad on the pot. “Oh, sorry”, I say and turn to leave. His reply, “Oh I don’t mind. Just having a shit here.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 197

By fugachumi - 07/08/2011 08:08 - United States

Today, I discovered that every morning at around 3:00 my dad takes a monumental dump in my bathroom. When I confronted him about it he denied it. He still does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 838

You deserved it 3 514

Let that sink in

By vegasman20002 - 18/05/2024 06:00 - United States - Garden City

Today, my father-in-law shat himself in my bathroom and tried to flush some of the evidence down my sink. Sink that I'd just cleaned up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 62

By mikey51 - 10/03/2012 01:56 - Australia

Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 632

You deserved it 41 589

Never going to live this down

By Anonymous - 01/09/2023 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I went up to take a shower. I typically go to the bathroom first, I take a mega dump, then flush the toilet. Not only wouldn't the toilet flush but I found out my parents only keep one plunger on hand. It was in the downstairs bathroom. My dad came upstairs and plunged the toilet while I stood there naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 280

By Anonymous - 11/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Dekalb

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 095

You deserved it 3 061

By Anonymous - 02/06/2011 14:10 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came to visit me. By visit I mean he arrived, took a huge smelly dump and left. This is the first time I've seen my dad in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 3 075

By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 717

You deserved it 2 759

By whatchagonnado - 24/03/2013 07:35 - Canada - Victoria

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 953

You deserved it 8 897

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 295

You deserved it 7 527

cessily 8

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:11

I happen to be taking a crap right now

captainbj2 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:13

who pays for the bathroom? I think it is HIS bathroom....

Comments

Thelective_Lisp 5

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:23

Take a shit on his chest. You two will bond.

scrapmetal58 9

Tuesday 5 July 2011 23:58

Your comment does not go with your photo.

stacianichole 2

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:23

BFD. do you need a copy of 'everyone poops?'

gertyygirly 4

Tuesday 5 July 2011 23:28

I love that book! Taught me all I need to know in life.

mrbattleman 10

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:26

that seems reasonable

simply_improper 1

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:27

Your father is a very wise man

Lexi_Ray 5

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:33

atleast he had a decent reason

DarkHelmet 10

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:34

it's his house. in a man's house every bathroom I his bathroom!

RaineLee 5

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:35

How inconsiderate. Go spray perfume all over, I think that'll help. Or not.

angelsara91 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:37

stupid FML.

lovelydarlings 6

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:45

My dad does that too... sigh...

MidnightXRaver 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:49

Smart guy :D

Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Transportation Cars ADHD Work Mental health Ironic Vacation Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Kids Annoying Covid Health Cute Shopping Coworkers Dogs Animals Videos Photography Art Sex Intimacy Exhausted Money

The Top

Today, as punishment for a prank, my girlfriend has banned all forms of sex, kissing, or touching for the foreseeable future. She’s also started stripping as soon as she gets home and walking around in just her thong, or sometimes even completely naked, just to make my suffering worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 713

You deserved it 2 518

Today, I had a mental breakdown. Many things have been going completely wrong in my life, and I finally decided to let my boyfriend know about it. After about an hour of explaining and pouring my heart out, his response was, "I think we were better off as friends." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 336

You deserved it 5 516

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me that I don't have a "grippy vagina" after he slipped out for the third time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 436

You deserved it 1 765

Today, I was at the airport about to leave for my business trip. In the restroom, I put my purse on the edge of the sink and got my lipstick out. I leaned closer to apply my lipstick and my open purse fell into the sink, triggering the automatic faucet, filling my purse with water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 762

You deserved it 10 018

Today, my boyfriend's mum yelled at me for, "nagging Stephen to get married when he isn't ready." I mentioned marriage once. At my sister's wedding. When prompted by my grandmother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 586

You deserved it 329

Today, my English professor bragged to my entire class about how good my essay was. He kept on saying great things about it for the duration of class. To my surprise, he'd given me a C-. When I asked why, his only response was: "I'm a hard grader." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 800

You deserved it 1 536

Today, I got ready to stay over at my boyfriend's house. I brought food, new lingerie, and I got a bikini wax. I did stay overnight, but I was holding a bucket for him because he had gastroenteritis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 702

You deserved it 2 871

Today, I just found out that my ex girlfriend is gonna be my step mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 351

You deserved it 4 629

Same thing different taste

Morning conversation

Let that sink in

Never going to live this down

Top comments

Comments