Animals: Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my...

By farksh - 07/03/2015 12:14 - Australia

Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my room. As I went to scoop it up with a tissue, it lurched away and fell near my bed. I can't find it, but I can sure as fuck sense the pure evil coming from it. Looks like I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 188

You deserved it 6 288

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Same thing different taste

By eyes wide SHIT - 28/12/2013 01:37 - Australia

Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 024

You deserved it 5 960

Spooked

By chrskr13 - 28/07/2023 12:00 - Denmark - Soborg

Today, I had to sleep on couch cushions on the kitchen floor because I saw a tiny spider crawl under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 797

By Annie - 24/08/2015 08:46 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was laying on the couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 787

You deserved it 9 267

Leave spiders to chill

By Anonymous - 17/12/2020 14:07

Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 323

Scared to bed

By Anonymous - 14/11/2018 12:00

Today, I'm scared to leave my bedroom. During the night, what must have been a giant spider made a web 4 feet wide stretching from the lightbulb to the tv and then down to the desk corner. It's blocking my path to the door and I can't tell where the 8-legged bastard is hiding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 736

You deserved it 432

Juicy breakfast

By Anonymous - 07/01/2022 01:01 - Canada - Warman

Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 050

You deserved it 160

By somebody - 08/06/2012 23:13 - United States - Lexington Park

Today, when I was laying in my bed, I looked on the opposite side and saw a spider the size of my palm staring at me. And if that wasn't bad, I found out it hops. I still can't find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 371

You deserved it 2 090

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 324

You deserved it 7 652

By igotpride - 09/12/2013 21:01 - United States

Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 822

You deserved it 5 381

By JustLeaveThem - 25/01/2017 18:00

Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 738

You deserved it 292

cutycat136 28

Saturday 7 March 2015 23:53

Okay. Now just don't think of the size of that spider and its long legs taking it all the way to the couch tonight. Good luck OP :)

coming back in the future 30

Saturday 7 March 2015 23:57

Only in Australia.,

Comments

kaed 16

Sunday 8 March 2015 15:44

Rule #1: Always hit twice!

chosha_fml 26

Sunday 8 March 2015 17:28

Rule #2: The Double Tap

VeganDarkLight 31

Sunday 8 March 2015 17:44

YDI for trying to kill it. Just take it outside next time.

SauceySarah 30

Sunday 8 March 2015 19:43

That happened to me before, and I swear I moved all my stuff into the guest bedroom and never moved back into my old bedroom. No joke.

erik_santana 1

Sunday 8 March 2015 20:00

What does OP mean??

Starham1 14

Sunday 8 March 2015 20:11

Why would you hurt the magnificent creatures that kill off the terrible pests that would overrun the planet if not strictly controlled?

Levvy 22

Sunday 8 March 2015 22:38

You tried to kill a harmless animal, failed, and now expect sympathy for the fact you feel bad. Not feeling bad because of guilt or anything, mind, but because of the wholly incorrect worry you have that your hostile actions may have consequences for you.

repKyle95 24

Sunday 8 March 2015 22:40

Couldn't agree more. The spider wasn't doing anything to hurt you, so really if you get bit or anything like that it's only because you brought it upon yourself, OP. YDI

Levvy 22

Sunday 8 March 2015 22:49

She's not even going to get bit. She's just going to fret for a little bit over a completely irrational worry. That makes her the victim in this, apparently. As opposed to the animal she just tried to kill for no reason.