Miscellaneous: Today, I put on my "fat jeans" because none of my other jeans... - FML

By Anonymous - 29/06/2009 17:55 - Canada

Today, I put on my "fat jeans" because none of my other jeans fit. Neither do my fat jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 898

You deserved it 46 648

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Same thing different taste

By FML - 30/08/2009 14:15 - United States

Today, I had to buy another pair of "fat jeans", because my old "fat jeans" became my new "skinny jeans." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 295

You deserved it 58 971

XXL

By Anonymous - 07/08/2020 23:01

Today, after losing 20 pounds, I decided to purchase new clothes. All of the clothes at the store were still too small for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 355

You deserved it 282

By Voltron - 11/01/2012 00:37 - United States

Today, I have to go on a diet, because I can't afford to buy bigger clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 783

You deserved it 37 620

By Fluffyman - 10/08/2019 04:00

Today, I realized that I haven’t lost weight. All my clothes have just stretched to fit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 382

You deserved it 313

Poor excuse

By worstwaytodumpagirl - 28/12/2013 22:34 - United Kingdom - Harrow

Today, my boyfriend bought me a pair of jeans. I couldn't fit into them, and he reacted to this by saying I've gotten too fat for him, and he can't be with me anymore. I took them off and saw they were a size 4. I've been a size 8 for the past 2 years, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 033

You deserved it 3 565

Appropriate attire required

By Anonymous - 11/03/2023 18:00 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. I was feeling good about it, until I realized that I'd forgotten my workout clothes and was wearing jeans. As I attempted to do squats in my tight jeans, I split them down the middle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 1 009

By Fatty Fatty Fatso - 05/05/2013 00:41 - United States - Somers

Today, I learned that my mother counts my jeans as two pairs when she counts how many she's putting in for a load of wash. I've gotten that fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 641

You deserved it 39 101

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 07/10/2009 01:11 - Canada

Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 434

You deserved it 6 823

Forgetting something?

By Julez - 14/01/2012 16:14 - United States

Today, I was trying on some new pants in the fitting room at a store. I was so overcome with joy when I noticed that I had dropped two pant sizes, that when I took them off and went outside to pay for them, I realized I forgot to put back on my original jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 318

You deserved it 13 692

By xkellybabyyx - 25/11/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I was walking through the streets with my best friend, feeling confident in my new skinny jeans. My friend said, "you really should be wearing a thong with those pants, your underwear line is showing". I was wearing a thong, those lines were just my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 907

You deserved it 40 666

Next

Top comments

kels_bets21 0

Monday 29 June 2009 23:24

what do you usually wear then ? because you don't just gain enough weight to fit nothing overnight.

yep_me_again 0

Monday 29 June 2009 23:41

I gained 80 lbs over college....you know what helped me lose the weight? Exercise and not being online whining about my weight and reading fml. Unless you have a thyroid problem, or another medical condition, ydi!

Comments

reggie77 0

Friday 12 March 2010 3:09

go naked!! just kidding

fast7fast 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 5:29

im really sick of all the assholes on fml.... op eat a lil healthier and do som exersize...start off small until u get use to it and then go big eventually....and all the assholes need to LAY THE **** OFF

KRYPTON1T3 5

Friday 25 February 2011 21:55

ydi for being a fat slob.

swimchamp922 1

Wednesday 1 June 2011 21:40

this made my day

wayneald 0

Monday 27 June 2011 2:15

try this years weight loss tool. a fist size cork

IamNOTobligated 0

Monday 18 July 2011 21:27

******' DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!

PrimeStarscream 30

Friday 29 July 2011 4:30

Stop eating, fatty.

rottentomatoes 7

Friday 26 August 2011 0:00

So she didn't actually put her fat-pants on..

mmmkayyy 6

Thursday 8 March 2012 0:46

Why would you even post on FML if you know everyone is just gunnu shoot you down cuz your fat as ****...attention ***** you make me want to spit in your face.

nabee26 15

Friday 29 June 2012 15:56

Ummm.... Think that means "lose some freaking weight".... Dayammmm people always bitching about being "fat" but then never DO anything about it. So stop complaining and do something about it!:

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The Top

Today, I took my 8 year-old daughter to an airplane museum to show her the kinds of aircraft I’ve worked on during my 30+ year career. In the first 15 minutes, I had grease on my new shirt, bumped my head, spilled coffee and cut my hand. Sums up my career. Only 10 more years to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 237

Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 335

You deserved it 4 257

The Top

Today, I got lost at Best Buy. Meanwhile, my mom freaked out, and they called out my name over the intercom. When I walked up to the desk and they saw I was 17, the employees burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 052

You deserved it 4 439

Today, I went to mediation with 5 managers and a coworker I do not get along with. Everyone in the room was at least 20 years younger than me, and the entire meeting was them telling me to drag myself into the present century and basically do whatever the younger, "smarter" people say, or else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 380

Today, my sister and I heard a buzzing noise in our parents' bedroom, so we went to investigate. It was coming from a drawer, so we opened it. Inside, a battery-operated dildo was flapping around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 542

You deserved it 5 644

Today, I asked my son what his goals in life are. He said he doesn’t have any career goals, and the only thing he wants out of life is to play Dungeons and Dragons. I have failed as a parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 246

You deserved it 696

Today, I called my daughter a wimp and insisted her pain can't be that bad. She left in tears. Later, I got a call from her doctor informing me that she has trigeminal neuralgia, one of the most painful diseases known to man. I'm an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 577

You deserved it 10 477

Today, I got dumped for not "walking the talk" by someone who'd laid a whole bunch of relationship ground rules on day one, and conveniently violated each one of them in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 210

You deserved it 238