Intimacy: Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would...

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By IbetIgotAIDS - 12/09/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 807

You deserved it 15 284

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Same thing different taste

By ekaay - 16/01/2018 15:00

Today, whilst cleaning the living room, I heard snickering coming from my bedroom. My two nephews had found my "play cupboard" and were blowing up condoms like balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 055

You deserved it 1 006

By frustrated - 17/08/2013 22:56 - Ireland - Killarney

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 166

You deserved it 7 412

By the_lonely_life - 27/06/2013 01:02 - United States

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 182

You deserved it 7 051

By kahemae44 - 27/10/2009 10:20 - United States

Today, I visited my boyfriend's house excited about the romantic night he promised me. As time passed, we started making out and heading up to his room. Rose petals and candles filled his room. "How romantic", I thought. That is, until we saw his 5 year old sister blowing up condom balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 423

You deserved it 5 567

TMI FML

By eugh - 07/05/2021 14:01 - United States - Midlothian

Today, I discovered the brand of condoms my parents use. It was in the same grocery bag as my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 789

You deserved it 584

By Anonymous - 13/02/2014 15:47 - United States - Kennett

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 525

You deserved it 53 121

By ADickySituation - 05/05/2013 04:14 - United States - Wilmette

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 887

You deserved it 4 939

Gross

By Anonymous - 02/03/2017 17:00 - Canada - Elora

Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 552

You deserved it 1 623

They grow up so fast these days…

By Anonymous - 11/07/2022 06:00

Today, my 5 year-old and I walked in on a girl giving her boyfriend a blow job in the washroom at the playground. Last week we found a crack pipe on the picnic table. So many conversations I wish we could have waited for… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 269

You deserved it 171

By myself - 20/09/2012 07:00 - United States - Seaside

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 464

You deserved it 31 253

omegaxen 0

Monday 12 September 2011 22:57

That blows!

Hockey_fan 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:00

Well that really sucks" That really "Dampened" your spirits That "blows" Well..we all seen it "Coming" ...I'm sorry

Comments

shannyb123 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 3:59

That's really disgusting

cthomb 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:02

Fake

alone_unafraid 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:06

oh snap. yeah... I'd get tested.

Juicy0023 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:12

Epic fail. STDs anyone?

seexysportsbabee 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:12

Omg!!!! Tmi! Yuuucckkyyy!

hayleyjames 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:14

Hahah where did you live? Seedy neighbourhood much?

structuredchaoz 4

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:15

Wow!!!! Where the hell were your damn parents!!!! Fyl, but FYP's for not keeping an eye on you.

bpeppermint16 5

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:22

How do u know where the ****** go??

julisa47 5

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:23

Ewwww hahahahahahah

XxDancerGirlxX 17

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:27

Where the hell were your parents? Www FYL!

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Today, I’ve had to threaten my husband with divorce unless he drops this disgusting and archaic idea of forcing our daughters to do “virginity pledges.” He even wants to rent out a venue and have a “purity ball” to celebrate this nonsense with his caveman friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 696

You deserved it 148

Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 359

You deserved it 38 134

The Top

Today, I finally stood up to my mom and told her that as an introvert I desperately need some time alone to just recover. She, being the bitch queen of the extroverts, translated this in her head to, “I hate this family”, so she screamed at me, called me ungrateful, and made me homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 139

Today, while at Subway, I looked on as an employee killed a fly with his hands. He then continued working without a second thought. He was making my sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 959

You deserved it 4 255

Today, I experienced the old joke about recognising women by their shoes sticking out of the driver and passenger windows. It was my mother's shoes in my mother's car, but the guy happily plowing her on top of the hand-brake was not my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 602

You deserved it 315

Today, I went to see a musical that some school friends had put on. At some point in the show, the main character kicked her leg up in the air, and her high heel flew off of her foot and into the audience. The shoe hit me square in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 140

You deserved it 2 175

Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 462

You deserved it 2 986

Today, I'm a teacher at a primary school, with 20 schools in their network. A week before end of term assessments, they decided to move assessments a week early to allow them to observe data. I have 2 days to teach 2 chapters or my kids will lose 20% of the paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 121

You deserved it 110

Same thing different taste

TMI FML

Gross

They grow up so fast these days…

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