Intimacy: Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth...

By Ariel - 02/06/2009 12:19 - Israel

Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 406

You deserved it 7 767

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Same thing different taste

By chewybarseventy - 24/08/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 499

You deserved it 11 071

Planning

By stargate25 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Denver

Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 268

You deserved it 11 967

By tinypenis - 04/06/2013 12:15 - United States - Jamaica

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 821

You deserved it 71 868

By manlyman - 05/04/2009 13:32 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 308

You deserved it 5 309

By Username - 04/09/2010 13:24 - France

Today, my email got hacked and sent all my contacts something for Viagra. My husband thinks I really sent it to him on purpose and now won't even talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 161

You deserved it 3 290

By ncjarhead - 24/04/2010 23:38 - United States

Today, I discovered the same erotic pictures my wife emailed to me while I was deployed were emailed to several other guys by her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 110

You deserved it 3 123

Familiar

By Looks familiar - 13/08/2024 11:00 - United States

Today, my coworker asked me for advice for a clever comeback after she got an unsolicited dick pic. I sent her some zingers to roast the creep into oblivion. Afterward she sent me screenshots. I recognized the mole and birthmark immediately. It was my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 538

You deserved it 104

By for my brother in law - 27/07/2016 07:10 - United States - Oxnard

Today, I sent a love message to my wife asking if she was horny. Minutes later, I realized that I sent it to my mother in law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 863

You deserved it 6 771

By Mavis - 03/02/2009 07:54 - Canada

Today, I received an email invitation to a dating web site. It was from my father-in-law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 210

You deserved it 3 237

By Anonymous - 09/06/2013 05:01 - United States

Today, my wife decided to check her email, while I was still inside her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 314

You deserved it 13 178

Ilovelife07 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:13

damnnn thats rough. forward her a breast enlargement offer

DarthFurby 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:08

Haha ouch. Kind of a bitch way to give you the hint.

Comments

DarthFurby 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:08

Haha ouch. Kind of a bitch way to give you the hint.

xxbadassbitchxx 0

Friday 2 April 2010 23:38

is she a slutty wife? lol dump the bitch

liamkilcoyne 0

Tuesday 8 June 2010 0:55

hahah so funny. try and find one to revive bucket fanny and wizards sleeves :D

Mr_Positive 3

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:08

I think she was really jk, otherwise she'd talk to you about it and suggest it straight up front

Fisshie 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:10

Take the hint.

hpnerd 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:10

your name is Ariel?

seonfire 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:10

*HINT HINT*

trish27 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:10

Oh....wow.... I'm sorry, but that is hilarious!

genius_man16 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:12

I hope she was kidding. If she wasn't I'd leave her. You don't want to be married to someone so superficial.

Ilovelife07 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:13

damnnn thats rough. forward her a breast enlargement offer

ChronicReese 3

Friday 28 December 2018 3:04

lmao

FYourSEXLYFE 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:13

#7 has obviously never given someone an ******...

deliciouskaek 1

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:13

I lol'd.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 537

You deserved it 10 056

Today, my brother showed my wife a Craigslist ad by someone seeking casual sex. It had very specific details that made it seem like I wrote it. My brother later admitted in private that he made the post as revenge for me not loaning him $500 last month. Meanwhile, my wife still thinks I'm unfaithful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 647

You deserved it 1 159

The Top

Today, while having sex with my husband, he accidentally elbowed me in the face. I don't know which is worse: that he didn't stop to see if I was OK, or that it seemed to turn him on and he climaxed immediately after he'd hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 115

You deserved it 5 920

Today, I was in a rush and didn't notice that the bathroom stall I chose at work had a broken lock. Halfway through my business, a coworker barged in. We locked eyes for an awkward eternity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 79

Today my boyfriend told me that dirty talk with me was like potty training a puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 876

You deserved it 446

Today, I realized the topic for my 1750-word essay could end up offending people, and I had to start all over from the beginning with a different topic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 677

Today, I started a new job as a resident at a rural hospital. So far, nobody has been able to tell me when the shifts were officially supposed to end. They told me they just "leave when we're done with all the patients." I work on a 24/7 emergency station, and I guess I now also live here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 143

Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 360

You deserved it 665

Same thing different taste

Planning

Familiar

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