Intimacy: Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student...

By SleepyKirsty - 09/06/2009 13:36 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student flat are. They are so thin in fact, that I can hear the creepy guy next door say my full name over and over again very slowly whilst masturbating rigorously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120 749

You deserved it 5 717

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Same thing different taste

By Buzzie - 02/09/2010 21:09 - United States

Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 558

You deserved it 14 373

The sound of silence

By hearing too much - 03/11/2019 02:00

Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 780

You deserved it 226

By kazmatazz - 17/05/2012 10:33 - Oman

Today, I found out that the extremely attractive man that works in my building can hear everything I say about him through the paper-thin walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 531

You deserved it 9 099

By edwinduarte1 - 13/09/2010 06:49 - France

Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 197

You deserved it 3 309

MY EARS! MY EARS!

By ashbeat - 01/01/2013 15:20 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 634

You deserved it 4 400

Vicariously

By Cate - 05/11/2009 10:25 - Australia

Today, I've had no sleep. Why? Because my housemate has a new girlfriend and the walls are too thin. After round three of them shagging, I was exhausted from holding my breath each time the new girlfriend screamed. I also realised that was the closest I'd been to sex in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 568

You deserved it 3 411

Sort yourselves out

By Anonymous - 01/07/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 95

YELP!

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 12:00 - United States - Brookline

Today, my new neighbours moved in. I had always thought my bedroom wall was soundproof, because my old neighbours never complained about my loud night terrors. Turns out they were just stone deaf. The new ones can hear everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 136

By idontwanttoknow - 16/06/2013 11:37 - United States

Today, I heard my roommate moaning my name in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 116

You deserved it 6 916

By Steph - 21/06/2009 12:05 - Bulgaria

Today, I realized how much I hate my apartment. Not only can I hear my creepy upstairs neighbor having sex with random hookers every few night, I can also hear him everytime he takes a shit. I honestly don't know which is worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 441

You deserved it 3 281

WateryAsh 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 20:04

O.O

bigotcretin 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 20:04

LOL and fyl for sure but dont be surprised about how often guys jerk off about and what about, you were just a little more aware about it happening

Comments

Jojo0607 1

Monday 12 March 2012 1:47

Ew,ew, and ew

lilny5613 10

Monday 2 April 2012 4:48

Burst in and sy "you called?"

writergirl23 19

Monday 2 April 2012 5:47

Lock the door from now on. Sleep with the windows shut. Get a boyfriend and have loud sex so he can hear, every night.

babysittingfail 0

Monday 2 July 2012 20:47

MOVE

Briiyahh 7

Thursday 26 July 2012 1:00

Well atleast now you know your attractive?

AwesomeSkySky 1

Thursday 2 August 2012 0:53

Maybe its someone else?? (she says optimisticaly..(

yzzami 17

Saturday 19 January 2013 16:18

You must have a really unique name since no one else he would know has it

shinedown00 4

Tuesday 16 April 2013 22:28

You should yell I can hear you you sick ****

anubisismylife 9

Sunday 5 May 2013 15:01

Move out. Seriously.

Sober1128 9

Saturday 11 May 2013 5:19

Scream "I can hear you." And then "Stop dreaming. Never gonna happen."

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my boss wanted to promote me to a managerial position. I declined the position, saying that I don't think I'm ready and experienced enough for that role. I was then fired instead for not accepting the promotion. I was fired for being honest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 729

You deserved it 26 540

Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 126

You deserved it 13 555

The Top

Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 290

Today, I was called handsome. Too bad it was coming from a trashed homeless lady, who then went on to tell me that she likes my lips and wants to rape me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 459

You deserved it 4 201

Today, my boyfriend dislocated my jaw by sitting on my face while trying to fart on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 708

You deserved it 868

Today, my husband told me he was going to search from store to store in order to find my birthday gift. What was he really doing? His girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 058

You deserved it 4 181

Today, I received an unexpected package from my mother. It contained my cat's ashes. Apparently he died 3 weeks ago and she thought this was the best way to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 776

You deserved it 2 797

Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 223

You deserved it 244