Kids: Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could... - FML

By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 245

You deserved it 3 186

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 02:00

Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 126

You deserved it 146

By Vitani_Verci - 15/01/2016 06:57

Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 965

You deserved it 1 780

Primitive art

By Anonymous - 19/04/2021 00:30

Today, I went to check on my 2 year-old daughter in her playroom, since she was being awfully quiet. I walk in to see her finger painting with her own feces on her kiddie table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 300

Learning curve

By Anonymous - 16/08/2017 16:00

Today, my 3-year-old son put into practice the lesson I taught him yesterday, about how to use a larger piece of Play-Doh to pick up smaller bits. Unfortunately, he used this method to pick up a small bit of poo from his pants with a larger bit of poo direct from the toilet. I was an hour late for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 077

You deserved it 492

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 06:36 - United States

Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 609

You deserved it 3 176

By Dirty - 23/02/2017 08:00 - Canada

Today, I grabbed a fresh hand towel from the drawer in the bathroom. I wiped my hands and noticed they smelled like shit. My 6-year-old had wiped poo from his finger onto the dark grey towels. I guess he sometimes helps the poo out. Good to know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 360

You deserved it 559

So sweet

By Mom of 3 - 07/10/2018 15:30

Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 957

You deserved it 437

Surprise!

By ilana - 10/02/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 427

You deserved it 3 346

Messy

By chuchie - 12/06/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my 5 month-old nephew, who hasn't pooped in two days according to his mom. Well, he pooped. I accidentally stuck my finger in it. While I was wiping my finger off, he rolled over and peed on my new carpet. I rolled him over to clean the pee and he opened fire and pooped again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 569

You deserved it 6 656

By Livingthedream - 12/08/2018 06:00

Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 957

You deserved it 468

Next

Top comments

LaydiexSkull 3

Monday 12 September 2011 2:20

How creative!(: He might grow up to be the next Picasso OP :p

lemonkittens 8

Monday 12 September 2011 2:24

Poop really captures the true essence of the color brown. Or green. It depends. Be grateful now he can draw you pretty pictures in beautiful, high quality colors.

Comments

Commander223 9

Monday 12 September 2011 2:47

*Insert awful pun about shit*

zachherbert 10

Monday 12 September 2011 3:35

Ahhhh shit, another crappy poop joke. It'll probably stink.

j_cat187 19

Monday 12 September 2011 6:02

Damn the sarcasm like blew up and showered me in shit

barbiesaurus 0

Monday 12 September 2011 3:03

That happened to me once. I thought it was chocolate but when I sprayed it with cleaner another odor was released.

marpay 11

Monday 12 September 2011 9:13

Think this has happened to everyone who has or spends lots of time around a child. It's terrible but it happens.

stormchaser24 24

Monday 12 September 2011 3:04

Oh so what. I have to do it everyday. But FYL. wait until they paint with other things. But I know how your feel.

Freeze_fml 16

Monday 12 September 2011 3:08

Given the oddities of contemporary art, he might be a genius.

FYLDeep 25

Monday 12 September 2011 4:20

More like a prodigy.

sugarkiller_fml 6

Monday 12 September 2011 3:19

The level of sh&& tolerance of some people in this website is astonishing. Are you all living in some remote mountains where education is just a joke? Do me a favor, please stop humiliating Picasso by relating it to him.

derekwb 0

Monday 12 September 2011 3:21

Ahhh Mona Lisa in shit form-_-

leadman1989 15

Monday 12 September 2011 3:26

There's always a choice. You don't HAVE to do anything, you chose to do it, so if you chose to do it then that means you liked it!!! FYL!!! Joking obviously

leadman1989 15

Monday 12 September 2011 3:58

Shit baby grew up? He survived!!! :D

cherrypie22 6

Monday 12 September 2011 3:41

This is a perfect example of why I hate kids

BrianaCrespo 0

Monday 12 September 2011 3:43

EEW ... This Is Why I Have A Low Tolerence For Kids ....

EnEl_Infierno 15

Monday 12 September 2011 3:46

Thumbs up, just for my profile pic ^,^

EnEl_Infierno 15

Monday 12 September 2011 5:43

Haters Gone Hate.

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Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Social Media Love Facebook Am I overreacting? AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Relatable Students Technology Education Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward

The Top

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 813

You deserved it 9 769

Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 1 847

The Top

Today, my daughter got fired from a high five figures job for making up fake religious holidays to get days off, and for almost a year her boss was so scared of being called a racist, he never bothered to look into it until today, and she was sacked 10 minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 829

You deserved it 387

Today, while trying on clothes in Macy's, someone decided to throw some shoes over the wall and into my changing stall. I now have a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 216

You deserved it 3 002

Today, I proposed. She immediately said no and then broke up with me. FML

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You deserved it 425

Today, I knew my girlfriend was having a bad day. I went to bring her frozen yogurt at work because she loves it. When I was in the elevator, I overheard her colleague saying that the reason she was upset was because she had been cheating on her boyfriend with her new intern. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108 429

You deserved it 4 414

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 185

You deserved it 4 782

Today, I had to go buy diaper rash cream. For myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 407

You deserved it 7 476