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Just reply to her: "I have crooked teeth, you're ugly.... I can get my teeth fixed"
When I got braces (14yrs old) my "best friend" laughed and made fun of me calling me every typical braces insult you can think of. Barely 3 mos later, he also got braces....but suddenly had a change of heart and claimed braces are cool to have. And got mad at me for hurling the same insults he used towards me.
I would tell her she looks like a cross between kermit the frog amd mrs piggy
That's the best friend we all need :)
Only a true friend would feel comfortable saying something like that.
you need a new friend
Keywords
When you get braces, beaver chomp her nose.
Good thing she held her tongue before you decided to get them fixed. You should commend her on her upcoming boob job. "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought for sure you'd do something about those."