Animals: Today, I saw a small bug on the wall, so I decided to send it...

By romainmain - 16/09/2012 22:50 - France - Charleville-m?zi?res

Today, I saw a small bug on the wall, so I decided to send it straight to the insect afterlife by smashing it with a book. The book crushed it, and caused my clock to come free from the wall and crash down onto my TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 933

You deserved it 26 592

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Same thing different taste

By Annie - 24/08/2015 08:46 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was laying on the couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 787

You deserved it 9 267

By bugnose - 16/05/2011 06:26

Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 933

You deserved it 9 132

By Anonymous - 02/08/2009 21:20 - Canada

Today, a moth was flying around my house. Annoyed, I picked up a shoe to crush it with. The moth landed on a light fixture on the ceiling, so I made my move. Dead, the moth slipped gracefully through air and onto my head. So did the light fixture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 823

You deserved it 51 985

By spiderwoman - 15/04/2011 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 299

You deserved it 32 193

By limeiscool - 04/08/2019 04:00

Today, about to fall asleep, a bug started buzzing behind the screen to my window. Losing my sanity, I punched the screen, forgetting all about the glass. I now have a cracked window and one still annoying bug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 1 983

By Jesus - 27/09/2011 02:03 - Canada

Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 261

You deserved it 32 000

By failure461 - 13/06/2011 16:37 - United States

Today, I ruined my computer screen trying to kill a fly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 569

You deserved it 41 938

Lightbulb moment

By Kevin - 17/10/2024 16:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I tried to smack a fly that was buzzing around my room. I ended up hitting the wall a little too hard, scaring my cat, who jumped up and ran under the bed, knocking over a lamp. The fly is fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 145

By Anonymous - 10/09/2010 02:09 - United States

Today, I was in my basement when I saw a giant cricket on the floor. I found an old plastic bottle of orange paint to drop on it and did so from about five feet up. The bottle exploded and splattered the walls and floor like a crime scene. The cricket hopped away untouched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 053

You deserved it 50 828

By spideypowers - 05/09/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, as I was using my mom's computer, a spider crawled onto the screen. So as per my usual reaction to seeing a spider, I smashed it as fast as I could. I missed the spider, but now I have to buy my mom a new monitor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 461

You deserved it 44 407

syley 5

Monday 17 September 2012 2:57

Karma must love bugs

DarkDaedalus009 8

Monday 17 September 2012 2:58

The clock got bored of being on the wall

Comments

kyat288 9

Monday 17 September 2012 6:53

Karma's a bitch and then you marry one

lgndary 0

Monday 17 September 2012 6:57

At least the bug didn't fly

stewpididiot 11

Monday 17 September 2012 7:15

And just what did that small bug ever do to you ?? You TOTALLY deserved it !!!

SApprentice 34

Monday 17 September 2012 7:49

Your overwhelming phobia of a harmless, tiny insect concerns me. May I suggest therapy?

Eirena 5

Monday 17 September 2012 8:00

You needed a book? It's not hard to grab some Kleenex or a paper towel.

mrtjawesome 14

Monday 17 September 2012 8:11

im sure that bug is now laughing at you in hell :)

WhoSaidThatIsh 13

Monday 17 September 2012 8:17

Puts on sunglasses. "I guess time doesn't always fly..." YEAH!!!!!!

Dixbfloppin 11

Monday 17 September 2012 8:22

You really hate bugs, don't you?

j_cat187 19

Monday 17 September 2012 8:42

Your existence is denied, prepare for the afterlife! That's why I spray bugs with lemon pledge. To them it's acid.

Nnycr 4

Monday 17 September 2012 9:03

Was this bug a butterfly? That would explain the effect of the situation.

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The Top

Today, I went out to dinner with a cute, funny, smart, amazing girl. Or at least I thought she was cute, until she started coughing after her meal. She explained that she coughs after she eats. Can you say dealbreaker? FML

I agree, your life sucks 70

You deserved it 533

Today, mid-sex, my wife told me to call her a nasty slut. I was kind of uncomfortable doing it, but I did it to make her horny. She started crying, because she didn’t realise how much it would hurt her feelings. Now I’m not sure if she’s mad at me or herself, but I’m scared either way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 738

You deserved it 280

The Top

Today, my boyfriend of two years said he would finally take me somewhere romantic. I spent my day at a Star Wars convention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 907

You deserved it 7 051

Today, I'm mad at my dad for forgetting it's my birthday. He's mad at me for not reminding him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 784

You deserved it 1 910

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 569

You deserved it 66 779

Today, I finally found something to be thankful for in my lonely life: At least I don’t have to panic whenever my period is late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 111

Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 460

You deserved it 9 165

Today, I'm on day 11 of having COVID. My husband said to me, "I hope you get better soon so we can finally have sex again." Thanks for being concerned about MY health and wellbeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 442

You deserved it 360

Same thing different taste

Lightbulb moment

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