Health: Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and... - FML

By fatteningmeup - 26/05/2011 14:24 - United States

Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 426

You deserved it 3 795

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By mynameislor - 09/02/2010 14:26 - Canada

Today, my mum was saying she needs to gain weight because she was underweight according to her doctor. She then said she's going to eat like me in order to gain more weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 238

You deserved it 7 425

By Jumja - 15/01/2010 11:37 - Netherlands

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 211

You deserved it 5 713

Weight watcher

By depressedkiwi - 15/07/2020 08:01

Today, I found out my mother-in-law is trying to force me to lose weight, even though I am trying, and have a medical condition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 411

You deserved it 695

By preggo - 04/12/2009 00:02 - United States

Today, I asked my mom if she could include mashed potatoes and gravy with dinner. She then went on to yell at me about my "unhealthy eating habits" and how I've "gained a lot of weight in the past few months". I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 998

You deserved it 4 195

By tardspawn - 05/04/2015 15:38 - United Kingdom - Horsham

Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 599

You deserved it 4 010

Hush

By furious parent - 03/07/2019 18:00

Today, I caught my mother telling my 11-year-old daughter that if she wants to be happy in life, she needs to start exercising now, because fat can creep up on you, and rich guys never marry fat girls with nice personalities. I was fuming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 077

You deserved it 344

By Anonymous - 22/05/2015 15:17 - United States

Today, I found out my mom put breast milk in my cereal until I was 7 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 117

You deserved it 3 185

By Missyangel - 31/12/2009 07:39 - United States

Today, my 7 year-old looked at me and stated, "When I grow up Mommy I want to be fat just like you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 376

You deserved it 11 458

By hungry - 12/02/2009 00:06 - United States

Today, my mom asked me if I had an eating problem because I've been eating less. I only started eating less because she told me I ate too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 677

You deserved it 3 509

By Anonymous - 08/06/2013 19:01 - Australia - Perth

Today, I found out why my daughter eats so many sugary baked goods. According to her, when you bake things, all the sugar and calories are "released" and so you can't gain weight from it. It seems I raised a moron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 638

You deserved it 9 528

Next

Top comments

meanmeli 0

Thursday 26 May 2011 18:59

lmfao that's messed up

saintdalman 4

Thursday 26 May 2011 19:00

Time to start cooking your own meals!

Comments

Jetboii808 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:08

Ydi for not having a glandular problem

HunterAlpha1 8

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:11

put cyanide in your mom's food. corpses are very skinny.

iluvanimegurl 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:16

lol thats crazy XD

coolwhiplova 1

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:28

Oh my god that is one of the funniest stories I've read so far on FML!

itialian_lol 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:51

79 I think thats the best thing I have read for quite a long time. I commend your abilities.

itialian_lol 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:59

200 You are a totally moronic, insulting, and sterotypical jackwagon alive. Canada is an INDEPENDANT country. America is stereotyped so much because of your type of idiocy.

Kendrax0x 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 7:30

oh my god!

Kendrax0x 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 7:32

people like that shouldn't have kids

suuusss 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 8:45

SLAP HER

lizliz23 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 6:01

smack dat bitch ( nd not in the sexy way)

11
12
13
14
15
16
17

Keywords

Lonely Awkward Love Party Cars Transportation ADHD Work Mental health Ironic Vacation Grandparents Accident Miscellaneous Annoying Kids Covid Health Shopping Cute Coworkers Dogs Animals Videos Photography Art Sex Intimacy Exhausted Money

The Top

Today, my teacher said that since I was sick last week, I had to do all the work that the others had done, which I didn't know about because no one said anything about it. So now I've got to watch a total of 5 hours-worth of documentaries, and write analysis of them. Before tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 891

You deserved it 191

Today, I'm finally dating the girl I've been fawning over for years. So what do I do? I accidentally called her by her sister's name during a conversation, which might seem like a small mistake, except I used to sleep with her sister, and she's been having a hard time getting over it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 754

You deserved it 3 687

The Top

Today, my drunk brother told me he has an incest fetish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 271

You deserved it 721

Today, while laying on the couch my cat came and laid on me. Turns out my ass is big enough for my 13 year old cat to walk around in circles, wash itself, stretch and sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 465

You deserved it 9 499

Today, the traffic court judge didn't believe my three witnesses and two security cameras that proved I was innocent. He claimed a cop would never lie, and that the dashboard security cameras, which the cop brought in, were somehow edited by me. I was fined $1,000 and my license was suspended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 376

You deserved it 2 802

Today, my husband has had a low sex drive for a while now. I've been trying all sorts of things to pique his desire. Turns out that a conversation about Neil deGrasse Tyson was all I ever needed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 589

You deserved it 567

Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 812

You deserved it 3 271

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 136

You deserved it 3 300