By accident - 14/02/2014 22:41 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy
Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 058
You deserved it 5 828
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Top comments

thief1434 23

The question is, what condoms did he recommend?

143 5

Comments

leary96 15

Why do you look like a young Miley Cyrus.

0 2
adrianh1090 12

Let's just say he was a fast swimmer lol.

21 7
Bilbo_Swaggins 5

I would agree considering they didnt get an aboration, put you up for adoption etc.

5 35
kristabelli 19

This may be one of the best FMLs ever. xD

3 24
buttcramp 21

yeah I agree. your dad loves you, OP! He decided to talk to you about sex, which isn't a comfortable thing to discuss with your kids. He cares enough that he wanted you to be informed (even though you were already) and I think that says a lot! Still, it sucks what he said but maybe he was just telling you that to make it "real" like, what you do now can change your life forever. If he really didn't want you, he wouldn't have been around for this conversation to even take place.

13 11
mnwlf13 3

Don't let his comment rip you two apart. Be stronger then durex.

15 0
Keattles 14

Why? His dad is awesome! Has a great sense of humor! And I am sure he loves him! ^^

7 1
doodlecloud 26

I really don't understand why people get so upset about 'not being planned'. Some people DO plan a baby and then still end up hating or regretting it, others don't plan but are overjoyed when they find out they're pregnant. Whether you're planned or not really doesn't matter in the slightest, it's what your parents did with the news and how they looked after you since that's important.

11 0
thief1434 23

The question is, what condoms did he recommend?

143 5
happylappy 21

That's weird. In sex ed they told is Trojan was the worst and durex and lifestyle were the best.

3 20
Enslaved 36

I always worried about using the Rameses brand. Do you really want to use a condom named after a pharaoh that "fathered" over 160 kids? On a side note: IMO Durex are actually a good brand. Maybe they've improved over the years since the OP's conception?

33 1
letmehavemytea 21

I think Trojan condoms are still pretty good? Then again it probably depends on the different kinds of condoms the brands carry.

2 2
junkman6 22

The new tire smell of durex condoms has always bothered me. Just from personal experience, the military hands out durex condoms and they break all the damn time. Just go buy some Trojans that actually stretch a bit before they tear in half.

12 1
j_cat187 19

Wrap your willy in fiberglass sheet coated in epoxy resin.

8 10
arandomusernameaa 20

@62: and hey presto... you have a condom that won't break and the guy won't want sex as much ! (because he can't feel it)

2 8
thief1434 23

Why is not wanting sex a particularly good thing?

0 1
JMichael 25

Naked condoms. It feels like nothing's there.

13 2
SokDek 14

Trojans smell bad.. use either skyn or magnums.

1 4
jmcr 27

Idk personally i think SKYN or lifestyle are better

0 0
thief1434 23

It's funny 'cause I have no idea what the hell you're even talking about xD. I just recognize Trojans.

1 4
Trin_Tran 26

... I mean how many of us are here because of that ? You're here so I'm sure he loves you OP

49 5
Davids9199 14

Well now you know not to use them right?

6 8
Sodapop40 21

Is this the dad who threw the box of condoms at his kid? Maybe he decided to take a different approach

38 6
WaterBui 9

Well at least he told you ya know; better than having an unplanned child (if the brand is that bad)

2 15
CallMeMcFeelii 13

Durex was always my "last minute" choice. Mainly because gas stations sell them for like 75 cents. Glow in the dark and flavored! That brand saved my nights quite a few times. But we all know Trojan is the way to go.

6 11
ZY1431 24

well at least he's being honest in giving advice

12 4
Dunmerdude 13

Tell him "Don't worry dad, I shouldn't have a problem. I wear XL, not XS like you"

5 47
sunshine41196 12

this doesnt even make sense! the fml is about the company not the size.... everything doesnot need to end with whose dick is bigger

38 1