Health: Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor...

By Jesse - 10/05/2012 21:22 - United States - Bothell

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 066

You deserved it 2 419

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Same thing different taste

By jonh_215 - 08/04/2011 16:09 - United States

Today, as a going away present after five years of military service and one combat tour, the hospital scheduled me for a prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 040

You deserved it 4 005

Jim Henson lives

By Anonymous - 20/04/2009 17:55 - United States

Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 467

You deserved it 5 128

By Anonymous - 29/04/2013 16:51 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 780

You deserved it 13 332

By Anonymous - 02/07/2009 04:13 - United States

Today, I had a consultation for an upcoming surgery I need done. The doctor (very handsome and in his late twenties) asked me to flex my stomach and act like I was trying to use the bathroom. As I was enjoying him touching my stomach, I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 994

You deserved it 8 644

Creepy nevertheless

By humdrummitydrum - 19/08/2014 20:46 - United States

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 222

You deserved it 6 680

Gender bending

By Anonymous - 03/09/2021 16:59

Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 201

By Anonymous - 08/05/2013 06:42 - United States

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 038

You deserved it 5 542

Relaxed

By Sorry, Doc - 10/09/2022 01:30

Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 962

You deserved it 223

By applegreen - 16/02/2017 15:00 - Ireland - Limerick

Today, while getting a breast exam for some suspicious lumps, I was lying on the table with my boobs exposed and I learned my doctor is afraid of wasps. I had to chase the wasp out whilst topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 587

You deserved it 508

By welp24 - 28/10/2018 03:00

Today, at the age of 25, for the first time in my life, I was lying mostly naked in front of a man while he was inserting something in my body. Too bad that man was a doctor and that thing was a colonoscopy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 199

You deserved it 369

monicadempsy 5

Friday 11 May 2012 8:02

Listen to your Doc damnit!

lukep135 6

Friday 11 May 2012 8:03

I personally like to imagine a fat redneck stroking my rectum during prostate exams, but to each his own

Comments

zurpzurp 4

Friday 11 May 2012 8:46

What?!? It's not true? My Doctor has some "splaining" to do....

pdp_fml 21

Friday 11 May 2012 12:20

You must have seen the I Love Lucy Show.

keepingitnasty 15

Friday 11 May 2012 8:47

Was this doctor in a white, windowless van? I fell for that once too.

Nevereverland 8

Friday 11 May 2012 10:09

Taking a wild guess here butt was he in a santa costume and giving out candy as well?

TarieBoo 2

Friday 11 May 2012 9:13

because that would make it all the less awkward._.

aFreedom127 9

Friday 11 May 2012 9:36

Not that there's anything wrong with a little alien anal probing!

linkinpark98 23

Friday 11 May 2012 9:46

I knew E.T. looked sketchy.....

bogart20 13

Friday 11 May 2012 9:52

Gettin what the doctor ordered

LadyGore 12

Friday 11 May 2012 10:16

That's such a win. Haha

Candice0687 0

Friday 11 May 2012 10:53

Yeah because that would make it less awkward

Ugi 26

Friday 11 May 2012 11:23

It's only awkward when you feel both of the doc's hands on your shoulders....

KhrystinaS 0

Friday 11 May 2012 12:00

That makes things wayyy more awkward

Keywords

Miscellaneous Weddings Awkward Love My ex Friends AITA Jealousy Health Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Relatable Mental health Therapy Covid Argument Kids Parenting Thanksgiving Ironic Medication Cute Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Money Work

The Top

Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 203

You deserved it 17 042

Today, I got a call from a lady who said my husband died in a car accident in Miami. My husband is supposed to be at a business trip in North Carolina, so I told her it must be a mistake. Turns out it was all true. He lied about a business trip and went to Miami with his lover, who was the woman who had called me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 62

The Top

Today, my boyfriend laid his head on my bare chest and said, "You're like my mother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 286

You deserved it 4 370

Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 401

You deserved it 54 306

Today, after many months of physical therapy for my broken ankle and months of going to college with crutches, my doctor suddenly noticed that my bones hadn't grown together properly. I'm going to have to have another surgery and redo my entire year in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 170

You deserved it 160

Today, for the first time in a week, a customer entered my store. He needed to use the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 490

You deserved it 2 375

Today, I had yet another debilitating migraine that kept me awake. In the middle of the night, I heard an owl hooting. Thinking it was cool, I moved closer to the open window to hear better. After a few minutes, I realized it was actually my new neighbor having loud sex. My aunt moved in next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 462

You deserved it 2 346

Today, I went to get new shoes. I'm a pretty tall girl and I have proportional feet. I asked the cute guy who worked there for a size 9.5. He burst into laughter before putting on a shocked face and saying, "Oh wait... You're serious." Goodbye, self esteem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 589

You deserved it 3 208