Love: Today, I just received the king-sized bed I'd ordered. My boyfriend...

By Miss_Whipped - 14/10/2016 06:04 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I just received the king-sized bed I'd ordered. My boyfriend moved out two days ago when we broke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 227

You deserved it 1 215

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 22:50 - France

Today, my boyfriend moved. He moved from my room... to my housemate's room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 679

You deserved it 3 610

Don't care

By grreeatttt - 31/01/2009 01:57 - United States

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I called him about two minutes after, and he'd already fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 382

You deserved it 35 189

By moikristine - 21/05/2013 10:24 - Norway - Fagerstrand

Today, I got an email saying the gift I'd ordered for my boyfriend of three years had been sent. I ordered it a couple of days ago because I thought he needed cheering up. I guess he found a better way of doing so himself; he broke up with me yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 692

You deserved it 3 226

By nofooddrinkorsex - 25/08/2019 22:05 - United States

Today, my wife and I had our brand new king-size mattress set delivered. After the delivery men left, she informed me that I was no longer allowed to eat or drink in bed. Oh yeah, and we're not having sex on it either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 894

You deserved it 269

By melikeyturtles - 02/11/2011 05:21 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to break up with him since he's always busy, and I haven't seen or spoke to him in almost 2 months. I arrived to find out from his landlord that he'd moved out 3 weeks ago, leaving a note saying that we were over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 304

You deserved it 8 420

By hoody - 22/01/2010 22:27 - United States

Today, I got to sleep in the same bed as the love of my life...and her new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 485

You deserved it 5 915

By dantheman - 24/07/2009 14:56 - United States

Today, I just got a new assignment for the moving company I work for. Two weeks ago my fiancé dumped me and I moved out of the house. Almost all of the furniture was mine and it took forever. The new moving assignment I have is moving her new boyfriend into my old house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 359

You deserved it 2 817

He prefers the dog

By Anonymous - 19/11/2019 14:00

Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 999

You deserved it 370

By sleeping on the floor - 27/01/2015 01:47 - United States - Fairfield

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. It wasn't until the huge fight which ended with us breaking up did I realize that I was snowed in with him. One day down, two to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 671

You deserved it 4 436

By whatever - 24/11/2012 07:02 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my long-distance boyfriend broke up with me. Tomorrow he should be getting the super long love letter that I poured my heart into and sent him a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 239

You deserved it 2 486

kaitlyn520 13

Friday 14 October 2016 13:38

Sorry about the boyfriend :(... But all I'm thinking is "King size bed to myself!!!" All the room to spread out and eat all your food in... I know it's not the same as having someone there to share it with you. I hope you're okay <3

SneakyDeath 15

Friday 14 October 2016 13:41

On the positive side, you do not have to worry about sharing the bed.

Comments

PineapplePizza 15

Saturday 15 October 2016 4:03

Yay giant bed all for you!

jar_of_dirt 4

Saturday 15 October 2016 4:58

who the **** cares you got a huge bed all for yourself like i would prolly nap so hard

Nocranberry 2

Saturday 15 October 2016 11:06

Nice! Now you've got heaps of room for pizza boyfriend and laptop girlfriend.

lestatsbride 3

Saturday 15 October 2016 15:40

on the plus side you now have a big bed all to yourself!! sorry about your break up OP

cuz803 44

Saturday 15 October 2016 17:05

Extra space for you, the tissues, sad music, and a laptop with **** and dating sites!

Mrdusty87 11

Saturday 15 October 2016 22:22

more room for you hun And you can always break it in with a new guy

zaidthunder1 27

Saturday 15 October 2016 22:28

Ok, an investment for the future then!

hannieannie 18

Sunday 16 October 2016 0:19

Sorry to hear about your breakup, but at least you can starfish without anyone stealing the covers !

that_guy31 12

Sunday 16 October 2016 4:27

better than my twin bed which i hang off of

Arshoo14 2

Sunday 16 October 2016 9:31

if you'd like to....you can share it with me :D

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Haircut Cute Relatable Work Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Sex Roommate Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I hit off with a guy I met on Tumblr, and we moved to Discord to chat. We're just friends, but have things in common. Then I accidentally called him while he was driving by clicking the wrong button, because I forgot how to search things up. Now he thinks I'm a creep. Time to build my walls back up again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 281

You deserved it 156

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 809

You deserved it 9 769

The Top

Today, my girlfriend told me that if I shaved, my penis might seem bigger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 066

You deserved it 468

Today, I sleep on the floor every night because my cat has punctured three air mattresses. I was going to get a real bed with my stimulus check, but I broke my leg and had to pay for the doctor's bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 439

You deserved it 346

Today, it's been two weeks since one of my roommates moved out. Despite me telling the postal service he no longer lives here, they're still knocking on my door almost every day with urgent letters addressed to him. I have no idea where he lives now, and am wondering what the fuck he was up to here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 75

Today, my eldest daughter has 'officially' removed herself from our family and will no longer communicate with any of us. Apparently it's my fault that her younger sister is having a baby before her, and she can't be part of a family that 'treats her so unfairly'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 303

You deserved it 4 135

Today, while working security at a welfare office, I had to listen as a claimant gushed about her upcoming Caribbean cruise. I work two jobs and haven't had a vacation since 2006. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 488

You deserved it 2 062

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a math test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 659

You deserved it 4 351

Same thing different taste

Don't care

He prefers the dog

Top comments

Comments