Miscellaneous: Today, I realised a second too late why trying to hack a popcorn... - FML

By fmyarse - 22/07/2012 22:45 - United Kingdom - Blairgowrie

Today, I realised a second too late why trying to hack a popcorn kernel out from between your teeth with a steak knife is really a bad idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 596

You deserved it 48 919

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Out it comes

By emilyupsidedown - 16/01/2010 05:08 - United States

Today, I got a popcorn kernel stuck in my throat. It was quite irritating so thought I could get it out with my finger. Good thing, the kernel is gone. Bad thing, I now have the rest of my lunch on my shirt as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 041

You deserved it 31 802

OK, now that's gross

By CM112 - 27/10/2019 06:00 - South Africa

Today, I found a piece of a popcorn kernel stuck in my teeth. I haven't eaten popcorn in over a week and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 891

You deserved it 1 263

By Dipping Tired - 20/04/2016 23:17 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, while half asleep, I dipped my finger in ketchup instead of a fry, and bit down on it so hard I needed stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 757

You deserved it 7 197

By monkeycannon7 - 24/04/2012 16:36 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 346

You deserved it 29 704

By Corn-ed-Teeth - 30/04/2019 18:00

Today, I bit into a barbecue-ed corn cob, forgetting I had a filling on my chipped front tooth. I re-chipped it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 494

You deserved it 784

Hangry dude

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 20:01

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 248

By Anonymous - 27/02/2014 14:34 - United States - Fort Collins

Today, I learned that no matter how much you want the Nutella, it's never a good idea to deep-throat the knife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 052

You deserved it 61 215

Pop pop pop

By csully - 10/01/2009 06:34 - France

Today, I made some popcorn. Returning to the kitchen a couple of minutes later, I realized I was supposed to put a cover on the saucepan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 175

You deserved it 26 812

Slicy slicy

By nessacadesa - 24/03/2009 04:47 - United States

Today, I was telling my younger brother and sister how important it is to know how to use a knife properly, all while slicing potatoes. Just as I was saying how stupid people can be with knives, the potato slipped on the counter. I sliced open my hand while talking about knife safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 989

You deserved it 58 483

By 8sq - 11/06/2011 01:32 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 605

You deserved it 16 358

Next

Top comments

iipinkette 16

Monday 23 July 2012 2:24

Why on earth didn't you use floss?

Bluemonster3 26

Monday 23 July 2012 2:26

Why did you think it was a good idea in the first place? o_o

Comments

Raelthelamb 31

Monday 23 July 2012 22:55

How could anyone think that's a good idea?

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Tuesday 24 July 2012 0:49

Ever heard of a wonderful invention called floss? Its purpose is to remove things from between your teeth without hurting them or your gums. It's a fantastic little thing, I strongly recommend it.

kikikimsicles 0

Tuesday 24 July 2012 1:06

I'm sure most 10 year olds would know too. Smh.

Salinnax3 2

Tuesday 24 July 2012 2:26

It's time to get those teeth drilling.

maccmiles 8

Tuesday 24 July 2012 5:09

It's called a toothpick... Try it sometime

ktto14 2

Tuesday 24 July 2012 6:25

u stupid..

wpolo02 7

Tuesday 24 July 2012 7:14

You good sir, are a fucktard.

wpolo02 7

Tuesday 24 July 2012 7:17

So I think this is the movie Idiocracy irl

KiddNYC1O 20

Tuesday 24 July 2012 7:18

Uhm. Toothpick?

BriZanna33 2

Tuesday 24 July 2012 7:36

Today I REALIZED you don't know how to spell...

Karenmarynn 8

Tuesday 24 July 2012 8:51

He's from the UK. Therefore, he does not use the Americanized version of "realise."

6
7
8
9
10
11

Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Cars ADHD Transportation Ironic Vacation Mental health Work Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Annoying Covid Health Kids Shopping Cute Coworkers Dogs Animals Art Photography Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

The Top

Today, my boyfriend is coming over. We haven't seen each other for a while so for a surprise, a few days ago, I decided to shave my pubic hair. I've come up in a huge rash that looks like some sort of infection. Not quite the sexy surprise I was hoping for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 740

You deserved it 6 900

Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 372

You deserved it 1 985

The Top

Today, I took a big sniff of a flower in my garden. I spent the rest of the morning blowing little bugs out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 847

You deserved it 18 291

Today, I used the phrase "bitch please" in real life. It was funny until the "bitch" bitch-slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 468

You deserved it 34 069

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 057

You deserved it 3 413

Today, I was on the phone with an elderly customer at work. I had to spend 10 minutes listening to him describe how the underwear he bought was too tight and caused his bladder to leak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 504

You deserved it 2 855

Today, my husband told me he's just "not interested" in having sex anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 190

You deserved it 1 736

Today, I got home after a rough day and was really looking forward to some cuddles from my cat. I opened the door and she came running toward me, which was unusual, so I knelt down to embrace her. She ran right past me to get to the tuna sandwich I'd unwittingly dropped on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 177

You deserved it 311