Love: Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette....

By scotto - 23/02/2009 01:21 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 485

You deserved it 3 483

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 922

You deserved it 6 674

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 675

You deserved it 9 515

By Sir Smokalot - 24/09/2009 08:05 - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 216

You deserved it 2 890

Fresh mints

By Julian - 22/12/2008 07:45 - France

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 200

You deserved it 44 960

Ewwwwwww

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 07:35 - Canada

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 866

You deserved it 4 863

By TwiceDaily,Kids - 06/04/2012 00:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 928

You deserved it 5 123

By thatsnice - 09/12/2014 21:19 - United States - Warwick

Today, I confessed to my roommate of 4 years that I'm in love with her. Her response? Sticking her tongue out at me and blowing a raspberry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 097

You deserved it 4 286

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 282

You deserved it 3 004

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 493

You deserved it 318

By leeceetaylor99 - 15/07/2013 16:47 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 883

You deserved it 3 896

poukey 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:15

Second Hand Smoke Breath?

BoredomKills 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:20

it doesn't have to be your roommate.

Comments

stepup0220 0

Monday 28 December 2009 20:49

****.

chappypreston 0

Friday 8 October 2010 19:28

haha funny shit

mrmerino 0

Monday 6 December 2010 3:55

maybe YOU made out with your roommate!!!

albertaboy 7

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:30

She might have tried smoking maybe?

fadingfaith 4

Monday 9 May 2011 4:21

Maybe she smokes behind your back.

Mini_Pedobear 0

Friday 5 August 2011 7:08

so how do u know what it tastes like..

Dr_Jalepenos 0

Friday 2 September 2011 16:34

So using the transitive theory u kissed your guy roomate?

ifinsane 6

Wednesday 30 November 2011 3:53

I'm sorry lieutenant Dan she Tasted like cigarets.

dhiran_singh 16

Thursday 1 December 2011 4:23

Oh noooo

scarthegoth13 3

Monday 9 April 2012 4:05

what a bitch! leave her

Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Cars ADHD Transportation Ironic Vacation Mental health Work Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Annoying Covid Health Kids Shopping Cute Coworkers Dogs Animals Art Photography Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

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Today, my boyfriend is coming over. We haven't seen each other for a while so for a surprise, a few days ago, I decided to shave my pubic hair. I've come up in a huge rash that looks like some sort of infection. Not quite the sexy surprise I was hoping for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 740

You deserved it 6 900

Today, while moving, I asked my wife where she put the alcohol. She told me she threw it out, because it was old. It was Scotch. It's supposed to be old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 110

You deserved it 5 918

The Top

Today, me and my coworkers were making fun of this girl we work with. I drew an ugly but funny picture of her and thought it was fun to email it around the office. I sent it to a coworker named Joann. Or so I thought. I actually sent it to another Joann, who is one of the directors of the company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 3 075

Today, I found a mouse stuck in a glue trap at work. I had to take it home to get it off with oil, and then I released it outside. Twenty minutes later, the cat returned it to me, dead. After that, the dogs dug it up where I buried it. Sorry, mouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 356

You deserved it 448

Today, I found out that the guy I was talking to for over a year, who told me he was dying from Covid, is perfectly fine and he just didn't want to talk to me anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 145

Today, it became apparent that telling your crush you like them isn't worth a response. I mean after all it's not like I'm sitting here not thinking about them and hoping for something to happen. No no, a simple "No thanks" is too much hard work for some. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 391

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with another man. Her main reaction was to get mad at me for not knocking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 884

You deserved it 5 077

Today, my parents said that they bought me a car. I had been begging for one for a year and they always said that I would have to pay for it myself. I got really excited and went to the garage to see my new ride. It was a Hot Wheels car with a note saying, "Save your money". FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 693

You deserved it 31 586

Same thing different taste

Fresh mints

Ewwwwwww

The Taste of Love

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