Miscellaneous: Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as...

By stoggie96 - 22/04/2012 15:34 - United States - Wooster

Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as "the bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 565

You deserved it 29 124

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By rosabelle91 - 17/06/2012 14:58 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I realised that my boyfriend calls me "bitch" more often than he calls me by my actual name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 443

You deserved it 14 793

By maggu - 11/02/2013 04:26 - Denmark

Today, my mom started referring to me as "The Bitch". When I asked her why, she said that I have always been a bitch, but I was never old enough for her to actually call me a bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 192

You deserved it 7 426

By Anonymous - 23/07/2016 23:04 - United States - Atlanta

Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 871

You deserved it 19 272

By stupid_world - 24/12/2009 06:02 - Canada

Today, I learned that while anybody can call me a bitch, my husband got mad at his aunt for calling our dog a mutt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 756

You deserved it 3 739

By Embarrassed - 22/08/2013 04:40 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I was playing Charades with my boyfriend's family. When it was his turn, he pointed at me. His mother said "Bitch?" The answer was "relationship". FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 816

You deserved it 4 351

Mr Mad

By Sorry Sir - 12/07/2023 11:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my husband got angry at me, only because I addressed him by his own name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 174

By Anonymous - 29/07/2012 20:34 - United States - Johnston

Today, after a busy afternoon taking care of the kids, I was feeling really down about only being a mom these days, and I was hoping my husband would make me feel better when he got off work. In the middle of cuddling, he called me "mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 818

You deserved it 4 014

Ironic, isn't it?

By KC. - 25/04/2012 20:06 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 493

You deserved it 8 745

Mom! No!

By Mnnn - 18/07/2023 18:00

Today, I angrily scolded one of my employees for making an avoidable mistake for the third time. Unfortunately, my mother decided to pay me a surprise visit, and arrived mid-rant. She chewed me out for being mean and made me apologize. Now everyone at work calls me "mama's boy" and nobody takes me seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 1 080

Leech

By upyours - 22/05/2020 17:00 - Australia

Today, after telling my boss that trailing a hand up someone's leg and leering at them constantly is counted as sexual harassment, I got called an "unappreciative little whiny bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 098

You deserved it 212

videokid2000 10

Sunday 22 April 2012 19:49

Be nicer, then.

adzz90 16

Sunday 22 April 2012 19:51

Don't be a bitch then

Comments

elerbears 9

Sunday 22 April 2012 19:57

make them a sandwich and they will stop :)

kalgon 0

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:44

You are correct!

itsharkley 8

Sunday 22 April 2012 21:35

Y U no get it wrong?!

Ruffclue 9

Sunday 22 April 2012 21:36

Someone is thinking outside of the box.

jessikamahone 6

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:03

You must've done something wrong.

Cad6 24

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:40

You don't say?

dancer1103 2

Sunday 22 April 2012 19:58

It's a term of endearment.

KatrinaKitten 16

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:01

So they call her The B (shouts loudly) itch...(whisper).

mea_iloveskiing 26

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:01

Bitch please

The_Hitdude 12

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:07

WTF? What's up with the comments disappearing?

SkoomaKi 27

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:10

FML has been extremely glitchy for a while :/

SpottedZebra42 14

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:28

There are multiple comment number 2's, 3's, and so on for me.

SkoomaKi 27

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:40

47 - Same here, my iPod is trying to handle it all! I wonder what's happening....

alfred07 18

Sunday 22 April 2012 21:05

That has been happening to me too.

TheGewt 7

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:06

Ah, father-son bonding at its finest.

Epichearts 2

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:01

Then most likely you are a bitch.

The_Hitdude 12

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:02

They wouldn't say it if it wasn't true.

gonad_gobbler 1

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:02

Stop being such a female dog then.

Lauren324 18

Sunday 22 April 2012 20:09

You obviously need to change something!

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Weddings Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Health Relatable Mental health Therapy Argument Parenting Kids Thanksgiving Covid Medication Ironic Cute Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money

The Top

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 189

You deserved it 11 246

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 23

The Top

Today, at my catering job, a woman left me a fake £10 note as a tip, which was actually one of those stupid invitations to attend her church, since "God is more valuable than cash." I have two kids and a wealthy ex refusing to pay support, so I’d have preferred no tip at all instead of this bullshit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 053

You deserved it 157

Today, I moved into my new house. I went over to my neighbors' house to introduce myself. As they opened the door I saw a telescope pointed at my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 593

You deserved it 2 979

Today, I found out via Facebook that my once-favourite aunt has fully bought into the QAnon bullshit about the "stolen" US election, bible quotes and all. We live in the UK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 186

Today, I pulled my motorcycle into a wheelie when my crush drove by. She was the one who drove me to the hospital when I went over backward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 081

You deserved it 52 710

Today, my best friend's parents posted her wedding date on Facebook. My best friend got engaged a few months after I did. The only wedding plan I have come up with so far is a Fall 2022 wedding. My best friend is also planning a Fall 2022 wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 759

Today, my kids tried to make grilled cheese by turning the toaster sideways. When all was done, it all flew out onto the kitchen floor. Both my kids and my husband left the mess there for me to clean up when I got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 394

You deserved it 3 268

Same thing different taste

Mr Mad

Ironic, isn't it?

Mom! No!

Leech

Top comments

Comments