Miscellaneous: Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted...

By Sally - 22/08/2011 00:17 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 899

You deserved it 69 423

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Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

Lava lamp

By Kathleen Verhaegen - 30/04/2020 20:00

Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 389

You deserved it 296

Trumped

By Anonymous - 23/10/2019 18:00

Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 1 731

By waytootan - 22/08/2011 20:34 - United States

Today, I came in to work looking very tan. I took Friday off to go to a friend's funeral, which was outdoors, and I tan very easily. Now my boss and everyone else thinks I lied about my friend's death to get off work on a Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 019

You deserved it 3 130

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 19:06 - Denmark

Today, I decided to try a self-tanning lotion my friend had recommended. I put it on, and decided to take a nap. I woke up later and checked myself in the mirror, expecting to see a new, more tanned version of myself. I didn't. I'm now orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 586

You deserved it 39 978

By fishwizard - 02/06/2017 20:00

Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 735

You deserved it 3 971

By blotchy-girl - 15/07/2009 04:00 - New Zealand

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 064

You deserved it 6 737

By tan disaster - 27/02/2009 23:09 - United States

Today, I went to get my spray tan before my semi-formal. After I applied lotion to the bottom of my feet as instructed, I went in the booth and began to start the tanning session. I lost my balance and fell right as the machine began to spray. I look like a spotted cheetah. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 522

You deserved it 39 343

By thatsucks4u - 14/08/2010 00:56 - United States

Today, I went to a tanning salon. I guess nobody mentioned that you have to lift your fat rolls or you'll end up with weird stripes where the spray never reached. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 090

You deserved it 51 160

Lookin' good

By racoonface - 19/04/2009 15:17 - United States

Today, it was lovely outside so I decided to tan outside. I burn pretty easily, so I put on sunscreen. I fell asleep on my side, so when I woke up, I had a massive burn on only one side of my body, with sunglass lines. Tomorrow, I have a job interview. I'm going to go in looking like a racoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 680

You deserved it 54 755

New, from L'Oréal!

By oompaloompa - 28/10/2019 12:00

Today, I used a self-tanning towelette to help even out my tan lines and disguise my vitiligo a bit. Now my stomach is orange and my spots are even more noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 315

You deserved it 461

teqifsha 0

Monday 22 August 2011 8:49

Your fault

Jacobt24 19

Monday 22 August 2011 8:49

You didn't correct her before she started spraying? YDI

Comments

imaninja1 9

Wednesday 24 August 2011 7:15

Careful what you wish for

kitsune3 20

Wednesday 24 August 2011 8:15

Next time, either don't make that jok, or be clear with her to ensure she knows you're kidding.

CuddieRyan 0

Thursday 25 August 2011 8:09

That was a stupid idea... Why would she take that as a joke?

MissyBoo13 0

Friday 26 August 2011 5:20

stupid...

Ninjaflipsz 0

Friday 26 August 2011 6:14

Wow.... Just wow.

Reisling 3

Friday 26 August 2011 6:52

idiot.

DumbBrunetteXD 2

Friday 26 August 2011 23:35

That was so your fault. How the hell would she know.

Igor_g5 0

Wednesday 31 August 2011 3:38

How's she supposed to know you're joking?

Lady_Bee_fml 13

Tuesday 6 September 2011 14:43

Secretly she wanted to be the darkest shade and indulge her trashy side, but once she saw how shit it looked she pretended it had all been a joke, and tonight while sipping Martinis with her girlfriends they shall laugh together over the stupidity of the Mexican girl who did the tanning, and share tan-removing tips while discussing their sex lives...yeah...

helloirony 4

Sunday 25 September 2011 5:36

Wait ...someone who thinks spray tanning is a good idea doesn't have enough common sense to know that the tanner would have no way of knowing it was a "joke?" What a surprise. I mean, I'm shocked. Truly.