Health: Today, I had to admit that I'm an alcoholic when I spent my last... - FML

By ash - 25/08/2011 22:57 - United States

Today, I had to admit that I'm an alcoholic when I spent my last dollar bills on Southern Comfort instead of tampons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 105

You deserved it 41 834

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Same thing different taste

By Cpt_Concerned - 22/09/2009 04:37 - Canada

Today, I realized that my alcoholism has gotten so bad that I rotate liquor stores so the clerks don't think bad about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 429

You deserved it 52 600

Drunken antics

By qx5 - 08/01/2011 22:05 - Canada

Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 524

You deserved it 58 097

By geeb - 23/02/2010 18:33 - United States

Today, I had to confess to my mother that I was too hungover to take her to her AA meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 593

You deserved it 36 513

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 293

You deserved it 12 381

By foxfur - 14/07/2016 12:21 - United States - Williamstown

Today, my drinking habit hit a new low when I waited almost an hour to go to the liquor store after it opened because I didn't want to seem desperate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 718

You deserved it 3 951

By choup - 07/11/2008 21:02 - Australia

Today, I went to have a drink with my friend. On the way I withdrew 20 bucks and when I arrived at the bar I realised I had taken my credit card but not the banknote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 198

You deserved it 27 584

By Watchingmyfigure - 06/12/2016 17:55 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I was so hungry and broke that I resorted to drinking salad dressing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 983

You deserved it 1 243

Winner winner chicken dinner

By Anonymous - 26/02/2021 14:02

Today, I realized I have finally turned into my mother when I got excited about using so many coupons that I only paid 70 cents for $14 worth of groceries. I need a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 784

You deserved it 249

By jannister - 13/08/2012 19:25 - Germany - Bad Blankenburg

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 915

You deserved it 2 151

Dad priorities

By hellishome - 29/09/2019 00:01

Today, as he was going out, I asked my father if he stop by the store and buy some tampons for me and toilet paper for the house, because we have been out for the last 5 days. He came home with a 30-pack of beer and cigarettes instead. I just started my time of the month and we have no more money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 337

You deserved it 204

Next

Top comments

kickblocker 18

Friday 26 August 2011 8:40

Who needs tampons? Just go with the flow

j4gerb0mblitz 6

Friday 26 August 2011 8:39

Who needs tampons, bottles work fine too. Well I hope they do...

Comments

leadman1989 15

Friday 26 August 2011 15:14

Save money buy used tampons or better yet use leaves... I don't know in a guy give me a break.

leadman1989 15

Friday 26 August 2011 15:16

Me - Op you're bleeding Op - I aint got time to bleed (too busy drinking) XD

chronick89 5

Friday 26 August 2011 15:29

Only in the US of A

loserman67 35

Friday 26 August 2011 17:20

Number one - wad up some toilet tissue and *gently* insert it into your hey-nanny-nanny. Number two - drink a shit load of SoCo & Coke to forget that you have *gently* inserted wadded up toilet tissue into your Hey-Nanny-Nanny.

oops_im_fucked 8

Friday 26 August 2011 17:21

YDI for not spending it on grey goose.

BIGBOY4rmAHM 19

Friday 26 August 2011 17:25

Get some help

saturnsonic 3

Friday 26 August 2011 18:06

your my kind of woman ;-)

PoisonPixieDust 5

Saturday 27 August 2011 4:08

Thanks :)

divadro102 16

Friday 26 August 2011 18:20

How cheap were these southern comforts if you were down to your last dollar bills?

mommasgrl20028 5

Friday 26 August 2011 18:32

No one deserves to be an alcoholic. There's a huge misconception that incidences like these are the person's choice. Trust me. I've been there...I need to stop posting serious, intelligent comments on here...too many ignoramuses...

darkmis1 17

Friday 26 August 2011 18:36

SoCo is horrible! It made me have a seizure and have to go to the hospital once. You do have a problem. Call AA. NOW!

mmmeow 0

Friday 26 August 2011 19:27

Lmao!

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The Top

Today, I told my boyfriend of nearly a year that I finally told my mother about him, and that she wants us to fly out so he can meet her. He said “OK” with a blank expression. I went to work, and when I got home, he and all his stuff were gone. He left a note on the fridge, saying, “Sorry, I can’t do this anymore. All the best.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 589

You deserved it 131

Today, my boss is going nuts after some coworkers quit, as they were some of the lucky few with enough cash to move away ahead of whatever dumbass plan the next administration has for their immigrant families and friends. My boss is complaining he can't afford to pay "normal people wages" and wants me to work overtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 170

The Top

Today, the unhealthiest person I know, weighing in at around 350 pounds told me she was now a vegan. I then told her the Cheese-Itz, as well as the leather boots she was wearing wasn't vegan. She said I was wrong. I'm a nutritionist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 918

You deserved it 705

Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invited all his friend and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I called to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 629

You deserved it 4 111

Today, I'm watching my brother's cat while he's gone. I'm a seasoned cat veteran, having been around cats my whole life, but I never thought I would ever have to say, "Bob, why did you jump into the trashcan again?" with complete seriousness. This cat is WEIRD. And I've seen quite a few oddball cats before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 657

You deserved it 194

Today, I found out that instead of going on a date with a girl I've liked for months, I'm going to be forced to have lunch with my grandmother tomorrow. Instead of losing my virginity, I will get to be interrogated about why I'm single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 739

You deserved it 7 311

Today, my boyfriend logged onto his old Skype account from 2012 to nostalgically look back at some old gaming chats. He started bawling when he came across his now-deceased online friend’s profile and reminisced about the good times. The whole chat consisted of the ‘N word’ sent back and forth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 577

You deserved it 208

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 993

You deserved it 5 285