Intimacy: Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got...

By Anonymous - 30/10/2014 20:55 - United States - College Place

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 010

You deserved it 27 437

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Same thing different taste

By 530gangsta - 25/04/2017 16:00

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 333

You deserved it 429

By Chip - 21/04/2009 10:51 - Australia

Today, I went to a cosmetic dentist and got a chip in my tooth filled in that I’d had since I was 7. I went out later and my friend jokingly hit my head against the table a few times to make fun of me showing off my teeth. He slipped. I fell. I now have 2 chipped teeth and a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 449

You deserved it 10 444

Great idea

By dumbbb - 27/12/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 264

You deserved it 46 030

Not now, Cooper

By Me. - 27/10/2011 06:40 - United States

Today, I got a boner at the dentist's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 006

You deserved it 8 875

By sstahpp - 20/08/2015 21:24 - South Africa - Pretoria

Today, while I was taking a long relaxing shower, the shower head decided to fly off and hit me in the face. The dentist couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 548

You deserved it 5 026

By toothbreaker - 21/08/2019 16:00

Today, I was wrestling with my boyfriend when I accidentally kneed him in the chin and chipped his front tooth. I broke his real tooth, as well as the fake part from when he chipped it ten years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 555

You deserved it 280

By canucks_chick - 23/10/2011 05:45 - Canada

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 658

You deserved it 21 052

By shubididubbitty - 20/02/2016 18:06 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, on my way to the dentist, I got rear ended by my own dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 333

You deserved it 1 379

By Anonymous - 13/05/2019 12:00

Today, after a trip to the emergency room for severe stomach pain and almost passing out in the shower, I slipped on the wet bathroom floor and broke my two front teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 959

You deserved it 121

By Jarryd - 10/02/2012 05:40 - Australia

Today, I was making out with a girl who I've had a crush on for a while now. It was all going fine until one of my teeth decided to dislodge itself. She promptly spat out the tooth and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 569

You deserved it 7 504

OkapiParade 15

Friday 31 October 2014 0:37

That sounds fapulous

fallencastiel 22

Friday 31 October 2014 0:38

I don't want to know how hard you were masturbating for your hand to chip your tooth

Comments

yourwifelovesme 25

Friday 31 October 2014 4:26

somehow i dont think thats the kind of "oral" you were fantasizing about

zombiekiller52 24

Friday 31 October 2014 4:30

That's a good story he will be telling his mates. Lol

DenverTyrrell 13

Friday 31 October 2014 4:36

How furiously do you have to be doing it for that to happen XD

Mattaguirre_ 15

Friday 31 October 2014 4:41

hulk smash!

Rooters24 8

Friday 31 October 2014 4:47

penis

starcaller17 16

Friday 31 October 2014 4:49

Masturbation is a sin!!

Caelophile 8

Friday 31 October 2014 4:53

Just slow down a bit, buddy.

Chiroptera_Man 10

Friday 31 October 2014 5:06

When I chipped my tooth, they asked how. If they asked too, what did you say...?

Nancylb 3

Friday 31 October 2014 5:12

Haha. OMG. THIS IS HILARIOUS

Jinxsie 27

Friday 31 October 2014 5:19

Sometimes I wish I had a dick... Did you still finish?

Keywords

Kids Money Health Work Christmas You're fired Fat Bodyshaming Customers Facebook Am I overreacting? Social Media Love AITA Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Miscellaneous Technology Education Students Relatable Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, and ever since I told my wife I had sacked my secretary, a pretty redhead, I’ve noticed my wife has started reverting to her old habit of getting headaches on Fridays, which is normally sex night. Funny how this wasn’t a problem when I had a pretty secretary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 994

You deserved it 1 050

Today, I was working a concert ticket booth. A lady gave me her ticket, I punched it, and told her to enjoy the show. She asked for the “hotel.” Apparently, she thought that the concert ticket cost included a hotel stay, since she traveled from out of state. She cussed me out and had to be escorted out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 333

You deserved it 76

The Top

Today, my mom took a picture of me. All she could say about the picture was, "At least your sister is pretty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 017

You deserved it 3 971

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 724

You deserved it 2 815

Today, I discovered that my very recent ex-fiancé tried to bang his sister-in-law several times while we were still together. The best part? She’s my son's teacher and she waited until we'd broken up to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 716

You deserved it 333

Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 890

You deserved it 326 599

Today, I woke up to see my cat crawling out my window onto the roof. Afraid he was going to jump to the ground, I crawled out my window as well. I caught him. The neighbors caught me in my underwear and bra yelling at my cat on the roof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 190

You deserved it 25 157

Today, I woke up after a long night of taking care of my drunken husband. I guess I should feel lucky I don't have a generic, "He wet the bed in his sleep" story, and instead have a unique, "He got out of bed and peed on me" story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 132

You deserved it 1 154

Same thing different taste

Great idea

Not now, Cooper

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