Intimacy: Today, I realized that I'm so depressed that I can't even watch... - FML

By jakeeey - 18/01/2013 01:16 - Canada - Brampton

Spicy

Today, I realized that I'm so depressed that I can't even watch porn without getting upset about how I can't get laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 192

You deserved it 10 936

Valentine's Day: Love and Maladresse
Discover romantic anecdotes with a touch of awkwardness - because nothing expresses love better than a little discomfort! More…

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Same thing different taste

Medication shutdown

By Anonymous - 29/09/2011 09:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses me more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 929

You deserved it 4 961

By MyHeadHurts - 20/01/2012 10:42 - Ireland

Spicy

Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 214

You deserved it 39 614

By damnit - 16/10/2009 17:27 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 722

You deserved it 4 275

Crank

By Anonymous - 29/03/2013 04:11 - United States - Houston

Spicy

Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 727

You deserved it 21 485

By the critic - 18/06/2012 10:22 - Canada - Saint Catharines

Spicy

Today, I realized I have been single for far too long when I was turning off porno after porno because I couldn't stand the horrible acting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 359

You deserved it 6 024

Neverending cycle

By wookieewhosshe - 27/10/2022 03:00 - United Kingdom - Gloucester

Spicy

Today, I stopped watching porn at 6 a.m. to Google if depression makes you not able to cum. I was masturbating because I can't sleep. Insomnia is also a sign of depression. There's no joy at night anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 963

You deserved it 247

By Anonymous - 16/12/2013 07:55

Spicy

Today, I realized how bad my depression has gotten when I caught myself fantasizing about suicide while having sex with my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 015

You deserved it 7 414

Rubbing it in

By Anonymous - 12/03/2022 22:00

Spicy

Today, since splitting up with my girlfriend, I’ve watched so much porn I think I’ve given myself a friction burn on my clit, so now not only does it hurt to even walk normally, it’s way too painful to masturbate, so I’m now horny all the frigging time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 574

You deserved it 1 281

By Anonymous - 03/12/2009 02:37 - United States

Spicy

Today, I would rather pound to porn than have sex with my wife, because trying to get her in the mood is too much hassle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 229

You deserved it 12 779

By montanadinosaur - 26/04/2015 04:05 - United States - Tampa

Spicy

Today, I was watching porn, and ended up bawling because the girl in the video looked like my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 179

You deserved it 10 793

Next

Top comments

Schizomaniac 24

Friday 18 January 2013 9:11

Yeah, I always make girls pass a literacy test before I sleep with them. "I'm gonna rock your world after you identify the adverbs and correctly place commas in this sentence."

igive 29

Friday 18 January 2013 9:00

Go to a bar, roofie up some drinks. If that doesn't work, prison is full of willing people.

Comments

dkakaan 6

Saturday 19 January 2013 2:03

Try escort services ....

Vos26 3

Saturday 19 January 2013 2:17

Get over yourself

youjeanss 4

Saturday 19 January 2013 4:32

Fun fact: Watching too much **** causes depression and anxiety

Hawaii84 16

Saturday 19 January 2013 5:51

Dude, get off the couch/bed and go out there. There are some horny women out there, go look for them or at least pay for one!

Lycanian 3

Saturday 19 January 2013 15:18

It's not so bad if you get the premium membership.

gemmadaws 3

Saturday 19 January 2013 15:21

Save your money spent on **** and start paying for sex

Scotticus117 11

Saturday 19 January 2013 19:02

with that attitude you wont. confidence is key. besides thats not the end of the world/something to be depressed about it. theres a lot more to life than sex.

innominestanas 6

Saturday 19 January 2013 23:16

I know the feel man.

patkers 1

Saturday 19 January 2013 23:32

You can't get laid if you are at home watching ****. It will make you go blind anyway.

fml0505 22

Monday 21 January 2013 10:43

Been there before man... I also found out that getting laid doesn't fix depression.

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The Top

Today, I was talking to my mother about my sex life, telling her, "If I want to have sex, I'm going to have sex." She looked at me for a moment and said, "You're staying a virgin until you get married." She wasn't ordering me, she was informing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 355

You deserved it 8 605

Today, I'm pretty sure my husband of 8 years is sleeping with the skank who's in the fire department with him. Out of nowhere, he started texting her and wouldn’t come home until 12:30 a.m. for a whole week. When I confronted him about it, he flipped out. Sadly, it won’t be the first marriage she’s ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 236

You deserved it 190

The Top

Today, my husband moved out while I was out of town. The only thing of his he left behind was a copy of Paradise Lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 144

Today, because I was the only manager scheduled, I went into work despite feeling sick to my stomach. While sitting down with a customer, I got the urge to throw up and tried to hold it back. Instead I vomited in my mouth, instinctively swallowed and started choking in front of the customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 800

You deserved it 3 393

Today, I was making mashed potatoes in a hurry, I had the pot boiling on high when I had to rush to the bathroom. As I'm walking away, I ask my boyfriend to watch the potatoes. When I returned, they were no longer boiling and he proudly announced he added cold water because they looked a little dry. What? FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 910

You deserved it 669

Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out of her second story bedroom window, taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned, "My baby's first kiss!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 101 348

You deserved it 7 307

Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 167

You deserved it 2 464

Today, like every month, I need to summon the courage to tell my husband that I’m on my period. When he finds out, he’s gonna go out and sleep with other women until it’s gone. He has “urges” and “needs sex every day” and if I "can’t give it to him someone else will.” I’m disabled and can’t afford to leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 926

You deserved it 185