Health: Today, I listened to a woman take an extremely fragrant crap... - FML

By teeeessst - 13/12/2009 06:26 - United States

Today, I listened to a woman take an extremely fragrant crap while I waited for my pregnacy test result in the Target bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 862

You deserved it 26 089

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By Anonymous - 12/10/2022 02:00

Today, at nine months pregnant, I stopped at a truckstop to use the restroom. I opened an unlocked stall door and stood face to face with a woman bent over wiping. She let out a scream so blood-curdlingly loud, that I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 125

By justine - 13/12/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, I went to see a play. I'm pregnant, so I always need to pee. At intermission, I ran to use the bathroom, but there was a really long line. I asked the woman in front of me if I could pass her. She responded, "You don't look pregnant!", and lectured me about lying while I peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 978

You deserved it 3 135

By Anonymous - 16/03/2013 17:31 - Sweden - Karlskrona

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I'm pregnant, though I don't really suffer from morning sickness. I do however suffer from sympathy puking, which kicked in with horrifying consequences when someone burst in and started vomiting in one of the other stalls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 945

You deserved it 2 574

By babs - 07/05/2013 19:07 - United States

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 170

You deserved it 4 751

By N/A - 25/09/2012 04:13 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 473

You deserved it 2 841

By Gasman - 15/07/2017 15:30 - New Zealand

Today, I was sitting in the doctor's waiting room and thought that I was alone. I let rip two massive farts before realising there was a very short woman behind the computer screen at the desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 510

You deserved it 3 149

By facepalm - 14/06/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I really had to go to the bathroom. Due to my fear of public restrooms, I made sure it was clear before I started. I heard someone sigh halfway through. Embarrassed, I waited a full ten minutes before leaving the stall, only to see that it was only the automatic air freshener. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 965

You deserved it 35 786

By Anonymous - 16/07/2013 04:41 - United States

Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 197

You deserved it 3 373

By missy - 09/03/2009 22:54 - United States

Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 429

You deserved it 8 668

Take a break

By Anonymous - 04/05/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 453

You deserved it 114

Next

Top comments

harmony88 0

Sunday 13 December 2009 12:24

Surely you could have waited until you were at home to take the test....

juliadream 0

Sunday 13 December 2009 12:25

...why the Target bathroom? As opposed to the privacy of your own bathroom...?

Comments

killogic 0

Monday 14 December 2009 6:21

its your fault for being in the. wsy of their flatulence.

in_wonderland 1

Monday 14 December 2009 12:01

hahahahaha

joethebiden 8

Monday 14 December 2009 16:15

What happens in a Target bathroom stays in a Target bathroom. Seriously though, YDI. Public restrooms are for taking a leak or a dump. She used it for its purpose, you didn't, so don't complain.

ThreadingFate 0

Monday 14 December 2009 16:27

Why the hell would you take a pregnancy test in a Target bathroom? Lmfao FYL for that.

ultraslick 0

Monday 14 December 2009 18:24

What kind of hick are you? YOu're gonna take one of the most important tests in your life in a Target Washroom???? I wouldn't even pee in a target washroom

xNephilim 18

Friday 27 August 2010 4:12

I hope you have to pee in some sort of store, hopefully Target, one day. I'd love to hear how it was to pee in your pants because you don't pee in the bathroom.

TheMischiefMaker 0

Monday 14 December 2009 18:38

YDI. next time, dont be ghetto and take a very private pregnancy test in a store bathroom. are you kidding me?

chyna417 0

Monday 14 December 2009 18:53

I guess I'm wandering why the Target bathroom to take a pregnancy test? Even if you didn't want anyone to know what you were doing at home, don't you have a lock on the door to stop them from entering? Either way, YDI because you were in a Target BATHROOM where people are expected to poop.

jenniferyoung120 0

Monday 14 December 2009 20:12

i feel like thats what you get for taking a pregnancy test in the target bathroom.....

HelloItsSam 0

Monday 14 December 2009 21:58

I agree

MangeMoi_fml 0

Tuesday 15 December 2009 1:28

Uhmm...yu against takin pregnancy tests at home?

MangeMoi_fml 0

Tuesday 15 December 2009 1:27

Uhmm...yu against taking pregnancy tests at home?..

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The Top

Today, at work, I handed an old man his drink, and our fingers accidentally brushed. He gave me a creepy wink and a smile, but I ignored it. He's now been sitting in the store for two hours watching me. Only four hours to go until I get off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 829

You deserved it 2 483

Today, my girlfriend’s mom just got engaged to her boyfriend and he claimed it was me that inspired him to ask her. My girlfriend hates him, so to say I’m in the doghouse is an understatement, I’m lucky to still be in the garden, never mind the doghouse, and I have no idea what I did to inspire him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 62

The Top

Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 311

You deserved it 6 197

Today, I finally treated myself and bought my first moisturizer. The woman at Sephora promised it would "retexturize my face." If by "retexturize" she meant, "make it feel like a rubber balloon," then she was right on the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 816

You deserved it 2 323

Today, my mom sent me beautiful candlesticks along with some half burned candles. I thanked her. She told me the candlesticks were a wedding gift to my grandmother 85 years ago. Then she said the candles were used at my grandma's wedding. I had already lit them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 410

You deserved it 8 209

Today, my mom and I flew three hours from Wyoming to a volleyball camp in Kentucky. When we arrived, we went to the volleyball center and told them I was there for the volleyball camp. They told me it had been cancelled two weeks ago and they forgot to call us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 526

You deserved it 3 993

Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 207

You deserved it 4 187

Today, I reached my exam center late after taking the wrong metro twice, only to find out that I forgot my calculator at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 385

You deserved it 1 194