Animals: Today, I had to convince my 20-year-old boyfriend that not only...

By hellostupid - 28/03/2013 08:19 - United States

Today, I had to convince my 20-year-old boyfriend that not only is his aquatic turtle a reptile, but that it's also cold-blooded and thus can't regulate its own temperature just by going into its shell. He still thinks I'm the stupid one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 970

You deserved it 4 811

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By difference between birds and mammals. - 03/09/2012 00:10 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching TV and there were penguins laying eggs. He said, "Penguins are mammals, they don't lay eggs." I replied, "Penguins are birds." We fought about it for ages until he realised that I was right, and has since stopped talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 436

You deserved it 2 757

By our kids will be derps - 22/06/2013 19:28 - Canada - Nelson

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 481

You deserved it 6 946

By Anonymous - 01/10/2012 14:50 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, I had to explain to my 22-year-old boyfriend that mice do not grow up to be rats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 857

You deserved it 2 852

By facepalm - 12/09/2011 08:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that a tornado is not the same thing as a hurricane. I couldn't convince him, and he still won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 142

You deserved it 3 811

By SFra - 24/10/2012 01:19 - United States

Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 831

You deserved it 3 083

By Anonymous - 15/06/2009 17:17 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me and left me with the responsibility of the turtle that I never wanted but she insisted we buy "together." A little bit of research has revealed that Andre will live for "at least 30 years." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 674

You deserved it 7 332

Alas, poor Donatello

By randomsamm - 17/10/2019 04:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I bought a turtle after wanting one for years. I was told that he was scared, so he would be put in a box for me to take home. It wasn't until I got to my car that I noticed that they sold me a dead turtle. I'm not getting a refund because they claimed I killed it in less than 5 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 222

By Anonymous - 30/08/2011 17:35 - Canada

Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 402

You deserved it 12 871

By James - 26/08/2011 18:29 - Canada

Today, I got into a heated argument with my mom, because apparently I'm an idiot for not sharing her belief that chickens are mammals. She has a university degree in this stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 634

You deserved it 3 706

By shorty4 - 13/07/2012 14:36 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend, who is a fully-grown man, that making dinosaur noises in public is no longer acceptable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 356

You deserved it 7 695

mikepzz 27

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:17

Stop ruining ninja turtles for me... *plugs ears*

loserman67 35

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:27

Tell him that alligators, crocodiles are closely related to dinosaurs and birds are actually living dinosaurs and watch his head explode.

Comments

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:30

I think Google could solve this type of issues very quickly...

Bibliovore 26

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:31

I take it he's never read up on how to take care of his pet? Poor turtle.

yeti37 16

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:32

And people wonder why teachers have it so tough. If YOU can't convince him, what makes you think a teacher can? He's the guy we made fun of in the teachers' lounge. Dump the idiot.

meso222 8

Thursday 28 March 2013 13:22

No, do not dump him... An empty head is easier to fill with the things you want him to know. He may never be the smartest companion but enough treats and belly rubs, you could possibly train him to do all sorts of tricks. It is not cruel if he is happy and you are happy, never pass up an opertunity.

Bibliovore 26

Saturday 13 June 2015 15:08

You... make fun of your students in the teachers' lounge? That's pretty appalling, not to mention immature.

moonfull101 13

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:33

Well we can clearly see he is obviously the bright one. I wonder what happened to his childhood...

bybib 20

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:36

Seems you're just not turtly enough for the turtle club.

ViviMage 38

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:41

Some turtles have a shred of warm bloodedness. Sea turtles have the ability to be a degree or two warmer than than the water they live in. Don't worry. Just put the boyfriend under his heat lamp for at least 6-8 hours in the morning to fire up those brain cells!

rokolodo 10

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:44

That depends, if you stay with him.

docscientist 9

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:54

Did this happen before the Internet?

Michael_92 20

Thursday 28 March 2013 19:46

Them were the dark days...

kthxbie 10

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:54

Oh so they ARE reptiles?

perdix 29

Thursday 28 March 2013 12:58

If he thought it was an amphibian, you may want to let it go and consider his other traits. But, if he thinks it's a mammal, bird, fish or any kind of invertebrate, DUMP HIM!!