Health: Today, I had to admit that I'm an alcoholic when I spent my last... - FML

By ash - 25/08/2011 22:57 - United States

Today, I had to admit that I'm an alcoholic when I spent my last dollar bills on Southern Comfort instead of tampons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 105

You deserved it 41 834

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Same thing different taste

By Cpt_Concerned - 22/09/2009 04:37 - Canada

Today, I realized that my alcoholism has gotten so bad that I rotate liquor stores so the clerks don't think bad about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 429

You deserved it 52 600

Drunken antics

By qx5 - 08/01/2011 22:05 - Canada

Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 524

You deserved it 58 097

By geeb - 23/02/2010 18:33 - United States

Today, I had to confess to my mother that I was too hungover to take her to her AA meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 593

You deserved it 36 513

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 293

You deserved it 12 381

By foxfur - 14/07/2016 12:21 - United States - Williamstown

Today, my drinking habit hit a new low when I waited almost an hour to go to the liquor store after it opened because I didn't want to seem desperate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 718

You deserved it 3 951

By choup - 07/11/2008 21:02 - Australia

Today, I went to have a drink with my friend. On the way I withdrew 20 bucks and when I arrived at the bar I realised I had taken my credit card but not the banknote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 198

You deserved it 27 584

By Watchingmyfigure - 06/12/2016 17:55 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I was so hungry and broke that I resorted to drinking salad dressing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 983

You deserved it 1 243

Winner winner chicken dinner

By Anonymous - 26/02/2021 14:02

Today, I realized I have finally turned into my mother when I got excited about using so many coupons that I only paid 70 cents for $14 worth of groceries. I need a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 784

You deserved it 249

By jannister - 13/08/2012 19:25 - Germany - Bad Blankenburg

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 915

You deserved it 2 151

Dad priorities

By hellishome - 29/09/2019 00:01

Today, as he was going out, I asked my father if he stop by the store and buy some tampons for me and toilet paper for the house, because we have been out for the last 5 days. He came home with a 30-pack of beer and cigarettes instead. I just started my time of the month and we have no more money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 337

You deserved it 204

Next

Top comments

kickblocker 18

Friday 26 August 2011 8:40

Who needs tampons? Just go with the flow

j4gerb0mblitz 6

Friday 26 August 2011 8:39

Who needs tampons, bottles work fine too. Well I hope they do...

Comments

TorontoChik 0

Friday 26 August 2011 11:34

There's always the diva cup! :) it's Eco friendly! :D

onefinemess 11

Sunday 28 August 2011 11:49

oh that's just nasty. Diva cup is A.) Spillable, B.) A real toxic shock syndrome risk, and C.) Who knows if it will stay in right. Not to mention do you know she could have a big bottle and a small bottle of So Co if you include Diva Cup and shipping and handling? Pffft silly post indeed!

I_See_Purple_Ppl 0

Friday 26 August 2011 11:49

First step is admitting it...

sara_saturday 5

Friday 26 August 2011 12:37

no it isn't.

I_See_Purple_Ppl 0

Friday 26 August 2011 11:52

Like other posters before me, I hope you remember this day when your liver has turned against you. Not to mention all the other problems being an alcoholic causes..

neongurl98 10

Friday 26 August 2011 12:06

WTF

mndlssphnx 10

Friday 26 August 2011 12:17

Use Cherokee hair instead.

onefinemess 11

Sunday 28 August 2011 11:51

Those too are tampons and she couldn't afford them remember? Great SP ref though!

TheComputerGuy96 16

Friday 26 August 2011 12:55

You totally deserve it!!! **** alcoholic people!!!

ReynshineCutting 10

Friday 26 August 2011 17:03

And the biggest idiot of the day award goes to...

suri23 11

Friday 26 August 2011 13:46

Yep, that's an indicator.

epyk_pryncess 8

Friday 26 August 2011 14:33

Toilet paper is cheaper... And so is generic alcohol.

MLuckyCapoeirist 6

Friday 26 August 2011 14:34

And just look at the name of the alcohol : Southern "Comfort". Gee, if you needed "comfort" maybe save the money ?

candacemarie1596 3

Friday 26 August 2011 14:52

you always come before your habits .

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The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 507

You deserved it 15 067

Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 1 842

The Top

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to give me a "hickey" with a vacuum cleaner while I was passed out drunk. Not only do I have to try and explain this to my girlfriend, but we're meeting her parents for lunch this afternoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 063

You deserved it 22 458

Today, I woke up to my overly religious grandmother trying to shove salt down my throat yelling "DEMON BE GONE!". Why? I didn't wear the cross neckless she bought me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 185

You deserved it 228

Today, I noticed quite a few scars on one of my coworker's legs. I pulled her aside and told her that self-harm was never the answer, and if she needed to talk I was always there. Turns out she's just clumsy and trips a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 129

You deserved it 6 152

Today, Rudolph's nose burned out. I had to guide the sleigh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 74

Today, my boyfriend decided to give me my Christmas present early because he's going to his grandparents' house for Christmas and won't see me. I was excited, until I unwrapped a sweater that I left there a month ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 231

You deserved it 2 994

Today, I got bitten by my aunt's dog. My brother was holding the leash. He said he didn't pull the dog away from me because he didn't want to rip my shirt. Meanwhile, the dog was biting a penny-sized chunk out of my hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 082

You deserved it 2 795