Miscellaneous: Today, I got hit between the legs with a kayak. FML - FML

By UnidentifiedFun - 31/01/2015 18:22 - United States - Troy

Today, I got hit between the legs with a kayak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 443

You deserved it 3 168

UnidentifiedFun tells us more.

UnidentifiedFun 37

Sunday 1 February 2015 18:19

Alright, some of you need clarification.. So my friend and I were paddle boarding/kayaking (she had the kayak), and I decided to backfloat in the water for a bit, as it was smooth waters and a relaxing day. But alas, my friend thought it would be hilarious to full-steam ahead into my crotch. Needless to say, it was a painful experience.

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

Exodiafinder687 58

Sunday 1 February 2015 12:33

I wonder if it would hurt more to be hit by a kayak oar a canoe.

ItsAUnicorn 27

Sunday 1 February 2015 12:10

That still ******* hurts though

Comments

HallahBackGirl 12

Monday 2 February 2015 4:06

That's going to be a bruise... But maybe the kayak enjoyed itself.

nogoth 12

Monday 2 February 2015 10:32

Everything's a ***** if you're brave enough...

ChampHero 27

Thursday 5 February 2015 1:56

I hope you didn't get hit too hard by that kayak.

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I really wanted to spend a night of passion with my lover, so I'd arranged to meet him in a very classy hotel, gave him the room number, and waited for him in a super-sexy outfit. There was a knock at the door, so I opened it slowly and enticingly, assuming it was him. It was room service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 406

You deserved it 11 953

Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 434

You deserved it 46 509

The Top

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 691

You deserved it 34 727

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 123

You deserved it 1 960

Today, I found the birthday card my grandma had mailed. Apparently, it contained a gift of $100. Too bad it was in my mom's trash can, opened, with no money. She told my grandma it must have gotten lost in the mail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 621

You deserved it 2 476

Today, I was training a new volunteer at a clothing donation center. While explaining how to sort donations, I reached into a garbage bag full of clothes and something on my hand caught my eye. It was a bed bug. The bag was full of them and they sought refuge up my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 972

You deserved it 274

Today, I finally finished vacuuming my downstairs. Instead of finding the wall outlet and unplugging the vacuum, I triumphantly tugged the cord from across the room to release the plug from the wall. It flew at me at top speed and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 944

You deserved it 41 956

Today, it was my grandfather's burial. As the family was about to leave, a great aunt came up to my skinny, tall and pretty cousin and told her, "Stay beautiful and kind." Then, she walked to me and said, "And you, Stay kind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 714

You deserved it 3 513