Miscellaneous: Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a... - FML

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By cockroach - 27/09/2009 15:52 - United States

Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a stick to smack it down. When I hit it, it fell and landed in my mouth. Karma much? FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 333

You deserved it 16 757

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Same thing different taste

By no name - 22/02/2011 12:25

Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 974

You deserved it 4 787

Yummy

By munckncruncj15 - 22/10/2009 04:19 - United States

Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 244

You deserved it 36 953

By jaqlove - 02/07/2016 20:28 - United States - Clementon

Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 034

You deserved it 2 647

Those things freak me out

By Gilly - 02/09/2023 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was cooking dinner when I noticed a cockroach on the kitchen counter. I reflexively tried to spray it with what I had to hand, which was window cleaner, but it seems to have pissed it off and flew right at me instead. I screamed and ran out of the kitchen, leaving the roach in charge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 485

By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 18:51 - Mayotte - Mamoudzou

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 290

You deserved it 3 664

By Anonymous - 12/06/2015 05:35 - Australia - Rydalmere

Today, I was studying for a big test I have next Tuesday in my room. I heard a creak in my ceiling but assumed it was nothing as my house is old. Thirty seconds later something fell from my air vent directly onto my head. It was a giant cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 587

You deserved it 2 142

By all5fingers - 08/09/2011 05:23 - Canada

Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 629

You deserved it 3 247

By funyfunkid - 22/12/2009 19:18 - United States

Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over myself and the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 135

You deserved it 47 953

By foxbrat - 11/10/2009 06:18 - United States

Today, I woke up with a dead cockroach and its guts all over my forehead. My boyfriend responded by laughing and saying "Poor guy, never had a chance to see the world." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 239

You deserved it 3 298

Added protein

By Anonymous - 10/02/2021 00:30

Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 955

You deserved it 194

Next

Top comments

NATFLUMP 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:08

OMFG MAN WHY WOULD YOU KEEP YOUR MOUTH OPEN ! dude, you fcking stuuuuuuupid.

prettybadfuckup 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:07

GROSSNESS

Comments

Luckster 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:22

I wish people would look up the definition of Karma before using it in an FML!!

sugar_407 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:23

1. don't say "karma much" 2. why would you smash the roach? Even if it didn't fall, you would have had a blob to clean off the ceiling. 3. close your mouth, idiot. 4. YDI !

01100110 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:36

That's not karma

VoGuE221 5

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:42

...dude why was your mouth open?

frightful316 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:43

LOL. OMB that's freaking funny.

drano 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 20:53

the fml said smack, not smash

goshers 1

Sunday 27 September 2009 21:09

OH **** THAT SUCKS

moopsy234 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 21:15

yummy yummy in my tummy!!! taste like week old tuna... mmmmmm *five hours later* peuk gag "OH NO!!! it's crawling up my throat!!!!" lol but YDI dood

Zikato 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 21:26

Gravity much?

misstragedy 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 21:28

"Karma much?" ruins it. :|

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