Intimacy: Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got...

By Anonymous - 30/10/2014 20:55 - United States - College Place

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 010

You deserved it 27 437

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By 530gangsta - 25/04/2017 16:00

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 333

You deserved it 429

By Chip - 21/04/2009 10:51 - Australia

Today, I went to a cosmetic dentist and got a chip in my tooth filled in that I’d had since I was 7. I went out later and my friend jokingly hit my head against the table a few times to make fun of me showing off my teeth. He slipped. I fell. I now have 2 chipped teeth and a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 449

You deserved it 10 444

Great idea

By dumbbb - 27/12/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 264

You deserved it 46 030

Not now, Cooper

By Me. - 27/10/2011 06:40 - United States

Today, I got a boner at the dentist's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 006

You deserved it 8 875

By sstahpp - 20/08/2015 21:24 - South Africa - Pretoria

Today, while I was taking a long relaxing shower, the shower head decided to fly off and hit me in the face. The dentist couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 548

You deserved it 5 026

By toothbreaker - 21/08/2019 16:00

Today, I was wrestling with my boyfriend when I accidentally kneed him in the chin and chipped his front tooth. I broke his real tooth, as well as the fake part from when he chipped it ten years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 555

You deserved it 280

By canucks_chick - 23/10/2011 05:45 - Canada

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 658

You deserved it 21 052

By shubididubbitty - 20/02/2016 18:06 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, on my way to the dentist, I got rear ended by my own dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 333

You deserved it 1 379

By Anonymous - 13/05/2019 12:00

Today, after a trip to the emergency room for severe stomach pain and almost passing out in the shower, I slipped on the wet bathroom floor and broke my two front teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 959

You deserved it 121

By Jarryd - 10/02/2012 05:40 - Australia

Today, I was making out with a girl who I've had a crush on for a while now. It was all going fine until one of my teeth decided to dislodge itself. She promptly spat out the tooth and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 569

You deserved it 7 504

OkapiParade 15

Friday 31 October 2014 0:37

That sounds fapulous

fallencastiel 22

Friday 31 October 2014 0:38

I don't want to know how hard you were masturbating for your hand to chip your tooth

Comments

ldkindasucks 6

Friday 31 October 2014 0:46

"I was giving someone a real beating, then he got a lucky shot"

giantsfan2010 23

Friday 31 October 2014 0:48

Wait, you masturbated so hard you punched yourself in the mouth and chipped a tooth?? That's quite an accomplishment.

captainsmegma 12

Friday 31 October 2014 0:49

After reading this I masturbated to see the physical mechanics of how this could happen. You (a) must sit and stare at your dick while wanking, or (b) have a nasty curve in your ****

KittyyCattyy 9

Friday 31 October 2014 1:21

You're pretty dedicated.

captainsmegma 12

Friday 31 October 2014 2:19

Someone had to take one for the team!

Acid1260 21

Friday 31 October 2014 2:53

Probably the funniest comment I've read haha

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 31 October 2014 5:19

Thank you. I was wondering why the hell he was masturbating towards his face. Did he want to give himself a pearl necklace?

garrett_8614 14

Friday 31 October 2014 5:46

Guess it depends on the position they're in.

megadki14 6

Sunday 2 November 2014 17:23

he could have just been sliding up too fast and hit his lower jaw with his fist

aliciavanham 13

Friday 31 October 2014 0:51

Is that even possible?

itsxok 5

Friday 31 October 2014 0:51

I'm never arm wrestling you with my right arm

annie917 15

Friday 31 October 2014 2:26

How do you know he didn't use his left arm?

MortenM 17

Friday 31 October 2014 9:32

#42 you just don't use your left hand. It's the only rule

Goblin182 26

Friday 31 October 2014 12:39

#82, if left hand is bi-sexual its not cheating.

Hime9908 22

Saturday 1 November 2014 1:09

I use my left hand

Ghost308 11

Friday 31 October 2014 0:51

That's actually quite an amazing accomplishment bro. You took "beating your dick like it owes you money" to the next level

Arthurie 30

Friday 31 October 2014 1:40

"Beating your dick like it owes you money." I have never seen someone use that phrase before, but let me tell you it might just be one of the best things I've ever heard.