Intimacy: Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for...

By Buzzie - 02/09/2010 21:09 - United States

Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 566

You deserved it 14 375

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Same thing different taste

By SleepyKirsty - 09/06/2009 13:36 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student flat are. They are so thin in fact, that I can hear the creepy guy next door say my full name over and over again very slowly whilst masturbating rigorously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120 755

You deserved it 5 718

By kazmatazz - 17/05/2012 10:33 - Oman

Today, I found out that the extremely attractive man that works in my building can hear everything I say about him through the paper-thin walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 532

You deserved it 9 100

What's that buzzing?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 17:59 - New Zealand - Invercargill

Today, I thought I was in a relatively soundproof room before I started up my vibrator. It would have been, if the door wasn't wide open behind the curtains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 1 318

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 09:26 - United States

Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 757

You deserved it 35 850

By ShowerStar - 15/08/2012 21:14 - United States - Mequon

Today, I realized that my neighbors can not only hear me singing in the shower through my apartment's paper-thin walls, they also take great delight in recording it so that they can play it at high volume for their friends when they next throw a party. I want to disappear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 990

You deserved it 4 452

By Anonymous - 24/01/2015 07:57 - United States - Houston

Today, at dinner, my downstairs neighbors described how they can hear most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew that it's not my phone that's vibrating at that time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 507

You deserved it 5 975

YELP!

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 12:00 - United States - Brookline

Today, my new neighbours moved in. I had always thought my bedroom wall was soundproof, because my old neighbours never complained about my loud night terrors. Turns out they were just stone deaf. The new ones can hear everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 926

You deserved it 136

The sound of silence

By hearing too much - 03/11/2019 02:00

Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 781

You deserved it 227

By Scholar - 05/09/2012 16:13 - United States

Today, for the second day in a row, I got to hear both of my roommates having sex, through two closed doors and a hallway. This is as I hit my thirtieth month of involuntary celibacy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 462

You deserved it 3 952

Sexy time

By Anonymous - 17/10/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I heard some rhythmic moaning from the apartment next door. It took me 10 minutes to realize that my neighbor was not having it off, she was actually vacuuming her apartment. It's been so long since I've had sex that I can't even recognize the sound of other people having it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 061

You deserved it 4 510

RoccoRox 0

Friday 3 September 2010 1:42

just say, I do have a boyfriend, he's just battery operated ;).

glorialaura21 8

Friday 3 September 2010 1:54

well just say it's your electric toothbrush! ..and you were making noise bc you have sensitive teeth and it hurts when u brush? lol duhh

Comments

KAYRRIE 0

Friday 3 September 2010 9:56

wow. how did u find out?

charbz 0

Friday 3 September 2010 10:00

I can satisfy you

LexSwift 17

Friday 3 September 2010 10:06

I kept reading that as "My parent's walls" I was like, "I'm not understanding!!" and then I read it right lol. Anyway, sucks for you, OP. But when it comes to masturbation, there are two types of people in the world.

LexSwift 17

Friday 3 September 2010 10:08

The ones who admit to it and the ones who lie about it. So it's nothing to be embarrassed about. Sorry. I hit submit by accident. Lol.

shadyecko 0

Friday 3 September 2010 10:15

Today, my apartment walls are so thin that we heard our neighbor using her vibrator for two hours straight. She does this everyday. FML

mickeyinvegas 0

Friday 3 September 2010 10:43

why can't any of these girls live next to me??

meneedlove 0

Friday 3 September 2010 11:59

And how did you get to know that after 3 years? Anyway if I would have lived next to you I would have knocked your door after the first day to help you. lmao

dug44 0

Friday 3 September 2010 12:11

for all he knows, it's a toothbrush. you love the FEEL of an electric toothbrush..... ahhhh, fresh breath......

jweezy89 4

Friday 3 September 2010 12:15

54, congratulations on owning the dumbest quote ever. Human beings are by definition: animals. We have just ascended to the top of the food chain through superior knowledge and the poseable thumb.

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 3 September 2010 14:41

Everyone's saying she's either fat or ugly. Has anyone thought that she could be practicing abstinence? The church is against male masturbation cause guys waste precious seed, but females can go to town all day cause there's no ejaculant (and the multiple ****** thing). *stands back and lets the fight begin*

EvilDave 13

Friday 3 September 2010 15:29

Actually, you and the church is wrong because the verse they point to as being against masturbation is actually talking about someone practicing the withdrawal form of birth control. I really hate religionists who don't know what their own "holy" (or should that be holey) books say.