Kids: Today, I heard a baby crying while I was walking down the street....

By failbaby - 02/06/2009 06:18 - United States

Today, I heard a baby crying while I was walking down the street. I walked around until I found it. In a dumpster. I immediately called the cops, completely freaking out. When the cops came, they pulled the baby out of the dumpster. It was a plastic baby doll. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 558

You deserved it 24 215

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Same thing different taste

Baby steps

By Anonymous - 24/08/2018 13:00

Today, my class got baby dolls for the week to teach us how to be good parents. After school, I went to the store with my mom with the baby doll. When I got home, I realized that I left the baby doll in a shopping cart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 522

You deserved it 2 831

Smooth delivery

By Evol1nOC - 11/01/2022 22:59

Today, I was found out when I was a baby, I was abandoned in a dumpster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 348

You deserved it 159

Get back here!

By ireallylikecats - 22/04/2015 13:31 - United States

Today, I saw a lady with a stroller in the park. She stopped at the water fountain and got a drink, then left without her baby. I ran to the stroller and started rolling it after her. Two grown men attacked me, accusing me of trying to steal said baby. Turns out it was a baby doll. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 305

You deserved it 2 600

Abandoned

By Anonymous - 04/04/2020 05:00

Today, I found a baby in a cradle on my doorstep. I was shocked that someone would do this, so I picked it up and uncovered the baby. It was actually a rudimentary stink bomb that went off in my face when I uncovered it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 189

You deserved it 256

Good samaritan

By Anonymous - 09/10/2010 23:32 - Antigua and Barbuda

Today, I passed a car, and heard a baby crying in the back seat. It was hot and no one was around. All the doors were locked so I broke it with a rock, cutting my arm and setting the alarm off. Only to find out that it was a realistic baby doll. I have to get 7 stitches and pay for the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 301

You deserved it 9 441

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 06:36 - United States

Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 609

You deserved it 3 176

Bad boy

By tatortot7707 - 13/01/2011 04:42 - United States

Today, when I went to pick my kid up from daycare, I found out that he had run away. The rest of my afternoon consisted of me screaming his name, looking for him. I then returned to the daycare center. He thought it would be funny if he hid in the trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 013

You deserved it 3 817

By loueb17 - 15/02/2009 05:57 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a 5 year old boy. When I was on the phone with my mom, he called 911 and started to cry. When I got off the phone the police were at the door. It turns out that the "emergency" was that the VCR was not working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 187

You deserved it 9 732

Hobbies

By Stinkycar - 05/06/2017 12:00

Today, it was an unusually hot day and I saw one of my friends walking down the street carrying a large bag. I stopped and asked if he needed a ride. When he got in, I noticed a horrible stench. He then told me he'd just been dumpster diving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 675

You deserved it 544

By jshi8 - 04/08/2011 14:35 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 850

You deserved it 79 905

Aelaena 6

Tuesday 2 June 2009 12:05

You should have looked inside because if there really was a baby I would have went straight in, not wait for the cops.

redbluegreen 40

Tuesday 2 June 2009 12:10

You should've checked mate, but your heart's in the right place. I think. If it was a real baby, it could've died between the time you heard it and the time the police came in.

Comments

madeingeorgia 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 19:18

Yeah, I agree with everyone else! If I thought for one second there was a baby in there, I would go trash digging before I made time to call the cops!

iMuffinTop 0

Friday 8 April 2011 20:21

You'd think you would look, but noooo.

fyl11122233 0

Wednesday 4 May 2011 16:03

powned, by a baby........doll!

carly_rose_02 5

Friday 3 June 2011 2:36

At least you did the right thing. Even though it wasn't a real baby, that's much better than if it was. Whether or not it was a real baby, you're a hero because you actually did something.

henry14a 0

Friday 15 July 2011 15:13

wow the cops probably chewed u out

fatass_ninja 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 5:31

mabye you should have taken the "baby" out of the filthy dumpster while waiting ten minutes for the cops to arrive. I geuss common sense isn't so common.

MRVOlivia 22

Monday 12 September 2011 0:12

That SUCKS dude.......Honest mistake "^_^ ok FYL

ZielZone 4

Thursday 29 September 2011 22:23

Thank you OP, for lowering the expectations of stupidity to yet another level

islander03 5

Saturday 17 December 2011 16:47

so if it were a real baby you wouldn't pull it out? Maybe if you had acted with common sense you would have saved yourself the embarassment and wouldn't waste the officers' time.

funny_but_sad 4

Tuesday 26 June 2012 2:05

One time my step sister put a baby doll about the same size as my baby sister face down on the floor, I took a quick glance at it and for a minute thought it was my baby sister, then I was relieved that it wasn't.