Intimacy: Today, I had three things converge that should never be together:...

By Anonymous - 27/05/2012 07:42 - United States - Fresno

Today, I had three things converge that should never be together: my period, hot doctor, and a colonoscopy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 845

You deserved it 3 046

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Same thing different taste

By welp24 - 28/10/2018 03:00

Today, at the age of 25, for the first time in my life, I was lying mostly naked in front of a man while he was inserting something in my body. Too bad that man was a doctor and that thing was a colonoscopy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 199

You deserved it 369

By John - 24/06/2011 07:17 - United States

Today, I had my anus probed twice by two different doctors. I was diagnosed with hemorrhoids. I'm a 22 year old guy and have to schedule a colonoscopy for next week. I guess there's a first time for everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 125

You deserved it 3 430

Bad timing

By Horneyandbleeding - 23/11/2020 07:01 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I got my period. I was going to have my first threesome tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 125

You deserved it 493

By Lolly - 12/09/2018 23:30

Today, I have a UTI that spread to my kidneys, a yeast infection, and a herpes outbreak. Oh, and my period came this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 288

You deserved it 831

By ERnightmare - 02/08/2018 21:00 - United States - Long Beach

Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 115

You deserved it 4 267

By cramps - 17/09/2009 13:59 - Australia

Today, I got my period. 10 minutes into a 3 hour exam. Apparently they are serious when they say you may not leave the room under any circumstances. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 204

You deserved it 4 005

By loveless - 18/10/2009 10:30 - Australia

Today, I realised that the last three people to see my intimate parts these last weeks were my beautician, my doctor and the lady who did my check up ultra sound. Oh, and I'm married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 596

You deserved it 5 715

By Unlucky - 24/05/2010 00:22 - Australia

Today, I have both a cold and a period. Tomorrow, I will have a cold, my period and my wisdom teeth taken out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 462

You deserved it 3 801

Fingered

By Anonymous - 03/07/2023 19:00 - Finland - Tampere

Today, I went to see a doctor because of some blood in my stool. Not only is the matter embarrassing enough as is, it turned out the doctor was a young, crisply dressed, extremely handsome man. I then had his finger in my ass for a check-up, all the while him being very nice about it. I'm still mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 215

By SickSmick - 09/02/2010 12:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning, and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 592

You deserved it 3 492

perdix 29

Sunday 27 May 2012 16:18

Don't think you really had a chance with the hot doctor -- to him, you're just another asshole.

speshlk37 13

Sunday 27 May 2012 16:02

It's the perfect storm...

Comments

wittykitty14 7

Wednesday 30 May 2012 17:40

I have a list of things I won't do when I'm on my period...I should add a colonoscopy to that list

FlyMeAway 2

Thursday 11 October 2012 1:45

Where is the doctors FML? 'Today, I had a patient scheduled for a colonoscopy, nothing special. That is until I realised she was on her period. Can you say awkward? FML' (Excuse me if someone already posted the 'doctors' FML)

XandraHart 15

Thursday 6 August 2015 20:26

One word: tampon :)

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, it was dad’s funeral and I intended to speak but I was crying so much I couldn’t finish and mom had to help me back to my seat. Unfortunately, most of our family are arseholes and I could hear someone saying, “Disgraceful, shaming his dad like that.” It was the worst day of my entire life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 633

You deserved it 81

Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here" from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 059

You deserved it 8 155

The Top

Today, the guy I had a two-week long fling with and got pregnant by (while on birth control I might add), and who disappeared more than a decade ago after I told him, showed up at my door, demanding shared custody of my daughter. While he is her biological parent, she’s never met him and was terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 832

You deserved it 224

Today, I got on the bus and the driver said I didn't have to pay since the ticket machine was broken. I was happy to have saved £2.40 until i realised someone had stolen my new £700 phone while I was talking to the driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 403

You deserved it 308

Today, getting off a bus, it was pouring rain so I got my umbrella out. A man elbowed me in the gut and grabbed it. When I told my mom about it she said, "That's New York, get over it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 950

You deserved it 5 676

Today, there's a moth in my house, who either does nothing, or flies around like it just ate enough sugar for one lifetime. Every time I see it, I think it's a wasp and, being deathly afraid of them, I go into a full-blown panic attack until the sight of it bumping into light bulbs brings me back to reality. FML

I agree, your life sucks 643

You deserved it 380

Today, I got in an argument with my boss and I dared him to fire me because he has always said he couldn’t run the shop without me. Turns out he was just being nice all this time, my job could in fact be done by his 14 year-old niece with no training in two thirds the time. Yes, he fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 1 791

Today, my friends and I got front stage tickets to our favorite band. Being my first concert, we planned to start a small mosh pit in the back. I got knocked out by my best friend's elbow and was rushed to the hospital, during the first song. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 772

You deserved it 30 336

Same thing different taste

Bad timing

Fingered

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