Work: Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly...

By weirded out - 11/08/2014 02:22 - United States - Brentwood

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 122

You deserved it 3 737

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Same thing different taste

Not now Dave

By pretty warlock - 24/10/2023 22:00

Today, I had a customer propose to me. I work at Taco Bell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 605

You deserved it 117

Hangry

By Anonymous - 25/06/2009 22:18 - United States

Today, a man from across the bar looked at me, pointed, and said "MMMM, now THAT'S what I want." Offended, I confronted him to tell him I felt disrespected by him referring to me as 'that.' Turns out, he was pointing to the cheeseburger that the waitress behind me was holding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 904

You deserved it 54 725

Typecast

By nerd - 16/10/2009 15:08 - Singapore

Today, I was on cloud nine when the beautiful waitress I frequently ordered takeaways from told me she didn't need to take my name as she remembers me from before. When I got my food, I saw the sales slip. On it she had written, "Cheeseburger - Fries - Coke - Nerdy guy with bad haircut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 422

You deserved it 5 757

By mynameisarmpit - 15/11/2010 06:48

Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came up and was being nice. He said, "What can I get you two gentlemen?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 722

You deserved it 4 670

By Confused and Disgusted - 23/02/2015 23:42 - United States - Sparta

Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 293

You deserved it 2 441

Rude

By -_- - 22/09/2013 18:00 - Canada - Waterloo

Today, I started my new job at a restaurant I really like. As I waited on my first customer, I suggested that he try the apple pie, because it's my favourite. He looked up at me and said, "Yeah? Figures! Lay off 'em, porky!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 390

You deserved it 6 123

I just work here

By stupidapperently - 01/02/2013 04:06 - United States

Today, while checking out a couple at work, I handed them their receipt and wished them a good day. The woman promptly pulled her husband to the side, and whispered to him about how much of a "fucking idiot" I was for making the prices so high. I work at McDonald's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 726

You deserved it 2 411

By Irobot - 15/03/2017 22:00

Today, working at a fast food restaurant, I was berated by a customer for a good two minutes. It's okay though because she ended with, "Sorry, I forget you all are real people." FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 462

You deserved it 348

By Kamburgler - 02/07/2011 06:33 - United States

Today, this really cute guy at work kept flirting with me and cracking the funniest jokes. Before he left, he told me how much he enjoyed making me smile. An hour later, I saw my reflection in a mirror, I had a huge piece of food stuck in my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 388

You deserved it 5 724

You what now?

By foshizzle - 25/04/2012 06:46 - United States - Orlando

Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 979

You deserved it 3 188

Queensland 27

Monday 11 August 2014 12:00

He's lovin' it.

lil_ham1644 29

Monday 11 August 2014 12:02

Sweet promises? What, like "I promise it'll be over soon, you just look so tasty I could eat you up."

Comments

Silly_Lilly6969 23

Monday 11 August 2014 12:14

Was it Fluffy?

njgohard 16

Monday 11 August 2014 15:36

'Cause you could smell it!

fsomelife 26

Monday 11 August 2014 12:16

You mean dessert?

blazerman_fml 17

Monday 11 August 2014 12:16

A way to a man's heart is through his stomach.

Tooorrriii3 22

Monday 11 August 2014 12:17

I thought everyone did this..

PlasmaPorter 12

Monday 11 August 2014 12:21

Carry on my wayward buns, they'll be fries when you are done. Lay your weary buns to rest, dontcha cry no more..

ArashiGirl 13

Monday 11 August 2014 13:10

You my good sir win the internet.

Meettitan 14

Monday 11 August 2014 19:04

Lay your weary bread to rest, don't you fry no more.

anythingmustbe 18

Monday 11 August 2014 12:32

Oh, Baby, They may call me a fool, But I can't help, Our gravitational pull.

Aquaman911 18

Monday 11 August 2014 12:35

Maybe it was Spongebob in disguise...

Vanessa_Leeann26 17

Monday 11 August 2014 12:56

Foodies. They are way too into their food. =

sexual_girl 15

Monday 11 August 2014 13:03

Least he wasn't doing the same to you?

Kstruggles 15

Monday 11 August 2014 13:14

I've kinda done that, when It's like my favourite dish, and I've been craving it for a while.

Keywords

TV shows Miscellaneous Work Awkward Coworkers Politics Transportation Ironic Embarrassing Relatable Instagram Social Media Parenting Shopping AITA Am I overreacting? Jealousy Love Kids Pranks Dogs Friends Housework Cars Technology Porn Sports Health Accident Mental health

The Top

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for "cheating" on him with his best friend. What did I do? I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek when I finally met him in person, after years of hearing about how great he is and how much we would get along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 161

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 744

You deserved it 17 914

The Top

Today, I realized that the only thing that relieves my chronic facial pain is vaping CBD. I previously was very vocal about how much I hate smoking and vaping. My kids think I'm a hypocrite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 1 024

Today, after spending the night with my girlfriend for the first time, I discovered why she would always want to rush home after dinner dates. Her stomach gurgles so loudly after eating, I can hear it in the next room over, with the TV on. This apparently happens no matter what she eats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 852

You deserved it 142

Today, at a bar, I bumped into the hot blonde teacher I had the hots for all through high school, and she actually tried to seduce me. I was only in the bar drowning my sorrows because I recently had my cancerous prostate removed and I can’t get erections any more. Life isn’t fair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 319

You deserved it 141

Today, my mom came in my bedroom without knocking, even though I'd told her to, and caught me masturbating. She stood there in awkward silence before saying, "…Dinner's ready at 6." and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 373

You deserved it 459

Today, I’m a French teacher abroad, and as my beard has a huge hole near my chin, my students call me Wolverine. At every lesson, they wait for me with pens stuck between their fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 123

Today, after suffering from constipation for three days, I finally took a dump. Just as things reached the point of no return, my land line and doorbell all rang. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 222

You deserved it 3 219