Sex and Intimacy: Today, I got the sex talk from my dad. It wouldn't have been...

By confused_girl - 01/08/2013 05:10 - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, I got the sex talk from my dad. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't said, "It's not the size of the stick, it's how you use it." I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 396

You deserved it 5 041

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Same thing different taste

Don't wanna know

By Anonymous - 16/02/2011 05:50

Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 212

You deserved it 4 187

By Anonymous - 03/02/2013 16:27 - Serbia

Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis. Before I knew what was going on, she said, "It's not the size that matters though. It's how you use it. So I guess you're ok." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 809

You deserved it 5 456

By tobuscus9412 - 22/03/2015 01:04 - Australia - Woronora

Today, my father decided it would be a good idea to give me the sex talk, at Target, at the top of his lungs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 152

You deserved it 3 341

By ReallyMom - 09/01/2014 21:48 - United States - Shawano

Today, my mom tried giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consisted of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 699

You deserved it 5 204

By Anonymous - 23/02/2012 20:25 - United States

Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 819

You deserved it 37 528

By more than I wanted to know - 13/05/2013 19:10 - Italy - San Giustino

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 198

You deserved it 5 876

By accident - 14/02/2014 22:41 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 059

You deserved it 5 829

By CallaC - 15/03/2012 02:01 - Canada

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 514

You deserved it 2 901

By PPP - 28/04/2015 15:05 - United States

Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 660

You deserved it 3 338

Scarred for life

By Aly - 09/12/2011 15:40 - United States

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 174

You deserved it 5 864

Wizardo 33

Thursday 1 August 2013 16:12

Maybe he was talking about ******?

JustJumped 22

Thursday 1 August 2013 16:14

He's just trying to make sure you don't get disappointed some day

Comments

Silentcrafter11 13

Tuesday 6 August 2013 11:38

When I got the sex talk, it was from my brother because my mom sent him, and I did not have a father around as a child. He demonstrated sex with stuffed animals

nolanj21 6

Friday 23 August 2013 7:04

Was he drunk?

Bludmagnus 13

Sunday 1 September 2013 13:15

Sounds like he is trying to keep you from being a shallow person.

kyla_milan13 5

Monday 14 October 2013 5:23

I don't get it....

lonelyguy1995 5

Monday 13 January 2014 23:38

If you're not from Thailand it's not that bad. He is just making sure.

daemonsparta 16

Saturday 25 April 2015 7:58

valuable advice to stop you from shaking guys based on size

tamesenicole 27

Sunday 21 June 2015 19:38

I voted YLS because it's embarrassing to get this talk with the opposite sex but voted YDI because hey, dad's know right? Better heard from him than on the streets