By onlyme123 - 27/06/2018 15:00

Today, I got a phone call. I thought it was just one of these toll free numbers that were always calling so when I answered the phone, I said, “City morgue: you stab 'em, we slab 'em! How may I help you?” It was my college calling to discuss my grades. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 895
You deserved it 3 770
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Top comments

John Nemeth 14

*school* “Oh perfect we wanted a place to put your grades to rest. We figured the ground was the lowest we could go”

47 1
BurnInDemonFire 34

Look at that. Your college taught you a lesson even when you weren't attending. Big ol' YDI comin' atcha.

32 1

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

Look at that. Your college taught you a lesson even when you weren't attending. Big ol' YDI comin' atcha.

32 1
John Nemeth 14

*school* “Oh perfect we wanted a place to put your grades to rest. We figured the ground was the lowest we could go”

47 1
Dave_Davington 33

Relax. Not everyone has a massive stick up their arse. I'm sure whoever called realises it's a joke and found it as mildly amusing as we all did. If not, then it's more **** their life for having so much sand in their ******.

11 12
RichardPencil 30

I hope you’re not majoring in Comedy. That joke is so old and stale, they would have lowered your grade on the spot. You should have gone with “You kill ‘em, we chill ‘em.”

5 6
ChromoTec 24

Is Comedy even a real major?

4 1
BurnInDemonFire 34

Yes. Major Arnold Comedy was born in 1889, and fought in the British Army during World War One. He is famous for reaching the rank of Major faster than anyone, achieving the distinction on March 13, 1915. He went on to marry Countess Emilia Rose in 1920, and had three children, Michael, Jane, and Suzanne. He died in 1966, leaving his family the small fortune of £4.8 million, after having donated £200k to many different charities.

11 0
Earl_KarmasBitch 34

He was good friends with Major Thomas Tragedy. But he came to a bad ending.

0 0
DanielleinDC 33

Seriously? That joke was old when I was a kid.

6 0
sunshine1421 14

and yet still gets the desired response

3 0
Emma1562 35

My dad did that to my phone and it turned out to be my choir teacher. He answered it as “bitches anonymous, how may I help you?” She just awkwardly laughed and said who it was.

7 0
Glowworm56 26

It's better to either not answer the phone at all or answer it like a mature and proper adult for unknown numbers.

3 3
GIJoefan 6

Reminds me of Bart Simpson: “Joe’s Crematorium, you kill em we grill em!” “Joe’s Taxidermy, you snuff em we stuff em!”

4 0
Charlie Given 26

It's a classic, when I was a kid our home phone number was 1 number different from local post office and the city morgue for yrs. we'd get wrong number calls and thanks to when caller ID came out I could tell if it was a local call for post office or a municipal call for the morgue and I would always answer with this is the post office for the city or morgue for the locals always got a laugh.

2 0