Love and Health: Today, I had to get a pre-exposure rabies vaccine for school....

By VetTechStudent - 25/10/2018 15:30

Today, I had to get a pre-exposure rabies vaccine for school. My boyfriend thinks I'll give him rabies and refuses to let me sleep in the same bed with him or initiate sex. I need two more shots over the next 3 weeks, which means sleeping on the couch for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 764

You deserved it 365

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

Last Week Tonight

By Anonymous - 13/07/2022 02:00

Today, I realised I had a bad month. Last week, I threw out my back; the week before, my girlfriend got a cold sore; this week, I got chickenpox at the ripe age of 31 years. When I went to bed last night, I found my girlfriend sound asleep with her vibrator in one hand. We haven't had sex for so long, I can't even blame her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 069

You deserved it 258

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By Anonymous - 15/06/2021 08:00

Today, my boyfriend is so scared of COVID that he takes precautions beyond what health professionals recommend to satisfy his OCD. He told me he wouldn't be getting the vaccine because he "won't be controlled by the government." Not to worry, he will just continue to be the unbearable control freak he transformed into since this all began. FML

I agree, your life sucks 977

You deserved it 206

Weeks?

By not getting any - 31/03/2020 08:00

Today, I’m allergic to all forms of hormonal birth control, and due to the virus outbreak, I can’t get my implant replaced. We’re in quarantine, and my boyfriend and I just used our last condom. It’s going to be a long couple of weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 911

You deserved it 570

By CallMeJesusFreak - 23/06/2011 23:58 - United States

Today, I couldn't prove my son has had chickenpox, so his school gave us the option of getting a potentially dangerous shot he didn't need, pay for an expensive blood test to show that he previously had the virus, or sign a waiver stating I'm a religious nut refusing medical treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 008

You deserved it 7 931

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By bad sleeper - 19/05/2021 08:00 - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he never wants to sleepover anymore. He said he loves me, but that sleeping next to me is like sleeping next to someone reenacting the crucifixion while being mauled to death by squirrels. So much for cuddling through the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 216

By Anonymous - 28/08/2018 06:00

Today, my boyfriend's dog, which he got even though he knew I was allergic, literally got in between us while we were having sex. He didn't stop and got mad when I did. Now I'm itchy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 025

You deserved it 352

By meow - 14/01/2010 04:27 - United States

Today, my boyfriend informed me that sharing a bed with me was like sleeping with a seizing cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 771

You deserved it 4 494

Get vaccinated, you doofuses

By Anonymous - 28/09/2021 08:00 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend came into town for the weekend. A proof of vaccination card to enter non-essential businesses also started. My dear boyfriend refuses to sign up for the card. Guess our nights out will be grocery shopping and him waiting outside while I shop anywhere else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 384

By StillBetterThanTwilight - 28/08/2012 15:56 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, my boyfriend told me that he had once been possessed by demons, and that he now sleeps with a knife under his pillow for protection from, "The dark spirits that are feasting upon his soul." I'm not sure that I'll be sleeping over anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 589

You deserved it 2 608

By booearns - 17/04/2012 03:47 - United States

Today, I visited my doctor upon coming home from University. I found out that I'm severely allergic to our pet bunny, which has resulted in a rash taking over my body. She suggested that we get rid of the bunny. I told my mom. She told me to come home less often. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 952

You deserved it 3 181

cptncuttlefish 24

Thursday 25 October 2018 15:42

Why do you have to sleep on the couch because he’s ******* stupid?

MA_medQ 7

Thursday 25 October 2018 16:25

First of all, why are you dating a dumbass? Second of all, why are you letting him kick you out of bed? He can sleep on the couch if he is too stupid to understand how vaccines work. Third, bring him with you to the doctor next time you go get a shot so the doc can explain how vaccines work to him.

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

Sunday 7 October 2018 20:31

Man smart, woman smarter. But in this instance, man dumb.

cptncuttlefish 24

Thursday 25 October 2018 15:42

Why do you have to sleep on the couch because he’s ******* stupid?

fde2blknimout 18

Thursday 25 October 2018 19:11

Because shes a biter. And apparently goes to school with raccoons. In the woods. Im starting to think there is no boy friend and that she lives alone. Or maybe shes a dog. I mean a bitch.

Phillycheeze 20

Thursday 25 October 2018 15:48

Time for a mew boyfriend. He is a dumbass...

MA_medQ 7

Thursday 25 October 2018 16:25

adjwejaelwkdc 21

Thursday 25 October 2018 17:10

It's not so much that your life sucks as it is that your boyfriend sucks.

Rabite 28

Friday 26 October 2018 18:23

Nah, normally being stupid makes you happy.

dcharold 11

Thursday 25 October 2018 17:16

Why isn't he sleeping on the couch? Oh yeah, he's a wuss...

raganerus 17

Thursday 25 October 2018 18:00

he is really dumb tbh

TxKitten79 10

Thursday 25 October 2018 18:17

What a dumbass. Dont let him kick you out of bed, kick HIM to the curb. and if you dont. then PLEASE make sure you're using protection when he finally starts having sex with you again. Hes too stupid to be allowed to procreate.