Work: Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook...

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 21:15 - Sweden - Uppsala

Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook my client's emotional outbursts in the courtroom, promising that he'd be on his best behavior from now on. An hour later, he screamed "FUCK YOU!" at the judge for telling him to quiet down. I hate my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 531

You deserved it 4 239

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/03/2016 15:34 - United States - Pomona

Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 202

You deserved it 2 575

Contempt

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 21:59 - United States - Richmond

Today, as a public defender, my client was actually innocent for once. I intended to utterly destroy the prosecution's case and demonstrate his good character. That plan went straight to hell when he showed up heavily intoxicated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 425

You deserved it 1 585

By mustanggt - 10/07/2012 15:39 - United States - La Porte

Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 850

You deserved it 31 224

Thanks bossman

By Anonymous - 11/10/2013 16:43 - United States - Logan

Today, I finally decided to stand up for myself and quit my crappy job working for my abusive father. I gave him a few insults too, to which he reacted by calling the police and claiming I'd threatened to murder him. I spent three hours in jail before they finally let me go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 687

You deserved it 3 921

Cars can **** right off

By Anonymous - 31/07/2022 18:00

Today, I hate the legal profession with a passion, as I just walked out of court where a lawyer, spouting incomprehensible bollocks in Latin, convinced a judge to let a developer bulldoze a children's playground and part of a forest, to build a second multi-storey car park for the shopping centre across the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 982

You deserved it 168

By so embarrassing - 02/08/2016 06:27 - United States - Renton

Today, I got so anxious while trying to fight the ticket I got earlier this month that I passed out in front of the judge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 614

You deserved it 1 527

By chieftain - 09/05/2012 19:34 - Norway - T?nsberg

Today, I am defending a client on trial for perjury. She is a sweet girl and the first person I've loved in years, but she keeps doing everything she can to make herself look guilty in front of the jury. Now I'm having a daily crisis of conscience in the middle of the courtroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 261

You deserved it 5 703

By zl5 - 04/07/2014 23:17 - New Zealand - Masterton

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 123

You deserved it 4 843

Crimefighters

By Anonymous - 03/07/2009 19:56 - Canada

Today, I was at the park with a friend when I said, "Gotta go, sorry. I've got court in an hour." The lady on the bench next to us then loudly complained how disgusting I was for being a criminal and threw her bird seed at me, dirtying my suit. I'm a lawyer with a case in an hour, not a criminal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 400

You deserved it 3 875

The world's greatest dad

By Nat - 06/08/2022 06:00

Today, I'd had enough of my ex-husband ignoring me and our son, so I threatened to take him to court for sole custody. He didn't even hang up the phone to his client, he just told me to go for it because our son isn't really that interesting anyway, not enough to fight to try keep him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 225

You deserved it 226

perdix 29

Thursday 5 December 2013 0:32

A lot of people hate your job.

HKCgrimmjow 15

Thursday 5 December 2013 0:31

Well... Some people are beyond saving. Sucks for you!

Comments

BiffityBiff 10

Thursday 5 December 2013 0:43

Wow. Im sorry OP. I hope you have better clients in the future...

carelessxdanger 9

Thursday 5 December 2013 0:43

well, whatever happens to him is his own fault. you can only do your best at this point.

shhhaaarrron 12

Thursday 5 December 2013 0:52

It's okay OP, you can't control anyone.

cheshirecat13242 32

Thursday 5 December 2013 0:57

Perhaps that's a sign that you should be more picky about your clientele..?

cardinallove 11

Thursday 5 December 2013 1:31

He's probably a public defender

a4s 8

Thursday 5 December 2013 1:17

FYL? After his comment it's F his life, or the judges if u accept ur clients comment

sanecatlady 13

Thursday 5 December 2013 1:22

I once read a joke list of things never to say to the judge while in court. One of them was, "Bite me, you robe-wearing geek". Pretty tame compared to what this client said!

BrotherPhil 35

Thursday 5 December 2013 1:23

Yup, know that one. I know someone whose solicitor won an otherwise simple case for him by keeping him in his seat whilst the other side commited legal suicide. Hard job, but worth every penny he paid him.