Miscellaneous: Today, I started to tell my step-dad about a funny video I came...

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By Anonymous - 14/11/2015 11:47 - United States - Taunton

Today, I started to tell my step-dad about a funny video I came across online last night. He cut me off by saying, "Yeah? Well I came across your mom's face last night!" then left for work with a shit-eating grin on his face. I could've gone the rest of my life without knowing that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 380

You deserved it 2 080

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

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Same thing different taste

By peaaaak - 03/06/2011 10:17 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 228

You deserved it 5 055

Red Right Hand

By Hollerz90 - 02/04/2020 23:00

Today, I came home to find my dad in my room, watching porn on my computer. When I asked him what he was doing, he closed the computer, stood up, stared at me awkwardly and then said, "You should really avoid those sites" and left my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 232

You deserved it 209

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 18:08 - Russian Federation - Moscow

Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 354

You deserved it 41 614

By Noname - 06/02/2009 18:25 - United States

Today, I found some porn videos in my parents room. I put them in and began to toss off, but as the camera moved up I realized it was my mom and my step-dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 749

You deserved it 52 829

By Anonymous - 08/08/2015 05:18 - Canada

Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 562

You deserved it 2 162

Caught in 1080p

By wtf - 16/05/2014 22:25 - Australia - Narangba

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 655

You deserved it 15 006

**** addiction

By Anonymous - 03/04/2021 12:00 - United States - Boise

Today, I was recording a video on Snapchat to send to one of my friends, while unaware that my father had walked in behind me. I was talking about how I can’t watch porn anymore because my phone is broken. He now knows too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 1 393

By HeIsKindaRightTho - 16/09/2014 04:31 - United States - Houghton

Today, I video-chatted with my mom and showed her my new, very short haircut. My dad walked in, took one look at me and said, "I can only attribute this to penis envy," and walked out again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 342

You deserved it 4 940

By missyoudad. - 31/08/2010 07:54 - Australia

Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 547

You deserved it 2 866

Great joke Dad, thanks

By Anonymous - 05/07/2014 17:53 - United States

Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say, "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 902

You deserved it 7 917

loko0909 13

Sunday 15 November 2015 6:01

That's a lovely mental picture to have there.

djdeadly 14

Sunday 15 November 2015 6:16

Punch him. Then say he didn't see that coming

Comments

bronxiecat777 14

Sunday 15 November 2015 14:37

Your dad has masterfully combined the two greatest insults of the decade in to one. Your mom and your face.

scoobysnarks 15

Sunday 15 November 2015 14:46

I can't imagine what kind of cad would say that to anyone - much less a relation of any kind. I'd be ashamed to say that to my friends at a social get-together - imagine a bunch of guys at a bar or something (although I don't drink) -- and I think I'd rather die than say that to my kids.

interesting33 36

Sunday 15 November 2015 16:41

I kind of feel like this is even worse because he is the step dad so has even less right to rub this in. :/

princeewan 4

Sunday 15 November 2015 16:45

yeah

katluvr 22

Sunday 15 November 2015 16:50

Sorry OP. Sounds like your mother married a jerk who doesn't respect her or you.

shutupally 6

Sunday 15 November 2015 18:21

YIKES...how gross can a step dad be... I would return the favor and tell your mom he said that to you, I'm sure she wouldn't like being talked about that way, especially to her own son. Bring it up at the dinner table even!